»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #24
»
A Sunshine Inspiration: "Hoot Owl"
| Open Poetry #24 |
|
A Sunshine Inspiration: "Hoot Owl" |
|
|
Robert Frazier Senior Member
since 2003-02-06
Posts 1014 |
Pray tell; please tell us how you feel In the depths of ink black night A gazing out your window With the covers clutched high, tight Describe each fibered reflex Fear strum synaptic thread The moment you first heard the sound from the quick sand of your bed Pray tell; please tell us every thought Set all the captives free Accelerate! My newfound friend It's almost half past three! Describe the last great impulse You could measure with dispatch Alas it's getting closer Did you hear it lift the latch? My God! You must be terrified! This poem is not of love In fact, there's no resemblance To the one about "that dove"! Now, tell us how, just how you feel when it's clear you've run afoul Bet you feel a little silly 'Tis but the hooting of an owl! Rf |
||
| © Copyright 2003 Robert Frazier - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
the_loner_23 Member Ascendant
since 2002-06-08
Posts 5479Jacksonville, Florida, USA |
Dang!!! Why can't I write this good? This is an awesome write. Cold hands means a warm heart |
||
Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
(smiling) nicely written..and builds on the pace as it is read..with a little jab at the end... I enjoyed... however... the last line.. 'Tis but the hooting of an owl can have a significance to some beliefs...where the owl is the embodied spirit of a dead relative....and that if believed could bring fright or comfort depending... |
||
|
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
I'm going to have to send more requests!  |
||
|
Robert Frazier Senior Member
since 2003-02-06
Posts 1014 |
C'Hair, Thanks for the critique, it was...well, in your words: (smiling) nicely written..and builds on the pace as it is read..with a little jab at the end... I enjoyed... Rf PS Sunshine set me up, didn't she? (bigsmile) I love 'yall! |
||
|
Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Excellent..much enjoyed.  ~Hugs~ ~ Trace my body with your words.. |
||
|
Robert Frazier Senior Member
since 2003-02-06
Posts 1014 |
loner_23, You always pick me up! I have not written much in years. In fact, all but two of my postings were written between 1976 and 1996. I suppose one just needs the proper inspiration - a muse or musers , if you will. God has pretty much taken care of the rest.Rf |
||
|
Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
(chuckling)... well the critique was not meant to have a jab at the end... so I do apologize if it sounded that way... the stray thought crossed my mind as I finished writing and went back to read again before posting my comment.... such is the way my mind works I fear... |
||
|
ecrivan Member Elite
since 2001-12-10
Posts 3923my own state |
Robert, hears to all those forest noises that used to send us under the covers quickly...in the country....it's almost as if I miss the thrill of an unknown source!! |
||
garysgirl 
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Hey, Robert...  This is really good...and to think you did it on short notice, too.....lol Hey, I like you using the words "ya'll" in your reply. Now I'm not the only one on here that says that...  Ethel...garysgirl  "Love makes the world go around" ~~with love and hugs from Ethel~~ [This message has been edited by garysgirl (02-11-2003 05:49 PM).] |
||
|
Robert Frazier Senior Member
since 2003-02-06
Posts 1014 |
CpatHair, (even more chuckling) I think we have more in common that either of us suspect. Admission: my response was meant as a joke as well. and my thoughts were same as yours - - "I hope this doesnt' backfire" I can see that we're going to have some fun! Rf! |
||
|
Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
you are a hoot! |
||
|
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Two backfires in one poem...seems to me, you two are on the same track. Robert, your next mission: Research all of Cpat Hair's Iambe poems, then read Duncan's spinoffs, and enjoy. |
||
|
Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
I love it when Karilea hands out assignments.  |
||
|
Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Robert... ignore the sunshine lady..she I think has sucked too many exhaust fumes on her commute home... no one should be sentenced to reader all the Iambe poems.. No Duncan did some nice stuff..and JM did..as well as Martie and Sunshine lade herself.... but don't waste your time on Iambe |
||
|
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Robert--You wrote this so well, with just the right buildup to the twist at the end. Very much enjoyed! |
||
|
Robert Frazier Senior Member
since 2003-02-06
Posts 1014 |
Okay, I have my homework assignment! CpatHair, Thanks to you, am now taking copious notes! Rf |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
