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A Pyro's Desire
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A Pyro's Desire |
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Drummerboy06 Junior Member
since 2003-03-23
Posts 46Indiana |
The strike of a match to set timber ablaze. Smoke glides through the air in a swirling gray haze. To dance with the flames in the heat of the fire, to live for its smoke is a pyro’s desire He hears every sound as he speaks to a spark, then listens intently and hears it remark with soft sizzling sounds of the glowing red embers wood crackles and pops in the peace of December. He sees every flicker and plays with a flame. Though fire can be deadly, to him it’s a game. The fire is his friend, his companion so true, it raises his spirits when he’s feeling blue. The embers die down in the ashes below which take on appearance of soot sprinkled snow. The flames fade away underneath the charred wood. It’s cold once again, and in darkness he stood. He whispers farewell to the once-living friend, then turned with remorse at the thought of fun’s end. He pulls up his hood as he walks from the fire, to live by the flame is a pyro’s desire. Half the world is composed of people who have something to say and can't, and the other half who have nothing to say and keep on saying it. - Robert F |
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Magicmystery Senior Member
since 2002-02-13
Posts 821Windsor, Ontario, Canada |
I loved your rhythm. It moved quickly... just like the flames that consume... I was caught up in this one. You certainly have my vote. An interesting topic too... Poetry that lives on the rim of sane is rare. Take care. Sherry Cherish the good memories of the past and look forward to the adventure called Tomorrow. But above all... be kind to yourself today. |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Oh, not sure I like the topic, but getting my vote fot the pure genious of the rhythm and rhyme here...would like to see it displayed in something a bit lighter and less threatening |
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WhiteRose Member Elite
since 2002-07-23
Posts 3208somebody's dungeon |
Well hello there friend  I did go over and check this poem out at SN, forgive me for not responding. This is an excellent piece quite fitting for you. I enjoyed the flow, and the rhyme is just superb. I happily cast my vote, and welcome to Passions dear poet. [This message has been edited by WhiteRose (04-01-2003 10:37 AM).] |
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Pilgrimage Member Elite
since 2001-12-04
Posts 3945Texas, USA |
I'm not a pyro, but I've listened to sparks and I love the dance of the flames. I love this poem too. Nan (Pilgrim variety) |
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Drummerboy06 Junior Member
since 2003-03-23
Posts 46Indiana |
Hmmmmmmm, edge of insane? bit lighter? less threatening? Wow, you guys (and gals) took this in the wrong direction, at least i saw it that way from your comments. When i wrote this, i was thinking of a person (namely me, but i wrote it in third POV) who was sitting in one of those campfire chairs near a bonfire. And, well i tell of the 'birth' and 'death' of the fire in the poem, but i also tell of the person playing with the fire a little (basically, i meant that he watches the fire, plays with it with his eyes, maybe takes a stick and sets it on fire then watches it burn up close so he can study the flames and how it burn. see, im able to control myself when i get near fire, i dont go psycho and try to burn down a forest or anything. I watch the fire and stir it up a little with a stick. i love fire, and so does the character in the poem, and like me ,he can control himself.). Its supposed to put you in a state of relaxation. Like when youre at home and you watch the fire in the fireplace. well thats what i saw when i had read it, but i guess that i can see how you could get the confused with the other things you had mentioned. Half the world is composed of people who have something to say and can't, and the other half who have nothing to say and keep on saying it. - Robert F |
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Drummerboy06 Junior Member
since 2003-03-23
Posts 46Indiana |
Oops, i forgot my maners, shame on me! I would like to thank all of you who have replied to this piece, your comments and opinion on improvment are greatly appreciated. I would also like to thank those who have voted that this should be included in the new book. Magicmystery: I am glad to see you enjoyed it. I spent many hours trying to made the rhythm consistant. hmmmmm...like the flames that consume... you know, I have never made that connection until now. Thanks for pointing that out to me! hoot_owl_rn: well, im happy that you liked my rhyme and rhythm schemes. I usually try to use them in my poems to set the mood and add effect to the poem (most poems with rhyme/rhythm are usually upbeat and have more of a happy theme, more pleasant thoughts than depression). I think that you read the poem in the wrong way though. I you could, please read my previous post and reread what i said about rhythm and rhyme and, read my poem again with those things in mind. Its supposed to be mellow and relaxing, but i dont think you read it that way. Think relaxing winter campfire, this should help. WhiteRose: Hello there!! Glad to see you like my poem, normally, you are tough to impress (especially by a 15 yr old in poetry), so i know that it must be good. Thank you for the vote and the warm welcome, i hope to see you around on the boards more. Pilgramage: Ohh, c'mon, everyone has a pyro in him/her. Yours maybe a little smaller, either that or you have to let the little guy/gal out! LoL, im glad you enjoyed it. Half the world is composed of people who have something to say and can't, and the other half who have nothing to say and keep on saying it. - Robert F |
