Toe, LongJohn and Balladeer
Went hiking one fine day
But, later, in the dark of night,
They couldn't find their way.

They found a farmhouse on the hill
And asked the farmer there
If there was room to put them up
It didn't matter where.

The farmer said that he had room
For only two - no more
But one could sleep out in the barn
It had a hardwood floor.

Balladeer said, "I don't mind.
I'm tired and I don't care.
You boys can sleep here in the house
And I'll bed down out there."

But when he got there that barn stunk!
He threw up on the floor
And, minutes later, Toe and John
Heard knocking on the door.

'Deer said, "Boys, I plumb forgot!
I'm Muslim, don't you know?
Cows are sacred to my faith
And near them I can't go."

LongJohn said, "no problem, 'Deer.
I'll take your place out there."
So he got up and walked out
In his chartreuse underwear.

But he discovered what 'Deer had.
The stench made his nose sore!
And,minutes later, 'Deer and Toe
Heard knocking on the door.

"Er, did I mention I'm a Jew?
I voted for Golda Meir!
And, since pigs are not kosher, boys,
I cannot sleep out there!!!"

"Good grief!", said Toe. "You guys are wimps!
Just get out of my way!
I'll have a nice, relaxing sleep
On a comfy bed of hay."

Some time passed and then there was knocking
Waking up the pair.
'Deer opened wide the kitchen door
And the cow and pig were there!!!!!!