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Open Poetry #22
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Super Dooper Pooper Scooper
| Open Poetry #22 |
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Super Dooper Pooper Scooper |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA 
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I bounced around from job to job just tryin' to find my niche Hopin' there was some way in this world to make me rich. My eighth-grade education had me well-primed for success And I was sure I'd have the very best and nothing less. I tried a hundred jobs or so that didn't work out well. My expertise and their requirements didn't seem to gel But, finally, I found the job that I've been looking for... I'm the super dooper pooper scooper at the local PetSmart store!!!  I'm the super duper pooper scooper at the local PetSmart store. I am the man with mop in hand the customers adore. I check the aisles for brand new piles that weren't there before.. I'm the super dooper pooper scooper at the local PetSmart store!  You know the pet store that I mean, where folks can take their pets And I'm sure you can visualize how messy that place gets! When cats and dogs hear nature call their actions are not subtle And they are not concerned on where they leave a pile or puddle!  As soon as they lift up a leg, I take off in a run My nose sniffs out the area where evil has been done. The fastest mop in fifty states cleans up the mess and then I'm off to do my valiant work again...again...again.  The customers all love me and my boss thinks I'm the best. I'm good at doing all the things that other folks detest. As long as I keep that floor dry I never will be poor.... I'm the super dooper pooper scooper at the local PetSmart store.  |
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| © Copyright 2002 Michael Mack - All Rights Reserved | |||
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the_loner_23 Member Ascendant
since 2002-06-08
Posts 5479Jacksonville, Florida, USA |
LMAO This was good. Cold hands means a warm heart |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Balladeer You are the cat's meow!! |
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Mistletoe Angel 
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
   ROTFL!!! And such a dirty job like this sure has its rewards, look at all those adorable kittens smiling at you for the wonderful job you've done!!! Yay!!! (big hugggssssss) Uh oh, clean up on Aisle 5, better get to it, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Michael, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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Ceinwyn Member Elite
since 2000-07-09
Posts 2175VA |
 x a gazillion times hehe..sooo cute!! quite hrm..adorable..Kristen |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
What did I do wrong? Did I make a comment earlier that brought you out of hiding? Should I retract any words that might cause you to write a crappy poem, all watered down with puddles.... Where is Toe when I really need him? Thanx Michael...this almost put me in tears of hilarity. You Duh Maaann... |
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Kitty** Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 428Charlottesville,VA USA |
I KNOW YOU ! I too work the PetSmart store, but the birds are what I clean. A feather here, a feather there, some are nice and some are mean. I'll have to say you do your job well, No wonder our boss is pissed. He gave me holy hell, for feathers that I had missed. So Mr Super Dooper, while you're patting yourself on the back. What is it that I'M finding hidden under the supply rack????  Kitty * That which gives light, must endure burning * |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
loner...thank you. Martie...and you are purrrrr-fect!  Noah...cleanup on 5? I'm on it!!! Thanks, my friend. Kristen...glad I could bring a smile! Magnus...you always did bring out the best in me! LOL! Calling Toe/ You MUST be desperate!  Kitty....Hey! I have to put it somewhere! Meet me on aisle 3....and thank you for such a clever response  |
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Honeybee Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372Ontario, CANADA |
You're the top dog when it comes to making me grin...love this M'deer Take care, Melissa~ "Poetry is not an opinion expressed... |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
LOL at this one, and the Kitty reply. Can I call you Sir Scoopsalot? |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
 Meow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Do you sell any of those striped rodents here? They are a delicacy for us kitties... Meow Lyra copyright2002 Lyra Nesius "poetry is life distilled" Gwendolyn Brooks [This message has been edited by Madame Chipmunk (09-04-2002 12:33 AM).] |
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Suetang Member Ascendant
since 2001-03-07
Posts 5187Melbourne, Australia |
Hello Michael I just loved this one and the pictures were fabulous, especially the one of Mutley!! Thanks for bringing me many smiles from your words. Take care.....Sue I am in motion |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
My  is staring at the screen saying, "well there's a poem that will have nine lives!", whatever that means?  but we both sure liked it, and got a kick out of all your crap anyway  . |
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mycafe Senior Member
since 2002-05-23
Posts 584 |
How can one not love this!!! mycafe Keep counting your blessings |
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inot2B Member Elite
since 2000-09-18
Posts 2205Arkansas |
Are you sure it is dogs and cats. Exactly where is Toerag at? Thank you for sending me to work with a smile. |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
And didn't refer to me once!!! I can't believe it?....(I saw that remark Inot), Balladeer had great training though...when he was in the army he was Chief Latrine Queen First Class.....great write 'Deer.... |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Balladeer~ I'd be rolling on the floor with laughter but with my streak of luck I'd find the pile that you were too busy to locate and clean up ! This one is a Riot-write ! RIGHT ! *Hugs* ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Glad to finally meet you! I've heard so much about you! With this incredibly funny ballad (that sounds incongruous!) you have definitely lived up to your reputation of....!!!! hehe Absolutely loved it! Earthy Angel |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
And you're a  too! |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
'Deer...you are too much!! Only YOU could have written this... SO clever are you! ~Hugs~ ~ Time has cast a spell on you |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
ROFLMAO... I love this, Bal! *S* (I have 2 cats with fur balls... do you do house calls? LOL) |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
 ...SPLOOOOTCH... |
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Greeneyes
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
Lauren~ The ocean looks like a thousand diamonds strewn across a blue blanket |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
