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rapturedmist
Junior Member

since 2003-06-23

Posts 30
USA

0 posted 2003-06-23 02:28 AM

The erroneous perceptions of reality surround
every concept and belief that I once had
As transparent illusions water down the morning sky
like fire flies in the evening light

In the next room white oleanders caress the heavens
As I walk down this sea of misery
with no hope to reach for

I stand with raptured eyes
feeling the momentary bliss of eternity that is before me

..Oh how I wish to be free

-RapturedMist
This is my first post here, not the best but it'll do.

[This message has been edited by rapturedmist (06-23-2003 01:46 PM).]

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

1 posted 2003-06-23 09:21 AM

RapturedMist~
Good morning ... welcome to Passions~

This is creatively unique in imagery~

I particulary like -
'white oleanders caress the heavens'

And may I suggest a title (found in your poem) Momentary Bliss ?

I hope you will enjoy your place in this circle of poets and friends~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
[email protected]

blueyedlioness
Member

since 2003-04-24

Posts 289
USA

2 posted 2003-06-23 01:05 PM

Welcome.

You have wonderful imagery in your poetry... I look forward to seeing more.

-Lioness

rapturedmist
Junior Member

since 2003-06-23

Posts 30
USA

3 posted 2003-06-23 01:47 PM

Thanks for the title suggestion Marge. I like it...so for now it will stay

-RM

WinterWren
Senior Member

since 2002-12-01

Posts 1044
...Coming to

4 posted 2003-06-23 07:53 PM

Welcome to piptalk!!

Judging from this poem, Im glad you're here.
Very powerful piece.
I especially love the 2nd stanza.
This one's going in my library.
Thank you for sharing.

WinterWren
Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

*Belabebeautiful*

Senior Member

since 2003-01-03

Posts 696
washington, USA

5 posted 2003-06-24 12:44 PM

Yep..better writer than me, no questions about it! heh..Loved the imagery as usuall!! White oleanders carress the heavens is possibly my favorite line but I'm still debating between that one and As transparent illusions water down the morning sky..eh, I'll just have to adore them both and all of the other lines cause I love this poem. It's short but powerful and oh so thoguht provoking as usuall, yet another to stash away!
~Live and Laugh~

Don't look to me for perfection, for I will surely let you down.
~Bella~

[This message has been edited by *Belabebeautiful* (06-24-2003 12:46 AM).]

Song_for_Serenity
Member

since 2003-05-28

Posts 97
USA

6 posted 2003-06-24 03:18 PM

Gah.. You and Bella saying that your in a writer's block make me laugh... If I didn't know you two, I would definitely wonder about what you produce when you aren't having problems writing. Like everyone said, great imagery, great flow, great poem.
~Angela

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