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Teen Poetry #6
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Red Roses
| Teen Poetry #6 |
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Red Roses |
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Spine Grinder Senior Member
since 2000-10-28
Posts 1127Standing In Silence... |
It’s so difficult, To overcome something This bad, when, Everywhere I go, There is no help. School…no good. Home…even worse. Yes you may be there, But I’m still lonely. You see this smile? It’s nothing but a mask. A cover-up, a lie… Everything that’s said – Just a reminder of the past. You aren’t here, When I sit down, And pour my heart out Into this notebook, With tears staining the paper. I’m stuck in a rut, I won’t seem to budge. I keep calling and calling, But still….no help will come. I see a dozen red roses, Sitting on the table, and I know, They’re not for me. And the onslaught of tears, Pours harder than ever… Slipping further and further away, From all of you now. Faster and faster everyday, As fast as speed allows… I hate everything about you! |
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| © Copyright 2003 Staci Weidner - All Rights Reserved | |||
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BabieDoll Member
since 2003-02-13
Posts 268BFE |
That took my breath away Staci! *can't breathe* That was so beautifully written! I loved every bit of it! OUTSTANDING job! ~J.Lynn  "In life you must dance like no one is watching, sing like no one is listening and love like it's never going to hurt..." [This message has been edited by BabieDoll (09-04-2003 07:58 PM).] |
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peachesNcream Senior Member
since 2001-08-21
Posts 513Ocean Of Tears |
I soooooo agree with Jenn on this one! This was an awesome poem and I just never wanted it to end! LOL. Great work and it's going in my library! ~Jess  "At the touch of love, everything becomes a poem." -Plato |
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magic_612 Member
since 2003-07-31
Posts 190NB, Canada |
This was some amazing work! The words you chose showed soooo much emotion. Thanks so much for sharing, hope to hear more! |
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BrokenAngel Member
since 2002-01-06
Posts 141Puryear, TN, USA |
Wow...I can't say much more. My eyes teared up a little when I read this. Wonderful write!! Read my work and read my thoughts |
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yankees01rugby Junior Member
since 2003-08-13
Posts 48USA |
GREAT writing! i loved it and wanted it to continue for ever! Love is like quicksand, the deeper you fall the harder it is to get out |
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BrokenDreams Member
since 2003-02-09
Posts 425In The Clouds |
Wow. That was totally amazing. I loved every word of it. This is sooo going in my library. "To handle yourself, use your head; to handle others, use your heart." -Donald Laird |
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brezee Member
since 2003-06-02
Posts 140 |
awesome!!....i don't know what else to say, i know a lot of people like this and ...i dunno but you put it in a sorta easy way to understand for people that always wonder and i think thats cool,i was so in to it, GREAT job!  ~*~*brezee*~*~ |
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SilentTears Member
since 2003-02-15
Posts 371Lost and Broken |
I agree. Beautiful. Simply beautiful. Great job. Loves. "I would sleep forever, if it meant I'd never stop dreaming..." |
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Spine Grinder Senior Member
since 2000-10-28
Posts 1127Standing In Silence... |
Wow, thanks so much everyone! Your replies are very appreciated. I'm glad you all liked this. I hate everything about you! |
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Maddy vanD Member
since 2003-09-06
Posts 99Newfoundland, Canada |
I agree somewhat with the other comments, this is a really good and powerful piece, especially these lines: "I see a dozen red roses, Sitting on the table, and I know, They’re not for me." superb!!! hmmmmm actually they would make a pretty powerful little poem all on their own don't you think Maddy |
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Toasty Member
since 2003-06-09
Posts 74my little hole in wisconsin |
I...I....wow. Simply wow. ~toasty "Nothing is so strong as gentleness; Nothing so gentle as real strength." -Francis de Sales. |
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