Teen Poetry #6 |
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Untitled |
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*Belabebeautiful*![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2003-01-03
Posts 696washington, USA |
There is something different about this one..I'm not sure what it is I can't quite put my finger on it but something... I thought at last the pain had passed And my feelings for you were through, But my thoughts lied... for again I cried When I slept and my dreams were of you. So vivid a picture- I felt it was real As we sat holding hands by the sea I stared in your eyes, looked deep in your soul And I knew by your side would I be. As the dream carried on the sea sang it's song So we danced to the tune that it played But the song wouldn't stay for the dream wore away And I cried for the fool I portrayed. I awoke filled with fear, surrounded in tears Still hurt from the pains of the past A mistake I had made, each night I have paid Now I wonder how long it will last… Live and laugh and make sure to always have Bella Amor (beautiful love) |
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© Copyright 2003 Bella - All Rights Reserved | |||
the_jazzician Junior Member
since 2003-01-03
Posts 30 |
Wow !! this is such a beautiful poem , its sad though but very very good. Try not to get down by any decisions you've made in the past , we all learn from our mistakes and one day we all see that those things which we considered mistakes at the time have in fact shaped our lives for the best ![]() "First remove the plank from your own eye so you can see better to remove the splinter from your brother's eye" - Jesus |
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smurf_gurl Junior Member
since 2003-01-20
Posts 19US of A |
I loved your rhyme scheme. and the poem itself is darling. I can connect with it though because I'vebeen down that road...it was long and winding, full of ups and downs. but you'll get through it, especially if you write ![]() ~Stace Boredom is killing me... |
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WinterWren Senior Member
since 2002-12-01
Posts 1044...Coming to |
Woah, That one is so awesome! You can't possibly imagine how much I love this poem!! It's definitly a keeper for my library. GREAT job! WinterWren |
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OtherSideOfTheMirror Member
since 2002-12-19
Posts 245 |
WOW thats really really really good. Literally breathtaking. |
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*Belabebeautiful*![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2003-01-03
Posts 696washington, USA |
Thank you for your comments guys! They mean a lot to me. I'm glad you like the poem. Live and laugh and make sure to always have Bella Amor (beautiful love) |
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Kielo Senior Member
since 2002-02-11
Posts 1109 |
I loved this... dreams are fickle. It actually reminded me of the verse to "You are my sunshine." You know? The song? ![]() ![]() ![]() Kielo I know only one thing, and that thing is that I know nothing. |
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