ROFL Delightful, Mike! Thanks for the laughs! |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
LOLOL! Thanks, friends, for replies that always tickle me more than the poem! Hey, if I'm gonna be labeled a crappy poet, I may as well do my best to live up to it, right? |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
ROFL ... oh, you adorable, wonderful poet. Now you must know I loved this ... anything with a pet in mind, even pooper scoopin', lol ... that combined with your superb flow and wit ... ahhhh, you're wunnerful! Best wishes and hugs, /Kit [This message has been edited by Kit McCallum (09-04-2002 07:55 PM).] |
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Marsha
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
’Deer dearest heart, I’m on the phone to Krissy this very minute, it’s 1:00 am here. I heard a bump and called out are you okay and she squeaked at me tell ‘Deer I just fell off the settee. She loves it, she works for PetSmart she really does, which is why she keeps trying to saddle me with bunnies every week. No its true honestly, it is, she is laughing herself into an epi there. calm yourself my darling daughter I must agree with her though this is so incredibly funny, you are a brilliant writer and always make me laugh out loud. Excellent writing, absolutely excellent, I love it utterly utterly. Krissy says its one of your best and do you want a bunny? Its all right she says, it just keeps duffing over the other bunnies so she’s having to keep it segregated I’ve told her there will be trouble form the bunnies union, they will be marching up and down, or in bunnies case hopping up and down with banners saying equal rights for bunnies, no preferential treatment As we both said this is wonderful and thank you for the huge smile. And Krissy says thanks for making her laugh so much. She’ll forgive you the bruises from falling on the floor. Love and warm stuff As always Mushy  Breathe through the heat of our desire Thy coolness and they balm Let sense be dumb let flesh retire Speak through the earthquake wind and fire [This message has been edited by Marsha (09-04-2002 08:12 PM).] |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Hey Dear, I heard you were drying out the poop and making exploding golf ball out if it. But they didn't say how much a dozen. Enjoyed |
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Titia Geertman Member Ascendant
since 2001-05-07
Posts 5182Netherlands |
You go and see what I have in mind for you Scooper /pip/Forum72/HTML/001250.html Titia Like scattered leaves...my words will flow [This message has been edited by Titia Geertman (09-04-2002 09:44 PM).] |
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NewEnglandlazurlu Member Rara Avis
since 2002-01-04
Posts 7470A Mountain Paradise |
Oh my gosh, ooooh my gosh, ROTFLMAO!!!! You are fabulous and the pictures are so cute! Hugs, Marti "Even if life is full of thorns, |
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SmartChick Member Rara Avis
since 2001-09-23
Posts 7081On A Journey To The Unknown |
Balladeer, I just love this. And, I love animals, too. I have a zoo out here you know. A whole bunch of cats and kittens. Alot of dogs. Two goats. And two llamas. Even a few roosters and hens. |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
ROFL, Balladeer, this is brilliant, absolutely funny thanks for the laughs, you pooper scooper you  Maree |
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Krissy Senior Member
since 2002-02-22
Posts 556kent England |
'Deer hi there I love this the way it made me laugh and laugh, I won't blame you for the bruises I have from falling off the settee when mum read me this to me. really perfect writing thank you for this it is wonderful and I love it Mum is wrong I do not work at PetSmart I work for Pets At Home, they bought PetSmart out. as always Krissy And while thy willing soul transpiers at every pore with instant fires Andrew Marvell 1621-1678 [This message has been edited by Krissy (09-06-2002 05:30 PM).] |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
well for all my going back into the pages 30 days 200 posts per page, I missed this one...but I'm glad it got booted back up... sounds like a great job but you gotta watch the people; I'm security at WalMart...I had a guy the other day find the biggest tree in the parking lot at WalMart and he whipped it right out right there and proceeded to urinate! When I asked him why he was peeing on the tree, he said his dog got to the hydrant first. [This message has been edited by passing shadows (09-06-2002 09:15 AM).] |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
ROFL....ah, Michael, you a crappy poet? No deer, you just write about crap...LOL |
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Interloper
since 2000-11-06
Posts 8369Deep in the heart |
Now, that's what I call job security. You have certainly met you calling, Michael By the wey, if therw ae speling erors her its 'cuz I cant' see thru the tearz ov laughterr... |
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CSKpoet Senior Member
since 2002-07-12
Posts 845Island in Paradise |
I was having a crappy day till I read this lil'stand up comedy... are you going to branch out? I have some of that stuff at my house.. still ROTFL, Cher Poetry is: |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Geez, you guys are something else! You're all a pleasure to write my silly pieces of fluff for! Thank you all  Hi, Maree!!!!! |
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Skyfire
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381Riding |
*big grin* Just what I needed after today Now I miss my kitties though... |
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Tracey Member Elite
since 2001-08-29
Posts 2808where insanity meets breeding |
Too cute 'Deer...how wonderful that you found your calling in life!! You can never win or lose |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Well I think you're super duper...oh you already said that. It's like being grand high emperor of the world, it's a nasty job but you really get to clean up. Kethry Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind. Unknown |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Everybody's got a have a job... LOL this is delightful...still smiling! |
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A. L. Becker Member
since 2002-09-06
Posts 167San Francisco, California |
OMG, that was the best! you are instantly added to my library!!! Annie:- "Oh, do not ask, 'What is it?' |
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Magicmystery Senior Member
since 2002-02-13
Posts 821Windsor, Ontario, Canada |
I cannot believe I didn't post this reply earlier.... read this one a couple days ago.... I almost fell off my chair laughing.... and I sent it to my son with the note attached that this is what you will probably be doing if you insist on getting a job at a pet store (just to be around the reptiles that I won't allow him to own) He is 12... I thoroughly enjoyed this poem. {{{laughing again, tears in eyes and ribcage hurts}}} Sherry |
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*Stubby* Member
since 2002-09-19
Posts 122 |
you made my day hehehehehehehehehe thanks J |
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