Open Poetry #22 |
Paid |
Gunslinger Senior Member
since 1999-10-09
Posts 901TX, USA |
I've often tried to figure out- Just where it all went wrong. Just where I lost my vision; And how I lost my song. I used to be a dreamer. My life was fantasy; Oh, what an awful wakening, To see as others see. There was a girl who loved me. To her I was a knight. The agony I put her through... Some wrongs you cannot right. The saddest thing of all, I guess: Is gazing into eyes, That once were bright with laughter, And wide with each surprise. But now they're vacant windows- So sad, and dead, and cold. Gone the vibrancy of youth, They're empty now and old. Sometimes I'd like to find the grave, Where that sweet soul was laid. And lay down there, myself, and die, And mark the ledger "Paid"! |
||
© Copyright 2002 John R. Yaws - All Rights Reserved | |||
pmc Junior Member
since 2000-03-09
Posts 48Germany |
The saddest thing of all, I guess: Is gazing into eyes, That once were bright with laughter, And wide with each surprise. But now they're vacant windows- So sad, and dead, and cold. Gone the vibrancy of youth, They're empty now and old. Hello Gunslinger, I think this is excellent. pmc. |
||
Thomas119gold Senior Member
since 2002-06-03
Posts 708Biloxi, MS (city by the sea) |
Fantastic write enjoyed this even though it is very sad. Thomas |
||
passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
yes sir, I know what you mean by this...ain't it a shame? Good write of this perspective. |
||
the_loner_23 Member Ascendant
since 2002-06-08
Posts 5479Jacksonville, Florida, USA |
Awesome write Cold hands means a warm heart |
||
Nightshade
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
Gunslinger - oh, what a heartfelt write this is. Enjoyed with a tear. Chris Life is not measured by breaths you take, but by moments that take your breath away. |
||
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Very sad and very well expressed, John. |
||
Pilgrimage Member Elite
since 2001-12-04
Posts 3945Texas, USA |
This is beautiful, tragic, and totally sad. And I love the rhyme and rhythm too. Wonderful poem. Nan(Pilgrim variety) |
||
Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
GS, Such talent you have. And heart. I like that. If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again. |
||
⇧ top of page ⇧ | ||
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |