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Aenimal
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-11-18

Posts 7350
the ass-end of space

0 posted 2003-05-23 02:21 PM

"Oww! Dammit"
I yelled
"I warned you it was hot"
he grinned from
behind his newspaper

"Hot yes, molten no.
Christ, how do you
drink it like this?"

"It has to be like that,
stays warmer longer,"
he put down the paper
and looked up the grin gone

"Every morning I sit
with my cup of coffee
and cigarette and everyday
I get lost more in more
in thoughts.... of her."
he buried himself
back into his paper
and continued
"and by the time I snap back
to reality my coffee is cold."

I nodded in understanding
"You know, you have to forget her
and move on." I offered

"Like you with S?" he answered
I smiled and sighed
a hypocrite caught

This is the problem
in having so much
in common with a friend

So we sat in silence
and therein lies the gift
of having such a friend

In understanding there are
no need for words

____________________________________________________

Again this probably falls more into prose than poetry but quite frankly I'm too lazy and unsure enough to write anything long enough to be considered prose thus the delay in writing that novel i've always meant to..grin

Brad Majors

Member Elite

since 2001-04-03

Posts 2647
Georgia

1 posted 2003-05-23 02:30 PM

very cool

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

2 posted 2003-05-23 02:35 PM

Free verse
works for me
in the many ways
of understanding
the written
form...

Dark Angel
Member Patricius

since 1999-08-04

Posts 10095

3 posted 2003-05-23 05:22 PM

So we sat in silence
and therein lies the gift
of having such a friend

In understanding there are
no need for words

Wonderfully said Sir Raph.

Maree

Etain
Member

since 2003-02-22

Posts 92
The moon...

4 posted 2003-05-23 05:24 PM

Enjoyed, really.
Beautiful poiece.
Warm greetings,
Etain.

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

5 posted 2003-05-23 05:26 PM

Um.

You know, I like ALL of 'em, but this is mine, mine! giggles...

I like this style from you. You ARE a storyteller!

And you now I am partial to this sort of thing, because I find there is poetry in those little honest moments of life, which you just so aptly portrayed.

VERY nice, Raph.

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

6 posted 2003-05-23 06:28 PM

yes, very good write

Ratleader

Member Rara Avis

since 2003-01-23

Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass

7 posted 2003-05-23 09:06 PM

Again this probably falls more into prose than poetry

There's a phase in which poetry and prose are one....this is poetry that could become prose, and would be good either way.

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

Bill Charles
Member Patricius

since 2000-07-11

Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now

8 posted 2003-05-23 09:21 PM

Aenimal - coffee in the morning, better than ????, start that book, bet it would be a good one...

BC

garysgirl

Member Laureate

since 2002-09-29

Posts 19237
Florida, USA

9 posted 2003-05-23 10:23 PM

"Like you with S?" he answered
I smiled and sighed
a hypocrite caught

This is the problem
in having so much
in common with a friend

So we sat in silence
and therein lies the gift
of having such a friend

In understanding there are
no need for words

Raph, I have a friend like that. We have so many
thoughts alike that it's weird, sometimes.
A really good write, friend, whether it's prose or poetry.

"To be in love with love is truly to love".....by Paladin
~with heart hugs from Ethel__GG~

SimplyGold
Senior Member

since 2002-07-10

Posts 1453

10 posted 2003-05-23 11:08 PM

Aenimal,

Yes, yes. Friendship is such a gift. You state it well in this verse. I like it very much. The silence of just knowing.

SG

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-11-18

Posts 7350
the ass-end of space

11 posted 2003-05-23 11:20 PM

Thanks Brad

Sunshine as long as it works on some level

Maree sir? I've been knighted! Thanks grin

Etain thank you for the kind words

K thanks always love when you stop in and a smile too I'm in heaven

Thanks Dixie

Ed thanks I appreciate and as i said this is prose that became poetry because i was too lazy grin

BC thanks for the vote of confidence but not ready to tackle it yet

Ah the Lovely Ethel, always nice to see you and read your kind replies

Thanks Simplygold

ecrivan
Member Elite

since 2001-12-10

Posts 3923
my own state

12 posted 2003-05-24 01:00 AM

a nice reminder of a constant need to see that how others are is also a reflection of ourselves..., enjoyed

littlewing
Member Rara Avis

since 2003-03-02

Posts 9655
New York

13 posted 2003-05-25 08:30 PM

I have been away too long

she must be something . . .

xxoo

[This message has been edited by littlewing (05-26-2003 11:19 PM).]

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-11-18

Posts 7350
the ass-end of space

14 posted 2003-05-26 08:47 PM

Thanks ecrivan yes i agree

Sue yes you have but glad to have you back

vandana

Member Patricius

since 1999-10-22

Posts 10463
USA

15 posted 2003-05-27 08:23 PM

enjoyed

Nightshade

Member Patricius

since 2001-08-31

Posts 13962
just out of reach

16 posted 2003-05-27 08:35 PM

This is awesome. I really think that you should get going on that novel. You have such an ease with words. Chris

"Hope" is the thing with feathers-
that perches in the soul....

-Emily Dickinson

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-11-18

Posts 7350
the ass-end of space

17 posted 2003-05-27 10:51 PM

thanks vandana

Chris I wish the came to me that easily, a novel is a long ways off but thanks for the compliment

Honeybee
Member Ascendant

since 1999-12-26

Posts 5372
Ontario, CANADA

18 posted 2003-05-27 11:11 PM

This is poetry...a sort of stream of consciousness free verse, and you do it very well with your usual flair and rawness.

You used a cool metaphor, theme and images to convey your message...and in a sense I relate and have had moments like this...and in my case he's married now *sighs* long story.
See? No matter what, your poetry is so good that it evokes many things in me...and that's a good thing.

Melissa~

Intellectually I know that Canada is no better than any other country. Emotionally I KNOW that Canada is the best country in the world!

Jason Lyle
Senior Member

since 2003-02-07

Posts 1438
With my darkling

19 posted 2003-05-28 04:34 PM

You only write truth, and that is why I love you.

Jason

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

20 posted 2003-05-28 06:11 PM

I don't care what you call it, as long as you keep writing it, Raph.

BTW, I'm keeping this one.

Temptress

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-06-15

Posts 7136
Mobile, AL

21 posted 2003-05-28 06:39 PM

I love this...
You know, I had a friend like that once. She moved to Chicago sometime last year. This made me think of some of our conversations and the short time we spent together.

You could hurt me with your bare hands. You could hurt me using the sharp edge of what you say. JEWEL

icebox
Member Elite

since 2003-05-03

Posts 4383
in the shadows

22 posted 2003-05-29 12:48 PM

If this is not poetry, then you have fooled. Of course, I am old and fooling me may not count (too easy).

By the way, isn't coffee a sacrament?

*smile*

Well done. Thanks for sharing it.

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

23 posted 2003-05-30 04:36 AM

still makes me giggle

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

24 posted 2003-05-30 09:21 AM

prose, poetry.... call it what you want...just let me read it

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