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Joyce Johnson
since 2001-03-10
Posts 9912Washington State |
This is very well done and worthy of a vote. I was a little worried like the others and you did say the subject was a pyro. Which is short for pyromaniac an obsessive fire setter. But if you meant the love of fire in a contained manner, then you are only one of many and your poem is beautifully framed. Joyce |
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Mistletoe Angel 
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (big hugggsssssss) The flame is truly a very valuable tool, it is containing it that is most important as some fires get too intense and consume you and others burn out too soon! (sigh) May the flame be the beacon that has your heart carry on with strength and ardor, sweet friend, God Bless You, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet David, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
I would like to echo Joyce's reply. She wrote ver batim what I would have written but since I've had a long day, I'll take a short cut in replying!  Love & Light, EA |
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JP Senior Member
since 1999-05-25
Posts 1343Loomis, CA |
 Yesterday is ash, tomorrow is smoke; only today does the fire burn. |
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chelbs New Member
since 2003-04-03
Posts 7Wisconsin |
I didn't think there were many other people like me! In my eye, this is one of the most influential and inspiring poems i have read! Thanks, and please keep up the good work!!! -chelbs- (Ryan Chelberg) (chelbs2000@hotmail.com) Ryan Chelberg [This message has been edited by chelbs (04-03-2003 10:01 PM).] |
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waldopepper Member
since 2003-03-18
Posts 157Tennessee, USA |
Hello my friend. Good to see you here. This takes a rather disconcerting topic and treats it with a very subtle, and quite ingenious sense of ironic humor. A very revealing glimpse into the mind of a truly troubled soul. Strong words. Good stuff. |
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Chanson Senior Member
since 2000-08-19
Posts 1559Up Creek w/Out Paddle |
Campfires are mesmerizing. Looking at the flames is much like looking at clouds and telling a story using the various shapes they create. "He hears every sound as he speaks to a spark," ... Very good line! When you think you have heard it all, |
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SPIRIT Senior Member
since 2002-12-29
Posts 1745California Desert |
I thought this a brilliant write and touching on the mind of insanity. Enormously interesting either way it is read or taken. Deserving of a vote from me. |
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Flower Member
since 2003-03-15
Posts 240California |
This gets your attention and it gets my vote. Love reading all these great writes. |
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WhiteRose Member Elite
since 2002-07-23
Posts 3208somebody's dungeon |
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leighsa Member
since 2003-02-27
Posts 74Oregon, United States Of America |
This is such an inspiring piece to me i am also a piro... I love think fire is my friend when i have noon eto hang with i go start a fire and we both share very momentarly moments.... You definintly get my vote Ashgiel |
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Drummerboy06 Junior Member
since 2003-03-23
Posts 46Indiana |
Thank you Joyce, I appreciate the vote and I am glad to see that you understood what i meant in the poem. Too many of the other people took this too seriously and saw it as threatening. This isnt what its supposed to mean at all. Im happy to see you saw it in the right light. Half the world is composed of people who have something to say and can't, and the other half who have nothing to say and keep on saying it. - Robert F |
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Drummerboy06 Junior Member
since 2003-03-23
Posts 46Indiana |
Thank you Noah, you are too kind. I appreciate the reply. I believe that you are right in what you said about the flame being a valuable tool. It can be the source of both life and death, but sometimes its through death that we are reborn. So sometimes we must let the flame die so it can be rekindled and return stronger than before. Thanks for your thoughts. Half the world is composed of people who have something to say and can't, and the other half who have nothing to say and keep on saying it. - Robert F |
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Drummerboy06 Junior Member
since 2003-03-23
Posts 46Indiana |
