Open Poetry #26 |
Black and white night |
wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
The coal of evening is set with diamonds and the wind fingers though my hair weaving its signature into knots Silvered scimitars shatter the obsidian sky raining Ebon fragments onto my shoulders crackling echoes throughout the dark Her skin becomes porcelain glazed cold and white as a winter morning and shines translucent in the moon She takes my tarred and oiled hand and places it firm, upon her longing And it is not smudged, nor is it soiled but merely, warmed into its yielding The day is spent And the night is on… [This message has been edited by wranx (05-07-2003 08:41 AM).] |
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© Copyright 2003 E.F.Rose - All Rights Reserved | |||
Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
Men love too, don't we? And feel it like men. Well said, my friend. Ed ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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skyshine
since 2002-02-07
Posts 3058Beneath the northern stars |
That is really beautiful. Black and white can be so pretty at times.... ~Elizabeth Waited on a line of greens and blues, just to be the next to be with you.. |
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MARK V SHELDON Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 3015In a corporeal internship... |
Hey Ed... the second stanza is my favorite -- awesome imagery! -MVS You CAN make a difference: |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
ok, so now that I'm wide awake again, and vibrating.... |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
Ed: you know I love this one . . . you painted the night sky for me lol @ Kacy brilliant (for a non-writer) heheh xxoo |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
gorgeous! |
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Richy Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 3050 |
Very enjoyable! I can appreciate your talent... Well Done |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Now, had I read this before retiring I doubt I would have been plagued with restless dreams... Well done, Sir! |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
She takes my tarred and oiled hand and places it firm, upon her longing And it is not smudged, nor is it soiled But merely, warmed into its yielding had to quote this verse... excellent piece Ed... |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
You are such a gentle man...shaking my head and smiling here. You are going to need an agent, methinks. This is lovely, once again. |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
wow... what images... splendid... you see colours in black and white and I call them grey... regards, sudhir [This message has been edited by Sudhir Iyer (05-07-2003 09:23 AM).] |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
wranx...beautiful in thought and word! |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
That's a pretty diamond setting~ Love the combination of soft and rough edges that illuminate your words. Such a wonderful vision you have wranx~ |
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Honeybee Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372Ontario, CANADA |
What images you weave!...this is so beautiful. I'm saving this~ Melissa~ Intellectually I know that Canada is no better than any other country. Emotionally I KNOW that Canada is the best country in the world! |
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regards2you Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940California |
Wranx, Enjoyed greatly. Beautiful thoughts. Hugs, Pat ..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.. |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
. . . came back for the storm . . . |
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Startime55 Member Elite
since 2003-04-05
Posts 2148Alberta, Canada |
mmmmmm the night is filled with the flames of desire....I lost myself in this one...great writing... |
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Jason Lyle Senior Member
since 2003-02-07
Posts 1438With my darkling |
Awesome write Ed,and Serenity is right, you need an agent. Jason |
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Aenimal Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350the ass-end of space |
Awesome Ed and I loved Ed's (rat)comment too.. |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
An inept reply from could only take away from the beauty of this write--No, not really! Nothing could take away from the beauty of this write! Love, Light --& more Love!-- makes the world go 'round! --and you just made it spin a little bit faster! EA |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
The coal of evening is set with diamonds and the wind fingers though my hair weaving its signature into knots Silvered scimitars shatter the obsidian sky raining Ebon fragments onto my shoulders crackling echoes throughout the dark Her skin becomes porcelain glazed cold and white as a winter morning and shines translucent in the moon She takes my tarred and oiled hand and places it firm, upon her longing And it is not smudged, nor is it soiled but merely, warmed into its yielding ============================= This is absolutely amazing poetry...the imagery...the vocabulary, the alliterations, the personifications, the mix of vivid and surreal, ethereal essence youve created, and the depth of the expression is done with a gentle subtleness. Pure unadulterated poetry. Outstanding write poet sir. Im now reading on to the other pieces of this impressive collection of inspire. You're the best I've ever felt ... |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
came back to put this in me mothy library... I read the other 2 of this series, but was interupted by the phone from replying... each was as impressive as the other,and held your theme of inspire well ... still something about this poem captivates me the most. She takes my tarred and oiled hand and places it firm, upon her longing And it is not smudged, nor is it soiled but merely, warmed into its yielding *sigh* |
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