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Open Poetry #26
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Palpable
| Open Poetry #26 |
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Palpable |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York 
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chest cracked open and bleeding from a deep slumber rapid and seething this haze the fog my hand through form thin air dimensions to another time and place erase my mistakes the cemetary lingers and I want to stay . . . |
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| © Copyright 2003 Sue Eckam - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
littlewing - one with your smile should know the touch of a smile, not of sadness... BC |
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garysgirl  
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
my hand through form thin air dimensions to another time and place erase my mistakes Littleone??   Heart Hugs to you from me, Ethel |
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Duncan Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455 |
'to another time and place erase my mistakes the cemetary lingers and I want to stay . . .' Very powerful lines and emotions in this Sue. And I like the style. |
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dreambuilder Member
since 2003-03-23
Posts 319caddyshack |
I loved this - awesome write You write dark - beautifully Matrix - would have been a cool title almost wrote a reply poem (Matrix 2)- lol as always look forward to reading more from you |
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Honeybee Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372Ontario, CANADA |
"the cemetary lingers and I want to stay" __________________________ What a powerful write, and the last line - blows me away, it's a perfect ending. You do write dark well and I relate. Melissa~ Intellectually I know that Canada is no better than any other country. Emotionally I KNOW that Canada is the best country in the world! |
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Local Parasite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527Transylconia, Winnipeg |
Excellent choice of title. Excellent subject matter... I am in love with the first four lines. What a morbid description of death, the image of a rotting corpse. Chest cracked open and bleeding from a deep slumber... now that, my good lady, is the kind of dark elegance with which I'd like to learn to write someday... Excellent closing lines. Everything about this one fully impresses me... I really can't wait to match my pen against yours. Parasite Poets are the unacknowledged legislators of the world. |
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aran Junior Member
since 2003-05-18
Posts 34 |
Well expressed. It is short and sweet (though dark), just the way i like it  |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
I like the dark side of blue you're wearing little birdie...especially your closing, wraps it up 'write' nicely. Good on you Tweety! |
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brian sites Senior Member
since 2002-06-25
Posts 1475usa |
longing pain this flies down the page..then opens it's eyes and gets us wet hugging you Sue |
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Aenimal Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350the ass-end of space |
sigh |
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QjQ Member Elite
since 2003-04-18
Posts 3756U.S.A. |
feelings well expressed Poetry gives us relief, We give poetry reason. |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
the ending definitely says it all! very powerful and sad, beautiful! |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
Bill: very sweet - as always - but as you do know - even the smiling stops in mid- air - you know - life gets in the way thank you Thanks Ethel and yes I am fine lol Hugs back atchya - I needed those littleone xxoo Duncan: thank you so much - dream: how did you get that? I tried to seem like it was a matrix - like a nether world of sorts - very cool - thank you Melissa: thank you - I love writing dark - is really my speciality - just doesnt flow out of me as much as I like - I tend to worry people when I write like this lol glad you can relate and sorry as well Brian: awesome reply - yes . . . the cracking - bleeding - man - that has been floating around for a bit now in my head - and dark elegance - I like that - thank you - as for your pen - well I can only hope mine will match yours . . . was very sweet aran: yes - I like the dark stuff too thanks Bluesy - you havent called the loony bin on me yet? lol Dark . . . I do like - thanks tweets xxoo Thanks for the hug Bri - can always use that - sorry didnt mean to soak ya - but glad I did . . . Raph: NO - you are not getting your ultimate wish - no sighing . . . I take it you liked this one? lol smile sweety xxoo Thanks Q - well expressed - good good Dixie: nice to see you see beauty in this darkness - thank you Thanks guys xxoo [This message has been edited by littlewing (05-19-2003 09:59 AM).] |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
Ah geez...late again! Let me echo all that I've read here. Really nice work! |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
enjoy your read |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (big hugggssssssss) Oh Sue, this is dark but well-written, sweet friend, I hope this is only poetry and not related to your angelic spirit as you have too much light to fall to your knees! (sigh) God Bless You, sweet friend, I send special angel hugs your way, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Sue, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton Underneath your clothes, there's an endless story |
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Ringo
since 2003-02-20
Posts 3684Saluting with misty eyes |
This is definately worth the time to read and re-read several times... I thoroughly enjoyed it. Day after day I'm more confused, |
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dreambuilder Member
since 2003-03-23
Posts 319caddyshack |
bump for my favorite poet - lol - besides "this needed to breathe" lol . . . all that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream . . . |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Your pain is indeed palpable--and very poetically expressed. I just feel like giving you a great, big hug and having some heavy girl talk over a nice hot cup of Chai tea! From your replies and poetry, I have gathered that you are going through a difficult time. Someone as sweet and wonderful as you are should never have suffer so. Healing hugs, Dear One, Linda xo |
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jwesley Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563Spring, Texas |
very, very well done, my friend...enjoyed all three reads mucho... jwesley |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
Ed: not too late - never too late . . . thank you Noah: no worries - passing thoughts and thank you - always so sweet to me Brad: thank you so much for re reading and reading . . . thanks Dream - favorite poet - geez . . . Linda: the tea sounds lovely, and yes - passing pain - you know- write it and get rid of it . . . and none of us should have to suffer so - but? That is a portion of why we write. Thank you jwelesy: thanks for reading all three . . . Thanks guys xxoo |
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