Teen Poetry #6 |
yesterday |
Toasty Member
since 2003-06-09
Posts 74my little hole in wisconsin |
...... In memory of Danielle........... maybe you had a hard night maybe you've had a lover's spat maybe you just didn't feel right maybe you shouldn't have drank that maybe if you hadn't taken your keys maybe if you had been more careful maybe if you had stayed to appease maybe my friend wouldn't be dead what if you had stayed or tried not to fight what if you'd stayed sober and not drove that night what if you had paid more attention what if you had kept your eyes on the road what if you had stayed and tried to save her or at the least kept her warm and sheltered from the cold but you didn't stay home, or put away that drink you didn't stay at the bar, and not take your keys you didn't pay attention you didn't even mention that the crash was your fault to put her loved ones at ease and now you've got a car to fix and now you've got your bills to pay and now you simply.. foreget the life you ended ...and the maybe's of yesterday "Nothing is so strong as gentleness; Nothing so gentle as real strength." -Francis de Sales. |
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© Copyright 2003 Patricia Clark - All Rights Reserved | |||
garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Patricia, a very strong message in your post. You said it very well. I hope people will heed this message. Hugs Ethel |
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Manth88 Junior Member
since 2003-06-15
Posts 45IL, USA |
Hey I loved your poem, thought it was great. !^*Manth88*^! |
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ESP Member Elite
since 2000-01-25
Posts 2556Floating gently on a cloud.... |
Very strong write, "...and the maybe's of yesterday"....perfect ending, powerful. Thanks for sharing Luv, Liz xxx "Gorge the honey from life, and live through the stomach aches knowing they will pass..." ~Liz Pinard 2003~ |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
Repetition can be a trap (says the guy with chomp-marks on his ankle), but it definitely works here....adds to the poem's impact. ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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Toasty Member
since 2003-06-09
Posts 74my little hole in wisconsin |
thankyou! It's nice to have people read my stuff, not to mention take some kind of meaning from it. ( sigh) I wrote it because a dear friend of mine was killed by a drunk driver who pinned the blame on her because he thought he could get away with it. I wrote this because I wanted people to realize just how dangerous & stupid it is to drink and drive. ( sigh) I'm done preaching now. ( moves off soapbox) anywho.. thanks for reading! ~ toasty "Nothing is so strong as gentleness; Nothing so gentle as real strength." -Francis de Sales. |
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