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Open Poetry #24
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Water Dreams
| Open Poetry #24 |
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Water Dreams |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion 
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Water Dream I Waiting beneath a pier, I’m mesmerized by bottle-green light shadow-playing between pylons. Feet sunk deep in sand; I linger for a lover who never comes. Caught by quickening surf, I turn to run from a wall of emerald; my legs released from the earth with a slow, sucking sound. The tsunami destroys the pier, eats the cliffs, swallows surfers - but spits me back onto sand. ************************ Water Dream II I stand in the window of a sky-high apartment perched on a cliff of shells. I’m watching a tidal force smash my windows, it pulls the building down its throat; trapping me inside a giant washing machine. I wake up in the rinse cycle. © 2003 Core [This message has been edited by Corinne (01-21-2003 11:06 PM).] |
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| © Copyright 2003 Corinne - All Rights Reserved | |||
Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
what interesting words from you... I could get freudian on you here..and I could start peeling back layers of unwritten anger... I think I will just say... I enjoyed... |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Cor, much enjoyed the read! Very cool images here m'friend. ~Hugs & Smiles,Nancy~ ~Time has cast a spell on you, |
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Effigy Member
since 2000-04-11
Posts 486disbelief |
Well done. I enoyed the read. I really truely like Water Dream II. Nice twist. |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
Thank you, Cpat. Hmmm, I thought you might pick up on some even MORE Freudian metaphors in this...But anger is certainly in here, too! And fear, I guess. Thank you Nancy! Thanks Effigy! Core |
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Mistletoe Angel 
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (sigh) Oh Corinne, this is lovely, sweet friend, I love the water and want to move right near the ocean, I'm going to Costa Rica later this year so I'll see a lot of it then, yay! (kiss on cheek) God Bless You, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Corinne, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136Mobile, AL |
Each one I read is better than the last, Cor. I hope you're doing well. I ADORE the imagery in here, and appreciate the fact that you can master it..especially since dreams are very hard to capture most of the time. Jenn ~~I Love You~~ |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
Feet sunk deep in sand; I linger for a lover who never comes. Caught by quickening surf, I turn to run from a wall of emerald; ============================================ The water that rises from the sea will forever remain a mystery to me. Enjoyed your take Corinne~ |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
I read, I liked...and I could relate. |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
The good news is you come up clean... Ready for another dream... Very interesting write, C...  |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
(chuckling) I said I could get all Freudian...but held myself in check and did not bring out the the subject lines that could be better discussed in adult but might be construed as part of the poems symbolic meaning. |
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Connel
since 2002-11-04
Posts 736Florida, USA |
Beautiful poem. I wish to become a great poet some day, but it will only come in time. Til then, I shall write my poems, and wait. |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
(chuckling) I said I could get all Freudian...but held myself in check and did not bring out the the subject lines that could be better discussed in adult but might be construed as part of the poems symbolic meaning. |
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Salty Senior Member
since 2002-11-23
Posts 669Texas |
enjoyed your descriptive write..and love the title.....it drew me in...like like a current spinning beneath the ocean. ~Salty In the Midst of movement and chaos, keep stillness inside of you. |
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Poetic Bard Member
since 2003-01-22
Posts 84Canada, BC |
I loved those two pieces. Your talent for imagery is amazing. Quite an honour to read them both. Beneath, there is more beneath, but, what is there in the end? More beneath? Or something more? |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Corinne...I've had that first dream, sans lover, very frightening. Enjoyed! |
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