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Open Poetry #24
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first poem
| Open Poetry #24 |
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first poem |
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victoria_ann New Member
since 2003-01-26
Posts 3england, manchester |
Who Knows Where Tomorrow Goes As the trees dance and the moon whistles Light fades, birds sing no more With starlight whispers and sunlight kisses The winds splash, the fires fall When time stands still and the water flow ceases A frozen bliss, entwined as one The portrayal lingers, is here forever after Yet warmer than was ever known before As the sun jumps and the leaves talk Light engulfs, stars shine no more With soft touches and dark movements The flames push, the clouds curl When time moves on and the seed becomes tree A melted woe, separated as two The memory lingers, is here forever after Yet colder than was ever known before this is my first poem ive wrote in ages so honest opinions are welcome!! |
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| © Copyright 2003 victoria_ann - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Victoria, Welcome to Passions! If this is your first poem "in ages" I would love to peek into your archives... Please, check your E-mail for a Special Greeting! Karilea |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
I like it...the warm and cold is good...Welcome to Passions! I know you will like it here with us. |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
WELCOME TO PASSIONS! Very beautiful first post! I look forward to seeing more of your work. ~Hugs & Smiles, Nancy~ ~Time has cast a spell on you, |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
This is lovely!!! Welcome to the family here. I hope you enjoy your stay. Please feel free to browse around and you'll find you've made a lot of new friends.  |
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Nightshade 
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
 Enjoyed your first post!! Chris |
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Charisma
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906lost in blue pages |
ah beautiful entrance you´ve made here.....welcome to passions Charisma |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Hello Victoria Ann,  WELCOME TO PASSIONS IN POETRY I really enjoyed reading your first post. It's very good. I look forward to reading more of your work, so I hope you like it here. This is really a good place to be amongst this great big family of friends.  ~Ethel...a.k.a.garysgirl~ |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
  (smiles) Oh Victoria, this is precious, sweet friend, I hope you certainly do post some of your past poetry as I would love to see you then and now as this new piece is filled with poetic blood, this is a wonderful comeback debut, I love it! Welcome to Passions, sweet Victoria, may you be inspired by all of us here as we will all be inspired by your lovely words! I can't wait to read more of your lovely words, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Victoria, thank you for sharing!   May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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Kellie_Cantrell Senior Member
since 2002-05-22
Posts 1667New York |
Welcome to passions. Beuatiful poem. (¨`·.·´¨) (¨`·.·´¨) |
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inkedgoddess Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392Ohio |
beautifully melancholy, just how i like them |
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scorpio Member Ascendant
since 2002-10-02
Posts 5178right...there |
believe in what your heart feels... |
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gemjop Member Elite
since 2002-11-18
Posts 2587Pencilveinia, USA |
hello victoria, what a spectacular first post. wow. With starlight whispers and sunlight kisses The winds splash, the fires fall welcome to passions, this really does become a home to all that come here. full of the most lovely people you'll ever meet. lots of love, gemma xxxxxxxx learning each day, for you and i, our paths have met, i've already learnt that you are love. |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
Here's my honest opinion: Write more-more-more! This is an excellent piece, with maturity far beyond 21 years and a felicity with phrasing and imagery that would make any writer proud. I'll look forward to reading anything you choose to post here. |
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Eromyna Member
since 2002-11-29
Posts 306Pheonix, AZ, USA |
I like your style. You are able to paint with your words without devices such as rhyme. I don't always find people can do that. It often feels flat without wordplay, but you don't need it. "With soft touches and dark movements The flames push, the clouds curl" I like those lines. "The memory lingers, is here forever after Yet colder than was ever known before" And those.  Welcome."I don't need to scream for you to deem me aggravation." |
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Rick Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 2903Victoria, Australia |
Victoria_ann, I really enjoyed your first post and hope to read many more to come, you have much to offer this group of friends, hopefully we can all share together. Welcome to Passions, I hope you visit often, with your talent of pen. Sincerely Rick |
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ecrivan Member Elite
since 2001-12-10
Posts 3923my own state |
well keep the fountain of inspiration flowing...Passions has a good variety of poetry and welcome  |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
Please keep writing! This is a wonderful opening. I enjoyed this: " As the trees dance and the moon whistles Light fades, birds sing no more" Welcome to Passions! |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
I enjoyed your take on the changing weather and the course that life takes. So many good thoughts here. Welcome Victoria Ann~ |
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Windspirit Junior Member
since 2003-01-26
Posts 14New York, U.S.A. |
What a wonderful rendition of that which happens around us, that which we sometimes take for granted. Welcome to Passions. You truly are where you belong.  |
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victoria_ann New Member
since 2003-01-26
Posts 3england, manchester |
thank you, thank you, thank you!!! i am afraid the only other writings i have were completed in school and thus i am unable to locate them!! i will however, be writing more, especially now with all the wonderful encouragment i have recieved, i feel very welcome, once again thank you all!!! i am so glad you enjoyed reading it as much as i enjoyed writing, i was a bit reluctant to post my work at first! |
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