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Open Poetry #27
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A cup of tea
| Open Poetry #27 |
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A cup of tea |
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Old_Shoe_New_Laces Junior Member
since 2003-06-16
Posts 31 |
'A cup of tea...' with lemon and a bit of sugar, this morning, as young men prepare for war and death, I think of a city in Europe, perhaps Rome, I forget, as an infant cries for a mothers breast, somewhere the sun hasn’t risen, ships leave harbors, a bomb explodes, someone forgets their umbrella, it snows in the mountains, a woman is de-flowered, I light a cigarette and take another sip. |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
wow! I often think about what things go on as I relax, only a few moments, many things happen in the world in just a few seconds great write, glad you've come! |
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daniel_martin Junior Member
since 2003-06-15
Posts 30london |
um.. (what do i do if they don't encourage a critique?) it's interesting, could work on rhythm though |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Drinkers always say "it's 5:00 p.m. somewhere around the world..." and sip away. I know you're having tea, but the shoe fits... and all we can do is take our little corner of the world and make it the best little corner possible... Nice write, OSNL...look forward to reading more of your poetry... |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
 to the top! |
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Local Parasite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527Transylconia, Winnipeg |
I like this concept. I've written on it myself, too... the mundane world in which we live when bombs are exploding somewhere else. It seems strange that all we are allowed to care about is that which directly influences our known universe. Perhaps someone dies just as you light that cigarette. A complete stranger who never had any impact on your life. So what do you care? It's saddening how limited our perception really is. But my pretending that saddens me is even ironic itself, in a way, isn't it...? Hah... Either way... a thought-provoking piece of poetry. Your style is one which I don't care for, but that's probably a matter of opinion, as it's one which many poets on this site prefer. It's simple, yes, but I feel it could benefit from more detail. Like I said, that's just my opinion and I could be wrong... either way, a good poem on a refreshing topic. Parasite Faith is a fine invention |
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Aenimal Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350the ass-end of space |
excellent, reminded me of Charles Bukowski's 'pull a string , a puppet moves' or maybe it's just me |
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