Earth Angel -- Well the important thing is that you replied, right? Im gald to see that you tok the time to read and reply to my piece beside the fact that youve had a long day. By the way, arent all days 24 hours long? So how could you have a long day then and not everyday? LoL, im just giving you a hard time. JP -- thank you for the vote, i appreciate it. Oh, I love that quote you have at the bottom of your post. I have another like it that I really like: Yesterday's history, tomorrow's a mystery, today is a gift from God, that's why we call it the present. Half the world is composed of people who have something to say and can't, and the other half who have nothing to say and keep on saying it. - Robert F |
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Drummerboy06 Junior Member
since 2003-03-23
Posts 46Indiana |
Oh would you be suprised to find how many other people are like you chelbs. Well, thats interesting, I never imagined that my poem would mean so much to anyone. I guess that the world is just full of suprises, huh. Happy to see that you liked this piece so much, though i didnt think anyone would get this thrilled about it. Thank you for this, you have just made my day. Half the world is composed of people who have something to say and can't, and the other half who have nothing to say and keep on saying it. - Robert F |
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Drummerboy06 Junior Member
since 2003-03-23
Posts 46Indiana |
Hi Waldo, how have you been. Well, to get a review like this from WhiteRose AND you is impressive, to me at least. But one thing is bothering me, the fact that everyone keeps saying that this poem is 'a good look into the mind of a troubled soul,' or something to that extent. It makes me wonder it I am insane and really dont know it yet. Kinda wierd, but oh well. Glad to see you liked it. Half the world is composed of people who have something to say and can't, and the other half who have nothing to say and keep on saying it. - Robert F |
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Drummerboy06 Junior Member
since 2003-03-23
Posts 46Indiana |
Thank you Chanson. And yes, they are quite hypnotizing, arent they. I have often gotten lost in thought while watching the flames flicker, only to look at my watch a minute later and find that three hours have passed. Well, I know my hard work has paid off. That one line you mentioned gave me a good 45 minutes of trouble. Trying to make the rhyme and rhythm fit as well as giving me something good to build from. I appreciate the comments. Half the world is composed of people who have something to say and can't, and the other half who have nothing to say and keep on saying it. - Robert F |
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Drummerboy06 Junior Member
since 2003-03-23
Posts 46Indiana |
Here goes the insanity thing again. Well, thanks for the read, reply, and vote, SPIRIT. Brilliance has always been my goal, whether it be in school, poetry, or music that I have written. Happy to see you found it interesting, for now as I read over it, it seems weak and, well, not all that great. Maybe its just cause Ive written it, is this common?? Half the world is composed of people who have something to say and can't, and the other half who have nothing to say and keep on saying it. - Robert F |
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Drummerboy06 Junior Member
since 2003-03-23
Posts 46Indiana |
Flower, thank you for the vote. Hmmmmm, great write, eh? Well thank you again, but I have a question for you: Why dont you write poetry? At times, you must feel like you have to have a piece of the action and join in on the fun. With some practice, Im sure that you clould be a great poet. I would be interested in reading a piece if you write it. Half the world is composed of people who have something to say and can't, and the other half who have nothing to say and keep on saying it. - Robert F |
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Drummerboy06 Junior Member
since 2003-03-23
Posts 46Indiana |
Thank you for the bump WhiteRose. I almost forgot about this until i recieved a notice about a reply to the poem. I have been quite busy lately and havent bee able to log on to the internet. Today i had a half day at school so i am able to do it now. Well, thank you for the reminder and the boost, its appreciated. Half the world is composed of people who have something to say and can't, and the other half who have nothing to say and keep on saying it. - Robert F |
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Drummerboy06 Junior Member
since 2003-03-23
Posts 46Indiana |
Well leighsa, i dont know about being a piro, but i am a pyro. haha, dont mind me, im just picking on ya. Well, yet another the finds this to be inspiring, koolness. Yup, fire is everyone's friend, us pyros are just more loyal.  Thank you for the vote and the reply. I think ill take a nap and the reply to some poems later. |
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WhiteRose Member Elite
since 2002-07-23
Posts 3208somebody's dungeon |
Hi Pyro I just can't get used to calling you something else.  I see you too have made into the book. Congratulations dear friend. I am thrilled for you, and all the others who came here to find a place where you could post your words of poetry in peace. I am honored to be in the book with all of the fine poets here, and with the poets who migrated here from Sparks.  |
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Mandie New Member
since 2003-03-20
Posts 7Oregon, USA |
WOW! This poem was soooo cool! You definatally will go far with your writing, it moves so naturally and flows in a very soothing way! I loved it so much! Love always, Mandie p.s. You for sure have my vote! |
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