Teen Poetry #6 |
Gentle Hollow |
Spine Grinder Senior Member
since 2000-10-28
Posts 1127Standing In Silence... |
Swaying softly in, a moonlight breeze- radiant. Fireflies and crickets, buzz and chirrup- constant. Deep in the Hollow, perfumed air in the night- lonesome. A fog slowly, coming down- settling. To hide the horrors, of the beastly woods- sorrowful. A carriage full of shadows, twists through the leaves- churning. And then winter comes, and the snow covers everything- placated. You can close your eyes to things you dont want to see,but u cant close your heart to things you dont want to feel. |
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© Copyright 2002 Staci Weidner - All Rights Reserved | |||
quietlydying
since 2001-06-10
Posts 935the wonderful land of oz |
this piece had some very strong imagery. it was well played out and i applaud you. and seeing as my mind does have very associative and reminiscent tendencies, this very much reminded me of the headless horseman, a story that truly freaked me out as a kid. with a dash of jack the ripper. i don't think that was what you were going for, but that's what i thought of. heh. each to their own. very well done. /jen/ what if they gave a war, and nobody came... |
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anawnda Member
since 2002-07-26
Posts 113 |
beautiful, reminds me of autumn night and the sleepy hollow, hehe |
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Local Parasite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527Transylconia, Winnipeg |
This is definitely very original, Steph. I really, really like what you did with the hyphens pointing to the adjectives. It's neat, kind of reminded me of cinquain format, only put into a line... Awesome descriptive writing, too... this is definitely one of my favourites from you, if not simply my very favourite. You're really growing as a writer. Parasite Learn to place poetry before people |
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Spine Grinder Senior Member
since 2000-10-28
Posts 1127Standing In Silence... |
I'm glad u all liked this..i wasnt sure if it would sound rite, but i'm glad u liked it, o and LP, just 4 future references, my name's Staci lol You can close your eyes to things you dont want to see,but u cant close your heart to things you dont want to feel. |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
I loved this one. Very well written. This is a great poemt. I'm glad I read it. This post has been brought to you by the 'Totally Awesome Society of Puerto Rican Egotistical Sexy Men'. |
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Local Parasite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527Transylconia, Winnipeg |
Oh yeah!! Knew it was an S name. Sorry Staci. |
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Marshalzu
since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681Lurking |
Great Imagery here, very well written and a pleaasure to read, thanks for sharing Andrew |
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