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Open Poetry #27
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Summer Talk
| Open Poetry #27 |
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Summer Talk |
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Soleil Noir Senior Member
since 2001-12-19
Posts 688USA |
I was tic’d that you wouldn’t talk time stood too still I felt grains rush away with the tide beneath my feet I talked but you stayed tic’d waves hushed their roar seagulls fed upon my words as they floated with flotsam Sometimes summers end in more than sunsets and red sunsets stay burned behind blue irises |
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| © Copyright 2003 Soleil Noir - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Soleil Noir Very good, enjoyed. |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
Very nice, very! But, *chuckling* it seems to me that Sunshine, not me, was the food that fed your muse [This message has been edited by wranx (07-16-2003 01:00 PM).] |
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garysgirl  
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Soleil, this was very good writing. I enjoyed reading.  Hugs  Ethel |
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Soleil Noir Senior Member
since 2001-12-19
Posts 688USA |
Thank you, Sy... and Wranx...nah - it was you that took me beyond what Sun had to say... thanks so much for coming in! [This message has been edited by Soleil Noir (07-16-2003 11:27 AM).] |
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Soleil Noir Senior Member
since 2001-12-19
Posts 688USA |
Ethel, you snuck in on me. Thank you. Every once in a while, we need to vent. But now I'm off to play the day away. Thank you! |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
Sometimes summers end in more than sunsets Nothing remains the same, what has come is gone, it's just a different sunset that varies in shades and hues. Enjoyed your gentle vent Soleil~ |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Soleil~You have the most beautiful way of venting. Beautifully written. ~Hugs~ ~ I've loved you forever, in lifetimes before ~ |
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vlraynes Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229Somewhere... out there... |
Wow...I love this! This... "I was tic’d that you wouldn’t talk" Enjoyed that little play on words.  And this... "waves hushed their roar seagulls fed upon my words as they floated with flotsam Sometimes summers end in more than sunsets and red sunsets stay burned behind blue irises" Some WAY cool lines in there, lady. Definitely one of my favorites of yours. Hugs to you, friend... "So here I am with pockets full of good intentions |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
awesome write, incredible ending |
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Soleil Noir Senior Member
since 2001-12-19
Posts 688USA |
Venting comes in all forms, Blues...I prefer the quieter vent - which always seems to sound a little more trecherous than a screaming one...don't you agree? Thank you Enchantress...see above! LOL... Vicky - glad you picked up on the word play. The poem is not quite as I would have liked it - not sure what it is missing, but there's a piece out there somewhere... Dixie - thank you! |
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Patricia Member Elite
since 2003-04-06
Posts 2160Missouri |
Sometimes summers end in more than sunsets and red sunsets stay burned behind blue irises Yes, you do vent softly and beautifully. I have not mastered such venting in my poetry. I continue to remain gritty...too much so. The red sunset of marriage had burnt my perception of the world in what I saw before me. However, with time, I am learning to see things differently- on my terms. And it feels good. A wonderful write, Patricia |
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Soleil Noir Senior Member
since 2001-12-19
Posts 688USA |
Patricia! So good to see you. Thank you for reading - and understanding that a quiet voice and big pencil go a long way... |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
enjoyed |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
"sea gulls fed upon my words as they floated with flotsam" Great lines! Really! Visually and metaphorically!  Love and Light, EA |
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Etain Member
since 2003-02-22
Posts 92The moon... |
Beautiful imagery expressed in a musical way. I like it. Love, Etain. |
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Nightshade
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
Remarkable write Soleil. I believe I have experienced this myself a time or two. hugs, Chris "At one glance |
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Duncan Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455 |
"Sometimes summers end in more than sunsets and red sunsets stay burned behind blue irises" Damn I love strong endings. Nice write Soleil!  |
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