In a Distant Neverland - pipTalk Forums

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

VAS
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-11-16

Posts 7450
Oregon

0 posted 2002-08-14 06:19 PM

In a Distant Neverland

In a distant Neverland
among the knights of olde

there stood a golden castle
where dreams were bright and bold.

Desert sands once gently blew
pow’red by breezes that came by

and kings were kings
and queens were queens

and princeswooed princesses
as dragons lumbered nigh.

Bonnie carpets edged with fringe
carried masters to and fro

while genies taking whims
spun their bottles, don’t ya know.

Camels chewed tobacco
drinking juices from their leaves

and magicians cast great spells
from the magic up their sleeves.

It was a time of wonder
a time of weaving tales, spinning yarns

twixt cacti and sand dunes
amulets and dangling charms.

©August 11, 2002

Whether on the shoal or on the shore,
I'll seek the lighthouse evermore.

CSKpoet
Senior Member

since 2002-07-12

Posts 845
Island in Paradise

1 posted 2002-08-15 12:00 PM

enjoyed this tale of olde..aloha, Cher

Poetry is:
Passion, imagination and intellect running together.

Aloha with warmest regards, Cheryl Stewart Koomoa

Suetang
Member Ascendant

since 2001-03-07

Posts 5187
Melbourne, Australia

2 posted 2002-08-15 12:55 PM

Hello Virginia

I so enjoyed your magical tapestry of words which presented such stunning images.

Take care......Sue

I am in motion
I am blue
Love is an ocean
I'm anchored in you
- Shawn Mullins

Neeraja
Senior Member

since 2002-06-22

Posts 812
The Netherlands

3 posted 2002-08-21 08:27 AM

I enjoyed this poem!!!

Neeraja

ecrivan
Member Elite

since 2001-12-10

Posts 3923
my own state

4 posted 2002-08-21 09:22 AM

I like the form, the break in rhyme you applied and the ode

Blue Kitty
Member

since 2002-08-05

Posts 72
Virginia

5 posted 2002-08-21 09:29 AM

I liked this OK, but it seems like there’s a line missing that is suppose to rhyme with the Queens, but it’s a majical poem anyway.

P.

VAS
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-11-16

Posts 7450
Oregon

6 posted 2002-08-21 09:35 AM

Thanks, all, glad you enjoyed this bit of fantasy. It was written to go with a picture of a castle, on the sand, surrounded by a kind of mist.

Blue Kitty, I understand your thoughts re. the rhyme, I debated, but I chose to stretch there a bit and rhyme with by just a bit farther down with 'nigh' rather than in the spot where the word 'queens' lay. Then I chose not to rhyme with queens.

Whether on the shoal or on the shore,
I'll seek the lighthouse evermore.

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant

since 2000-04-26

Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium

7 posted 2002-08-21 09:49 AM

hey ... I want one of those carpets too... LOL...

this is beautifully writte, Virginia... much enjoyed...

Regards,
Sudhir

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.