navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #21 » Breaking Through (How I Got To Passions Challenge)
Open Poetry #21
Post A Reply Post New Topic Breaking Through (How I Got To Passions Challenge) Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

0 posted 2002-07-11 09:39 PM


Breaking Through
By: Noah Eaton
7/11/02

My story has not always been that happy
So much I just want to forget that's so mopey
So come back with me and you will be told
The history of this Mistletoe Angel

I have grown up in a rough suburb of Denver
Where I have no friends and I can never befriend the neighbors
I never wanted to take the school bus, I just walked
No matter what the weather, I alone followed the sidewalks

I went to this elementary school just 3/4 of a mile away
I possessed an optimistic spirit when I attended my very first day
But the result was so disasterous
I just wanted to cry all day from all the unfair harassment



Because boys my own age would pick on me for being too "girl"ish
Trying to be peaceful and proper, at the time thry thought it was ridiculous
I was abused, chased around the playground, trying to hide
I never wished to bring harm to anyone, I never wanted to fight

I tried asking my teachers for help they could provide
But they ignored my serious heartfelt cries
I suppose they just didn't understand I possess a learning difference
That I'm unique from many others, in a ways of learning preference

It turned out I have a special condition called Aspergers Syndrome
A high form of autism which makes me super-sensitive but socially numb
I cried for months thinking something was wrong with me and I had a bad disease
I continuously thought of dying because I felt no one would ever appreciate me



So after a while, I begged my mom to homeschool me
She was the only one who made me feel comfortable and was there to help me
While I was socially locked out from the rest of the world outside my window
At least I found a refuge to recuperate my sorrows

After two years my mom said "Hey, how'd you like to attend a private school?"
She invited me on a tour to the Denver Academy downtown, I thought it was peaceful
I still was nervous, but knew I had to start up again somewhere
As I still wept every while concerned of the outcome of this verdictless life out there

It happened that first day I was there, I met a man with a ponytail
His name is Philippe Ernewein, who taught me English, literature, and beat poet tall tales
Many days after school I shared my tears with him, and he told me of his life
It ended up he too grew up in rough times but perservered with might

You see, he grew up in Belgium, where he watched The Lone Ranger
He dreamed of seeing cowboys for real, so he wanted to go to America to catch Billy the Kid and derringers
He said his dad died of an overdose, so his mom wanted to embrace the Land of Opportunity
Where she can find a new hopeful life just as he desired in evety heartbeat

He couldn't speak English at first, he was always picked on everywhere he went
It wasn't till he was twelve that he knew English and he started to feel respect
He was saddened to see there were no cowboys or Indians still riding along
Yet he told me of a tool he found that pushed his heart on

He visited Chaco Canyon where he worked as a park supervisor
Where the natives cooked for him and befirended him and got him inspired
It turned out they wrote poetry, and he began to write and write and write
Which he has been doing ever since, day and night



So he told me, "Hey, have you ever thought of writing out your feelings?"
I said, "Sure, though I might not be good, can you please teach me?"
So he has given me a special gift I will never forget
Eventually, he even introduced me to the Internet

At first I visited forums that tore up my work and spit me in the face
Until one day came when I stumbled across this place
It was a bright December Day, one week before Christmas
If you ever questioned why I call myself Mistletoe Angel, well, I guess it was just because of the Christmas spirit

For the first eight months I've been here, very few ever noticed me
Whjen I was sharing all my sad thoughts and depression through poetry
But last summer I got it all out and I've been writing mostly happy poetry
All because of all you wonderful friends that I have made here in this coterie

So this is the story of how I became a star here at Passions
Yet I know my breakthrough is only just beginning, I just know it is
For I have fallen in love with a beautiful girl here named Joanna, Passions RosePetal
And maybe I may even have a happy future with my sweet Passions angel!



(Thank you all so much for being my friends, I am so happy and lucky to know you all and you will always be in my heart. I love you all so much! )


"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

[This message has been edited by Mistletoe Angel (07-11-2002 09:39 PM).]

© Copyright 2002 Nadia Lockheart - All Rights Reserved
1slick_lady
Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088
standing on a shadow's lace
1 posted 2002-07-11 09:47 PM


smoooooooooch
Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
2 posted 2002-07-11 09:49 PM


Noah sweetie!  What a sad tale this is
but fortunately, one with a happy ending.  
Also lucky for us that you found this place and made it your home, as many of us have.
Passions just wouldn't be the same without our Mistletoe Angel!!  
I appreciate you being here, and I know everyone else does as well.  
This must have been a difficult write for you...but very very well done!
~Big hugs to my sidekick!~

catalinamoon
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone
3 posted 2002-07-11 09:50 PM


Wow,Noah, what a story. I m so glad you are finding your happiness, and that you are sharing it here
Hugs
Sandra

the_loner_23
Member Ascendant
since 2002-06-08
Posts 5479
Jacksonville, Florida, USA
4 posted 2002-07-11 09:50 PM


*kiss on the cheek* That was a truly wonderful piece of work here.

Cold hands means a warm heart

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
5 posted 2002-07-11 09:51 PM



Thank you for sharing all of this with us, Noah.
It makes life seem a little better, knowing you are where you belong...

ShadowRider
Senior Member
since 2001-07-14
Posts 1038
USA
6 posted 2002-07-11 09:54 PM


human experience is a mantle easily broken
spirit is a bridle that is not easily wore
the world, dear Noah,
would be a much better place,
if only they had both of yours

caring is never a disease
it is the cure, my friend.

What a wonderful history you have, Noah,
and let me say, here and now, amigo,
I admire you!  Very much!

~huuugg~  jeff

[This message has been edited by ShadowRider (07-11-2002 09:55 PM).]

SmartChick
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-09-23
Posts 7081
On A Journey To The Unknown
7 posted 2002-07-11 10:07 PM


Noah, I am so glad you shared this with us. When I was growing up, I was picked on alot, too. I was one, who didn't like and wouldn't fight, either. Teachers can be just as cruel as kids are, sometimes. I am so glad you found your way to passions. Otherwise, I never would have known you. Your are a very kind and sensitive person. And, there is nothing wrong with that at all. Just keep on being yourself. Cause, we all love just the way you are. And, I know very well what it feels like to deal with depression. *HUGS*
Kitty**
Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 428
Charlottesville,VA USA
8 posted 2002-07-11 10:08 PM


Noah, Guess what ? Love can overcome many things, and you are LOVED here ! Always know that!
Hug and kisses to a *never say die* guy!!

Kitty

If you can't make it so,
you need to let it go!

devina
Member Elite
since 1999-10-28
Posts 3539
Cali
9 posted 2002-07-11 10:12 PM


I am sooo glad you were up to my challenge Noah!!! This place has healing properties that should be bottled!!!

My little brother had much the same aspects...and I'm encouraging him as we speak...just let it out sweet poet...



take care you!
Tanya

Open arms can be the most fragile in the world...



Madame Chipmunk
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296
Michigan
10 posted 2002-07-11 11:21 PM


Noah...thank you so much for sharing your sad but beautiful story with us.
I always knew that you were very sensitive and that is one of the qualities that I love the most about you.
You are such a very sweet young man, and I am so sorry that you had to go through so much pain before you got here....
but I am so glad that you are here and that you are a member of our family.
~ many warm hugs from an older (much older) Passions sister

Lyra

copyright2002 Lyra Nesius

"poetry is life distilled"  Gwendolyn Brooks

mycafe
Senior Member
since 2002-05-23
Posts 584

11 posted 2002-07-11 11:42 PM


Noah, your story touched me deeply.  You've a wonderful soul and I can feel it from your words...Please continue to be our shining star and one-and-only Passion's Mistletoe Angel. *Hugs*

mycafe


Keep counting your blessings

Suetang
Member Ascendant
since 2001-03-07
Posts 5187
Melbourne, Australia
12 posted 2002-07-11 11:58 PM


Hello Noah

Your light has always shone brightly on me and many others.  You are an example to so many and you are one of the kindest souls I know.  You welcomed me here with open arms and I feel sure you have read just about everything I put on here which totally humbles me every time. The story of your life was so very moving and brought tears to my eyes.  I feel we are all indebted to your Belgium teacher who lead you towards writing poetry and look at you now.  Your words have bloomed into a most beautiful bouquet for all of us to enjoy.

Take care my friend.......Sue

I am in motion
I am blue
Love is an ocean
I'm anchored in you
- Shawn Mullins

GoddessofHell
Member
since 2002-07-09
Posts 76

13 posted 2002-07-12 12:34 PM


Noah....you are the sweetest soul ....I have been reading your poems for along time now ( I was to shy to post until here recently) but I can tell you are very sensitive. This makes for a wonderful poet and a wonderful person.

The dawn approaches and drowns out this night
Sunshine pours over all in sight
The past now slips further away
As G_ds light creates the morning of day


Enjoy your work very much!
Heather


Duncan
Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455

14 posted 2002-07-12 01:01 AM


Hey Noah...you tell a damn good story!

You wanna tell 'em about the mmmmmm sound or should I?

CocoBaci
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043

15 posted 2002-07-12 02:26 AM


muahhhhhh on cheekz my dear dear Angel...
You have brought sooooo many smiles2many of us here (moi included) and I'm elated at the chance2have come2know you and I wish you and sweetie Joanna all the best =)
Hearthugs2u
*~coco~*

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
16 posted 2002-07-12 05:46 AM


thanks for the insight...and know you are loved here...no matter what
Chanson
Senior Member
since 2000-08-19
Posts 1559
Up Creek w/Out Paddle
17 posted 2002-07-12 08:21 AM


And what a beautiful heart you possess! Keep on keeping on, dear Noah. *s

When you think you have read it all,
read some more.
~Dorene

Sunnyone
Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334
Staffordshire, England
18 posted 2002-07-12 11:23 AM


Noah...
Now I feel like I know you as family, a brother, and I'm proud to be able to share the same love of poetry with you.  I, too, had a similar childhood, as many of us here will admit to.  But, from the moment I came here to Passions, I felt so much like I had come home.  We're your family, and we love you, and wish you and your new love the very best.  You have always brightened my heart when I've read your replies, and I hope this one does the same for you....

Open the door and let your adventure begin!!!
  
    


Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082
Victoria Australia
19 posted 2002-07-12 11:30 AM


Noah,
thanks so much for sharing your story with me. You did it so well. *HuGGLeS*
Lynne

Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind.  Unknown



Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
20 posted 2002-07-12 02:11 PM


Noah

I appreciate the honesty with which you wrote about your life.  Isn't it wonderful how sometimes, just one special person can change your life around.  You were lucky to find the mentor that you did.  All things happen for a reason, I think.  I'm so glad  you are part of this family.  You are very dear!

Music Maker
Member
since 2002-07-07
Posts 152
THE ORIGINAL !!!!
21 posted 2002-07-12 02:39 PM


Noah, Noah, Noah.
I have never spoken to you before, but you have spoken to me many times as I have read your submissions over the last few months.  It is now over 2 hours since I read your submission, I walked away from the computer in tears.  You see - for 50 years, I have shut away a similar background in the dark recesses of my mind, and your words just brought it all back.   I was a 'Mummys Boy', a bullied child, and my form Master (an ex-Serviceman), begged my parents not to let me go into the Armed Forces, as it would kill me.  Now click on the little 'house' above this post, and see what I did!!!   I hope this  encourages you, and gives you inspiration.  
Kind Thoughts to you, Dear Friend.
John

Grass won't grow under feet that don't move.

NewEnglandlazurlu
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-01-04
Posts 7470
A Mountain Paradise
22 posted 2002-07-12 03:45 PM


Noah, you sweet, sweet thing. People can be so cruel and unkind, especially to kids they think are a little different. Thank goodness you hung in there. Your mom must be an angel and so proud of you and your poetry.

I love reading what you write and each time I come to Passions, I know there will be messages at the end of everyone's poems, from our dear Noah. You encourage and say wonderful things to each and every one of us. We so appreciate it and love you dearly.

