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Open Poetry #22
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The Virgin
| Open Poetry #22 |
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The Virgin |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada 
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CAUTION! Don't try this at home or any other place! The Virgin Once upon a time, a story teller spoke of a woman who lived to be free. With open anxious arms She reached out with her charms True love would always fill her needs. The seasons they remain And love still works the same To give respect or steal your charity. Born of faithful mind she gave her best time To the man who made her life complete. He knew he had it all He knew she'd never fall. True love would always fill her needs. This story should be through Where love does bond the two. And happy ever after ends the scene. The years that rolled along saw her satisfy the one Who stole her youth from the virgin seed. With innocence and warmth She burned the passion torch. True love would always fill her needs. A home and cedar hedge To her the reasons edge On those who tossed thier will to defeat. Her yeilding love did pour on the one she adored. A drink to his health was in her speech. In stride she carried on And kept her vision strong. True love would always fill her needs. The years still season all, And time does take it's toll. And the wrinkles of the term show on the cheeks. In the soft light of the dawn one day she woke alone Faithful in the bed she'd always keep. And pinned up on the wall Was a note to change it all True love had always filled her needs. With tears she came undone Her true love left to run. Her years of faith were stoned to hollow grief. The days drug on like weeks and soiled her beliefs That love so strong would always be complete. And waitin by the phone She cried and slept alone True love had always filled her needs. Those days that hemmed her in Reminded her of him And how her heart was broken by the breech. That powerful old force a love that runs it's course Can fill the human heart with disease. Late nights alone at home The mind in sorrow foams True love had always filled her needs. Now bitter not so sweet She drives through foggy streets Speeding toward the man that foiled her peace. In vogue he lived designed young girlfriend by his side When She walked up to his door tongue in cheek. The walkway light was on, The front chime softly rung True love had always filled her needs. The door swung open wide, Two shots cut up the night! And the broken bond of love was put to sleep. The role of poetry is to utter the un-utterable; to open up |
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| © Copyright 2002 Eric Lewis True - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Ethome! And you've set it to music yes? Most certainly, a yes... Excellent, sir, excellent! I truly enjoyed how you kept the one line throughout the stanzas... thank you for this  |
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wayoutwalt Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 4870TEXAS (it's all big) |
cool pome ethome |
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Mistletoe Angel 
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (big hugggssssss) Oh Eric, this is so sad but beautiful, I LOVE IT, your words always are sooooooo beautiuflly heartfelt, I could envision that cedar home on the ridge and everything! (sigh) My heart goes out to those who think of it as love at first sight but it fades away all too quick, sweet friend, this is powerful, God Bless You, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweetn Eric, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
...FANTASTIC!!... |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
ethome - very strong write with a story told of love and then sadness. Especially the ending! BC |
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VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
too too real very well done I don't recall seeing your name here much of late, so when I did I shot right in and found a powerful ethome piece Whether on the shoal or on the shore, |
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NewEnglandlazurlu Member Rara Avis
since 2002-01-04
Posts 7470A Mountain Paradise |
WOW!!!!! This was amazing. Hugs, Marti |
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alterego Member
since 2002-02-23
Posts 113Toronto, Ontario, Canada |
"Only love can break a heart" comes to mind. Glad to see you back here again, Ethome. Liked this muchly...  SheilaCreate something infinite today - Smile!!! |
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Essorant Member Elite
since 2002-08-10
Posts 4769Regina, Saskatchewan; Canada |
ethome--This was an engaging read. Nicely nicely done. Essorant. |
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Ceinwyn Member Elite
since 2000-07-09
Posts 2175VA |
Ohh dang!! (well since I shouldnt really curse!) OMG I'm soo glad I read this..*devious laugh* amazing! Kristen |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Paybacks are hell and your rhymes are swell.  Way cool story poem E-babes...love the repetative line ... and as always you set the words to melodies and give them some soul.  If all the tear drops went to heaven |
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ThisDiamond Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353Michigan, USA |
You play, you pay...set to melody. Striking Write! ThisDiamond |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
YIKES! I read this one outloud, and now I'm ready to sit and listen to it in a smoky dark corner of a pub. Well done, tune man. |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
All I can say about this one, Eric...is that it really is real...very very real and very very well written...  ~ hugs of realityLyra |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Ethome...don't forget to check announcements before you leave again... |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Eric Your lyrical poetry and bluesy stories of love get me swaying every time. So well done! |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
My goodness ... such a powerful write Eric! An excellent format and flow to this piece, and I loved how you carried the repetative line throughout, bringing home the message. True love, can indeed be a dangerous thing. Well done.  Best wishes, /Kit |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
ETHome~ I've read this over and over .... Just having a problem finding a correct response~ Trying to divorce myself from the personal level that it touches in me~ Having lost a friend due to the insanely jealous tactics of an ex taken out in this manner has perhaps left me a little more sensitive to the story~ You worked the story well .... but the ending left me wondering just who was shot ? The 'wronged' woman and her ex or the ex and the new girlfriend ? Not that it really matters ... but I can't help but wonder your intent~ Please let me know~ Too, too often (daily in fact)... this scenario is carried out ... and heralded on the evening news. It is a sad, sad commentary on society today~ If reality is a measuring stick in writing ... you measure up, poet~ Thank you, Eric~ *Hugs* ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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cherrypoptart Member
since 2002-06-09
Posts 109state of wordthiness |
Dad asked me to bump this so he could thank everyone...I think it's cool anyway ....for an old guy!! |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Sunshine I haven't put this one to music but my mind writes that way anyway......I thank you so much for taking the time to read this. Hey Walt...thanks for the read I like how you spell that. Noah...you're so kind and I thank you for the encouragement! Wow! Enchantress that's a wonderful superlative comment. Thank you so much Bill I appreciate those words. Virginia...I haven't been here of late....That small business I run is always taking me away from my fun...He he glad you could read this! Another Marti well I'll have to say you're very kind with those comments...thanks so much....I'm not very far from the coast of maine so I like your name. alterego.......that's a good one to come to mind....thanks for the read I appreciate very much. Essorant....thanks I'm glad I could engage you for a short while. Kristen...I'm so glad you read this too! I like your enthusiasm. Hi Janet....Paybacks are sacry aren't they? I do thank you so much for the thoughtful warm comments....wishin you the best poet pet. ThisDiamond thank you for the striking write comment....I'm so pleased that you could stop in to read this. Well, Midnite, I got no smoky dark corner of a pub for you to go to listen to this but I wish I did....I'm so happy it struck your active imagination that way. Sunshine... I found the announcements and I thank you very much wish I had more time to do something with that. Martie...always a pleasure to hear from you, no one is happier than I to get you swaying and I'm so happy I can because you are such a wonderful talent. Kit...How is my talented fellow Canuck poetess....Thanks for the enthusiastic comments.....sure appreciate them! Marge...Thanks for the insight into this....we've talked via email about this since and you know I meant no harm I was just relating a life experience from imagination based on fact.....I know where you're coming from though...and I thank you once again! Thanks Kid and remember to treat your old guy with love and tenderness.....or I'll have to refuse to look after your kids! The role of poetry is to utter the un-utterable; to open up |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
I think this is what they call counting the cost and paying the price...James |
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