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Open Poetry #27
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mystic1
Junior Member
since 2003-07-25
Posts 14
Definitely not Kansas

0 posted 2003-07-26 05:40 PM



Fools dance at the withering glow
Of twilight’s last gasp
They strain at earth’s pull
To reach the heavens
And catch this fleeting orb.
Hopelessness
Perplexed, they ponder on their fate
Must they die with the fading of the light?
Are they but mayflies
Cast upon the world
To live for just one day?
What shall ye do when the day cometh?

Rain falls.
Tears well forward to escape their wretched
Restraints, only to be frozen hard
By the icy breath from a heart so cold
Even the harshest winter
Must avert its gaze

Rain falls.
Tears rage at their binds
Their fury burning within
Finally they pull free
And make their way across
The countenance of a man
So gaunt and hollow,
The journey both wearisome and perilous,
As some fall into the pockets and valleys
Of this dark mirror of death

Rain falls.
Tears pull evermore free
From eyes so shallow, lifeless
Black and stony as ebony itself
The face is borne by a man
Who once stood tall
But now cannot stand at all
He leans against the walls of self-pity
And stares up at the towers of despair
That he has wrought,
And in whose shadows he now resides
He takes breaths
Both short and quick,
The stench sickening
He pleads for an end
That he knows will never come

Rain falls.
Tears cross lips
Cut and bleeding
Their salt stinging and painful
As they pass onward evermore
Now near the end of their task
They lean eagerly to the edge
And finally, unerringly, they fall
Free at last
They tumble and spiral downward
Now on a path unknown
As quickly as their flight began
It ends, as they splash to the ground
And mix with the rain
Becoming one with the river of loneliness
Carried along by the dreams of fools,
Lost forever in the sea of time

Cry not for the fools
Cry not for the weeper
Cry not for me

Cry for no one

What shall ye do
When the day cometh?

Rain falls.


Still watching, still dreaming

© Copyright 2003 mystic1 - All Rights Reserved
angelblueyes
Member Elite
since 2003-07-19
Posts 2148
Oklahoma
1 posted 2003-07-26 06:45 PM


All I can say is WOW!!!! This is very good, continue to write your thoughts.
angelblueyes

Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
2 posted 2003-07-27 05:12 AM


I don't know what inspired you .... but this is a powerful message!
I was attracted by the RAIN .... but your Rain expresses such deep sadness, mingling with blood ...
May Rain wash away all darkness and restore innocence.
Love, Margherita

VOE
Member
since 2003-07-10
Posts 119
From the land of Camelot
3 posted 2003-07-27 06:18 AM


This one is powered by some very insightful and deep thinking.....I appreciate your thoughts here very much, and hope to see many many more!!!  ~V~

I speak from the Voice Of Experience

Jeffrey Carter
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-04-08
Posts 2367
State of constant confusion!
4 posted 2003-07-27 01:01 PM


First, let me say Welcome to Passion's! I hope you find here what I have found within it's walls, a safe harbor for the gentle spirit that is evident by the words of this poem. I was totally enchanted by it's melodious flow, This is truly a masterpiece. Thank you for sharing it with us!

Best Regards,
Jeff

mystic1
Junior Member
since 2003-07-25
Posts 14
Definitely not Kansas
5 posted 2003-07-27 01:15 PM


To Angelblueeyes, Margherita, VOE and Jeffery Carter-

Thanks for reading, opinionating and replying to this post.

To M.- The inspiration comes from within, it is the thoughts and desires of the "others", (I hate the term Alters) who create these works and compel me to let them out, either on my site, a forum or just paper. There is alot in the collection I call "The Book of Thoughts".

I have discussed this with my psychiatrist, who insists I've got it backwards. It's not they who inspire me, it is I who inspire them. To prove it, he told me to try and write something on my own, uninfluenced. I did. It's called "Listening to the Wind" and can be found in the forum "Critical Analysis #2.


To Voe, thanks for your very kind comments. "Rain" may seem at first glance as complex and sad. In fact it speaks of "sadness" and loneliness, hopelessnes and despair and how man expresses these emotions, through tears, crying. When the heavens cry, Rain falls. When men cry, it's painful and it hurts, the tears well in their eyes. Inevitably they come together and head to their common destination, their lifespan as brief as that of the fools.

To angelblueyes and J. Carter- Thanks for your kind words and commendations.

I'll explain no further, there is much more hidden within this piece. Extremly happy you all enjoyed it. I must search now for your posts, to view and comment.

TTFN

"The extreme limit of wisdom, that's what the public calls madness."

- Jean Cocteau


Still watching, still dreaming

[This message has been edited by mystic1 (07-27-2003 01:41 PM).]

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