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Open Poetry #24
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Beyond The Dunes
| Open Poetry #24 |
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Beyond The Dunes |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA 
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Cries fill the arid desert night as a shadow flows o'er the dips of dunes into a breeze blown door on silent and somber wings of darkened feet. Steps beyond the breath of life, aside the listless form. Awaiting death’s slow roll from thin cracked lips ...spilling life. And still the baby cries, a mourning plea, in want a mother’s nectar, comfort and warmth of a bosom's rise. Soft hushes of warm breath wander as life brings the reaper's scythe ...in hooded.death A seedling breaks earth... in quiet proclaim. Cries echo the dunes, as a star falls and angel's feet touch shifting sands. A gentle hand extends to the grasping reach of innocent fingers as dark eyes sparkle in the brilliance of light... A mother returns...an angel Guardian of the seedling growing... Against the shimmer of a moon's glow, wings soar high into the heavens as wisping tendrils of white swirl....and a new star is born... Beyond the dunes where angels fly |
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| © Copyright 2003 Barry J. Tackett - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Barry, A pretty bouquet, enjoyed the read. |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
Barry - a great one indeed. Wow, nice.... Oh, I'm getting better by the hour.... BC |
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CSKpoet Senior Member
since 2002-07-12
Posts 845Island in Paradise |
womderful imagery enjoyed Cher Poetry is: |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
enjoy  |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Beautiful, Barry. I enjoyed reading...  "Love makes the world go around" |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Something tells me that no one has a clue what this poem is all about. I should have written it with more clarity... It is about a mother that died giving birth, the reaper coming to harvest her life at death, the baby not having the warmth and comfort of the mother...though eventually being taken to heaven in the arms of an angel, the baby's mother.... SO there ya have the real story....Not one of my better writes.. |
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Aenimal Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350the ass-end of space |
I disagree it is a great write Barry, I understood the words upon rereading it, you laid it plain to see, "A mother returns...an angel Guardian of the seedling growing..." I think we sometimes respond too quickly and don't take in the full scope of your pieces. raph |
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Paul Wilson
since 2002-07-07
Posts 4711United States |
Barry...Very touching.Thanks for sharing. No matter what you think this is VERY GOOD. Paul "To share my poems with you is to share my heart with you" |
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Suetang Member Ascendant
since 2001-03-07
Posts 5187Melbourne, Australia |
Hello Barry I have just returned from holidays and yours was the first poem I read after my absence. I knew I wouldn't be disappointed and I drank in each and every word which had me mesmerized. I hope all is well with you my friend. Take care.....Sue I am in motion |
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GOlDsparklESS Member
since 2001-12-13
Posts 428central nj |
i can just say- simply burning with metaphors A seedling breaks earth... in quiet proclaim. somber wings of darkened feet. referring to the child as a seedling.. the mother as an angel oh yay- Beyond the dunes where angels fly ... your whole poem is very... real. yet the images are simple, unpretentious. |
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regards2you Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940California |
Barry, This is the fifth time I've come back to read. Thanks for the explanation; I knew that! Whoa, for more often than not my interpretation is far from poet's intent...the only thing that threw me off and made me question my own interpretation was at the last you wrote: "~a~ new star was born...yet, if both passed...... Overall, it is beautiful. Many creative, lovely lines, even without knowing poet's intent...I almost commented just for the craftmanship alone. So talented, are you. Enjoyed greatly! hugs and warm regards, Pat ..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
No Sir, I disagree... this is one of your Better writings... |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
leaves me wondering how you come up with such themes... |
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Andrew Scott Member Elite
since 1999-06-24
Posts 2558Redlands,CA,USA |
Sir Magnus... picked up on the content even without your hint, and I agree with the others in that this is great write. A harsh bit of reality captured in beautiful, haunting words. Thanks for sharing. |
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ThisDiamond Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353Michigan, USA |
I saw a different spin...in addition to the one that you explained. I understood the desolation inside the self...and how that emptiness and longing is often filled in the arms of angels... Those that we call out to in times of need. Very well done my friend. ThisDiamond |
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VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
I had understood that a baby had died and was taken up into heaven, I did miss that the mother had died and that's why she wasn't there. I felt it a beautiful way to comfort a mother whose child did not survive the birth process, or perhaps died of SIDS. It's a wonderfully comforting poem, don't sell it short at all. Whether on the shoal or on the shore, |
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Sandpiper Senior Member
since 2002-06-15
Posts 738land of flora and fauna |
wraps the reader in a gentle haunting--enjoyed! "And it was at that age...Poetry arrived in search of me...And something started in my soul." |
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