My friend's son also has Asperger's Syndrome. He is such a little cutie and I pray he will find someone like your Mr. Ernewein to encourage him when he's older.

Love you lots and keep writing and getting those feelings out. Hugs, Marti

" My wrinkles are badges of courage and reveal that I am a Mother."

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
23 posted 2002-07-12 04:42 PM


such a wonderful story, told in your own way, Noah..I, too, am told and  know I am  super sensitive to many stimuli..to  some they will think I am hyperactive(especially when young but it wasn't heard of way back then..)  I talk fast in real life so some people will tell me to calm down, take it easy as I always seem excited but it's just that I love life(usually) and can get a natural high from it. So I know what you mean...about being picked on..but  the exception is I love people...all people....so I belonged to no groups fearing I would leave someone out. But I had friends all over because of that...and today when I run into them..they all remember me..in a kind way.  Now I think I understand you and your poetry much better and I thank you for the gift of your words and hope that you do find the happiness you so deserve.

hugsss
M

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
24 posted 2002-07-12 06:47 PM


Thanks for sharing your interesting story Noah...James
Larry C
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286
United States
25 posted 2002-07-12 11:27 PM


Noah,
Seemed like the tale of a castaway! Just more proof that you're a survivor. Glad you are here.

Show you care to those you love...today.

kaile
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146
singapore
26 posted 2002-07-14 11:23 AM


Noah,
sorry to learn of your past but glad to know that you have persevered through your difficult times without compromising your values of kindness and sensitivity...you are an inspiration to lesser moi..

Titia Geertman
Member Ascendant
since 2001-05-07
Posts 5182
Netherlands
27 posted 2002-07-14 06:14 PM



You're the sweetest Mistletoe Angel I've ever come across, I'm glad I may call you my friend

Titia

Like scattered leaves...my words will flow

Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
28 posted 2002-07-14 09:25 PM


Hi Noah,

a heart-felt, bitter-sweet, honest self-portrait.

It's wonderful that your Mom helped you get to that private school and that you finally found a great teacher who understood you.

For a while, it was thought that my son had high functioning Aspergers, he's very bright but for a time, had a lot of trouble focusing (they also said he was depressed and ADD) and getting along with other kids at school. He cried almost daily at school - on the playground, when he felt things weren't going his way. The docs wanted to put him on drugs for the ADD and antidepressents for the depression, and also wanted to enroll him in a special program.

I decided against medication, and made some major life changes to take some of the stress off of him. He's still highly dramatic and sometimes throws screaming fits, but he's gradually growing out of them. Last year (as a 5th grader) he was in the honor roll society for all semesters.

It tears a mother's heart out to see her child having trouble making friends and learning to socialize with other kids. You have much to be thankful for.

Peace,

Cor

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
29 posted 2002-07-14 09:28 PM


Thanks for sharing this Noah!  I'm with you all the way!  You're an excellent writer!
suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
30 posted 2002-07-15 11:46 AM


You write so many wonderful poems, it's hard to choose a favorite... but this is one. *S* I know it was hard to write... but there is beauty in such honesty. *S* It was a lucky day for us when you found PIP. *S*
Neeraja
Senior Member
since 2002-06-22
Posts 812
The Netherlands
31 posted 2002-07-15 12:47 PM


What a very touching story Noah, and I admire your courage to write it down to share this with us... Thank you so much Noah!

You are such a pure soul...  

Neeraja     

BloomingRose
Member Elite
since 2000-08-09
Posts 3092
Florida
32 posted 2002-07-15 01:18 PM


Noah,
Always remember that you are loved. You've been a spark of sunshine to all who have come to know you!
The dedication and love you give to everyone in your generous replies is unsurpassed.
So glad you found Passion's, and I hope you stay for a very long time!

Hugs,
Deb

Charisma
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906
lost in blue pages
33 posted 2002-07-16 06:21 PM


nah do you realize what you've done to me now.....yep you got me, *wiping my teary eyes*, and I am so glad you found this place, and being an angel among these blue pages. May love always lighten your path dear friend

(((warm hugsssss)))

Charisma

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #21 » Breaking Through (How I Got To Passions Challenge)

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary