Teen Poetry #6 |
WRONG |
roxywrestlegirl04 Member
since 2002-10-29
Posts 74good ole DINWIDDIE |
my love for him was really strong but somehow i knew it wouldnt last long cheating lying heartbreaking talks life isnt always full of moonlit walks like the waves crashing on the shore my love for him grew even more i was completly oblivious to what was going on but somehow i knew it wouldnt last long endless nights without talking endless days without walking he was never thinking i was further sinking further and further till the waves took over as we looked into each others eyes i realized there was something there that i despised something i hated someone i couldnt believe i had dated in my heart and soul went mixing with the strong current, getting bent in the back of my mind i knew he would do me wrong somehow i knew it wouldnt last long liek the sand on the shore being taken over more and more i started to realize i shouldnt be with him the lights in my loving heart were growing dim then on day he pushed me too far now i am wishing on a bright new star! |
||
© Copyright 2002 LIZ - All Rights Reserved | |||
stephanie Junior Member
since 2002-11-15
Posts 33 |
hey liz!..ive already heard this one in and ive already told ya that i thought it was great but i just thought that id tell ya again...love ya bye bye |
||
Stinky Twinkie Member
since 2002-11-26
Posts 204Dinwiddie |
you have a lot of references to the beach/water in your poems. I don't know if this is bad or good or what. The "wierd" typing gave it a slightly different feel. |
||
roxywrestlegirl04 Member
since 2002-10-29
Posts 74good ole DINWIDDIE |
a good or bad feel??....i think the reason i say so much bout the beach is cuz i LOVE it there...haha live,love,and die...but take RISKS..thatz what makes life worth the living, love worth the heartache,and death the new beginning! |
||
TopGunLauren Senior Member
since 2000-08-02
Posts 718California |
Great piece I really love it kep up the awsome work. Lauren |
||
Stinky Twinkie Member
since 2002-11-26
Posts 204Dinwiddie |
a good feel I guess. I'm not sure. It confused me, which isn't hard, so this isn't saying much. It was interesting....I'll just leave it at that. -Stinky Twinkie- |
||
quik Member
since 2002-11-27
Posts 91Dinwiddie,Virginia |
I really like it. It stands really good about what your talkin about. Keep it up and tell me what you think of mine |
||
Riley
since 2002-07-18
Posts 1038in the pouring rain |
The poem was good and all but having the title in caps lock made me hesistant to read it. It was like you were yelling * shrinks back * Other than that...ok Riley Morning mist clings to my face, and my soul opens up to you...... |
||
vlraynes Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229Somewhere... out there... |
roxywrestlegirl04~ I very much enjoyed reading this poem. I believe this may be my favorite of yours so far. Keep up the great writing. ~Vicky "...until you have read the verse on his heart, |
||
quik Member
since 2002-11-27
Posts 91Dinwiddie,Virginia |
I love this piece and just keep going with it.Love ya lots |
||
WinterWren Senior Member
since 2002-12-01
Posts 1044...Coming to |
Very good poem, I like how you compared things to the beach and the waves and all that. You have a very good talent! Laugh often, love much, live well. WinterWren |
||
lilibeelee Member
since 2001-07-12
Posts 143 |
very good write |
||
⇧ top of page ⇧ | ||
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |