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Open Poetry #23

falling down...

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant

since 2000-04-26

Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium

0 posted 2002-11-26 11:55 AM

I am falling
down
like a tear
through your
gravity controlled
atmosphere
like autumn leaves
laden heavy with
weights

I am slipping
like drooping eyelids
feeling tired
as if they had been forced
to be wide open
for an eternity
of looking out
into faraway distance
in search of you

I am trembling
in feelings of cold
though warmly clothed
in layers of four
as cold winds howl
and frosty airs bite
hissing like a snake
that just came out
of charmer’s trance

yes, it’s sad how
innocence turned tragic
and ignorance of whims
sowed seeds of love
to reap discontent
maybe it's time
to recognise the strength
of the winds hitting my wings
and halt my flight

MARK V SHELDON
Member Elite

since 2001-06-21

Posts 3015
In a corporeal internship...

1 posted 2002-11-26 11:57 AM

Very nice, Sudhir -- this weaves like a current of cold air... perhaps a little too cold...

-MVS

"AS ABOVE SO BELOW"

vandana

Member Patricius

since 1999-10-22

Posts 10463
USA

2 posted 2002-11-26 11:58 AM

enjoy your read

Miah
Senior Member

since 2002-08-26

Posts 1062
Pennsylvania

3 posted 2002-11-26 11:59 AM

I love how you describe things. I enjoyed this a lot. Thanks for the read.

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant

since 2000-04-26

Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium

4 posted 2002-11-27 04:29 AM

Thank you all, Mark, Vandana and Miah... your coming along is much appreciated...

Regards,
Sudhir

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

5 posted 2002-12-20 05:00 AM

I say keep on flying!

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant

since 2000-04-26

Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium

6 posted 2002-12-23 07:24 AM

Thank you very much, passing~

regards,
sudhir

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