»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #26
»
Sounding - Mark1
| Open Poetry #26 |
|
Sounding - Mark1 |
|
Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
I can not tear the words That in this soul, swirl, Unsung From such coarse Language as I speak. I have tried Late nights spent in sweat Shaping tongue around rough edged syllables That do not justice to the inner pure And leave my mind and mouth in bleed of want But still… I feel as if the perfect music Could be formed As words drop On a scale SING Or strum The real. Would that I was talented… And patience my form To pick sounds slow And harmony be born Yet… I ply these thoughts For some true song A poem Phrased In syllabic symphony To just once… Once… Say it all. |
||
| © Copyright 2003 Cpat Hair - All Rights Reserved | |||
Brad Majors
since 2001-04-03
Posts 2647Georgia |
well done! |
||
|
brian sites Senior Member
since 2002-06-25
Posts 1475usa |
I am not going to deny.... you have already done that and because I know exactly what you mean some of my own favorite poems were the frustrated hairtearing "why cant I SAY IT!?!" ones sigh...words suck don't they? ah well...either this or....  |
||
|
Albert J. Allie Senior Member
since 2003-02-13
Posts 512Queens NY |
Now....THIS was sheer poetry. I loved it!! ---------------------- Yet… I ply these thoughts For some true song A poem Phrased In syllabic symphony To just once… Once… Say it all. |
||
|
regards2you Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940California |
Cpat, I have read this multiple times and come with different meanings... I hear a tune of frustration... yet, can only say I am glad you can't least we'd not have poems such as these, if I am reading this right. My comment doesn't seem like it begins to do this poem justice... so I'll only add, I am coming back later to reread it... Your poetry wrenches my mind sometimes and that is a good thing.... Hugs Pat ..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.. |
||
|
Kielo Senior Member
since 2002-02-11
Posts 1109 |
I love the poem... and I know exactly how this feels. I was doing this yesterday. Kielo I know only one thing, and that thing is that I know nothing. |
||
|
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
...I have tried... ~*~ Yes, You do... often, and well... |
||
|
serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Yes... but the thing is, we change. and we may well succeed in the record of one thought of one moment in time, but as soon as we are done, there is another story to tell. We are always, thus, playing "catch up"... There is an integrity of honest self evaluation that shows in all of your words tho cap, sometimes much to your horror!  Hugs you. |
||
Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (sigh) I think there exists such a thing as a perfect melody, but there is well more than one and you can discover it simply through which melody enthuses you the most! (big hugggsssssss) This is wonderful, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Ron, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton And that's the most wonderful thing about creating. It will always be a mystery. |
||
|
scorpio Member Ascendant
since 2002-10-02
Posts 5178right...there |
Given the talented words that you've have placed here in the past, I'd have to say you do find the words...and present them refined for us to read.. believe in what your heart feels... |
||
|
Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Captain..this is what I was trying to say in my piece 'The sounding stone'.. To write the perfect piece..to be able to say exactly what you wish to say...yes. Well done. ~Hugs~ ~Somewhere in my heart I'm always |
||
|
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Ron...You have touched the chord that we who write know to well...to write a feeling is not easy, to play it just right seems near impossible. I think you have done it well!  |
||
|
Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
I can not tear the words That in this soul, swirl, Unsung From such coarse Language as I speak. I have tried Late nights spent in sweat Shaping tongue around rough edged syllables That do not justice to the inner pure And leave my mind and mouth in bleed of want ============================ SEE????? THIS is EXACTLY what I was talking about on my thread in Sanctuary!!!! Which ironically...I had already replied to your return visit joking about my cliche admission or should I say iRONically....because then I come here and find THIS....where--with NO cliches you said what I was trting to say in my poem about lacking words..... Aint that just like a man to throw salt in a wound after saying i told you so LOL See--in my poem I said "perhaps a master poet could turn a phrase" and show me how....and now--one did |
||
|
Duncan Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455 |
'Yet… I ply these thoughts For some true song A poem Phrased In syllabic symphony To just once… Once… Say it all.' I'd have to agree with the moth on this one...  |
||
|
jellybeans Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298 |
this is incredible....as always, I not only enjoy your words, they live in my soul |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
