Open Poetry #21 |
Riptide of Dawn - (Where is it Written) |
Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Riptide of Dawn - (Where is it Written) Where is it written that two souls caught in the glow Should find their answer in the having to let you go One kiss to last through the eternity of years in tears Where is it written that a hollow heart bring cheers Paths of bliss open to the beckoning of tear-filled tide A sea of destiny rises from another time to be denied Cherished is the allure ... that shall never be painted Freeing this canvas of fate from oils already tainted Rippled reflections prowl on crests of ambered kiss Capturing stealth of truth ... another gaze to dismiss Shadowed caresses lost in one single beam of moon Extinguished between reasonings surging too soon Anxious hearts touch ... between fingers of entwine Skirting atop waves of abandoned romance divine Love nestled between sighs in glimmer of open eyes Caught in a whisper of breezes wrapped in surprise Where is it written that two souls caught in the glow Should find their answer in the having to let you go One kiss to last through the eternity of years in tears Where is it written that a hollow heart bring cheers Where is it written? On diamond beaches ... caught in the riptide of dawn Mark Christopher Make sure you recognize love as the gift it is and not a need that is out of focus |
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© Copyright 2002 Mark Bohannan - All Rights Reserved | |||
Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Mark, In this passage you caught it all. Where is it written that two souls caught in the glow Should find their answer in the having to let you go One kiss to last through the eternity of years in tears Where is it written that a hollow heart bring cheers |
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catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
Mark, this touches me. I often ask myself how can I live on that last kiss. You did this so well. Sandra |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Not written anywhere I know, Mark. Nice to see your words gracing us again |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Where is it written that two souls caught in the glow Should find their answer in the having to let you go One kiss to last through the eternity of years in tears Where is it written that a hollow heart bring cheers --------------------------------------------- Mark, this opening stanza, repeated at the end...say it all. Excellent write sir. |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Mark Tears are written into history, into forever and into these words so beautiful. You have brought me some of my own tonight, dear friend. |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Where is it written that two souls caught in the glow Should find their answer in the having to let you go One kiss to last through the eternity of years in tears Where is it written that a hollow heart bring cheers Where is it written? On diamond beaches ... I love the romance, Mark..... this is very beautiful. ~ poetic hugs Lyra |
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sigheyes Member
since 2001-04-25
Posts 323the winds of destiny |
WOW, I am begining to quickly become a favorite fan of yours. Incredible. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
An exquisite write, Mark...you've not lost your touch at all...in fact, it seems you've added a certain gleam to the threads.... |
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
Rippled reflections prowl on crests of ambered kiss Capturing stealth of truth ... another gaze to dismiss Shadowed caresses lost in one single beam of moon Extinguished between reasonings surging too soon~~~~ and then as if that already wasn't enough we get this~~~ Anxious hearts touch ... between fingers of entwine Skirting atop waves of abandoned romance divine Love nestled between sighs in glimmer of open eyes Caught in a whisper of breezes wrapped in surprise This is just such an incredible piece of writing that I couldn't even pick favorites, the entire flow is perfect and the images are so divine that all I can really do is just say I love it and hope that is enough. Gawd, how do you do this?? Incredible.... Enjoy life, this is NOT a dress rehearsal. {on the wings of words are spirits fly...and our souls are free~me} [This message has been edited by Gentle Spirit (07-06-2002 10:22 PM).] |
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A Whisper's Caress Senior Member
since 2000-11-03
Posts 791on the horizon of a fairytale |
Mark, This piece is exactly the kind of poetry that brought me here. love to your warm heart, dear poet. ever deep...runs |
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Duncan Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455 |
Where is it written that two souls caught in the glow Should find their answer in the having to let you go One kiss to last through the eternity of years in tears Where is it written that a hollow heart bring cheers One kiss to last through eternity? Oh god, I hope not. (btw...nice to finally meet ya). Just noticed your critique line...lmao! Forgetting all I'm lacking |
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rwood Member Elite
since 2000-02-29
Posts 3793Tennessee |
Paths of bliss open to the beckoning of tear-filled tide A sea of destiny rises from another time to be denied Cherished is the allure ... that shall never be painted Freeing this canvas of fate from oils already tainted Oh my goodness..heart tides. That sand..that horizon and those waves of fate. It does rip at one's soul to know the above words..and still not be able to bear the words of parting. Many emotions roll through this..so many..for me. The one that hits hardest is knowing. I needed to feel that today. Sincerely, Reg |
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EagleOne Member Elite
since 2000-03-07
Posts 2829Between a laugh and a tear... |
An absolutely stunning piece, bravo! Maybe all one can do is hope to end up with the right regrets. ~Arthur Miller |
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CocoBaci Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043 |
Anxious hearts touch ... between fingers of entwine Skirting atop waves of abandoned romance divine Love nestled between sighs in glimmer of open eyes Caught in a whisper of breezes wrapped in surprise MarkSweetie, like our PoetFriends above have stated your writing here is exquisite and I especially adore the above verse... Thank you dearPoetFriend for this special treat of a read2nite... Smiles2uAlways *~coco~* |
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mycafe Senior Member
since 2002-05-23
Posts 584 |
This is such a beautiful piece. I can't help reading it over and over again. So especially loved these lines... "Cherished is the allure ... that shall never be painted Freeing this canvas of fate from oils already tainted" I'm already anxiously waiting for your next poem ~mycafe Keep counting your blessings [This message has been edited by mycafe (07-07-2002 09:55 PM).] |
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Sunnyone Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334Staffordshire, England |
Hello Mark... Yours is the first beautiful poem I have read after a long hiatus. Where is it written.......where? Anything from your pen is like fluid paint on a waiting canvas. Open the door and let your adventure begin!!! |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Where is it written that two souls caught in the glow Should find their answer in the having to let you go ============================== Paths of bliss open to the beckoning of tear-filled tide A sea of destiny rises from another time to be denied Cherished is the allure ... that shall never be painted Freeing this canvas of fate from oils already tainted Rippled reflections prowl on crests of ambered kiss Capturing stealth of truth ... another gaze to dismiss Shadowed caresses lost in one single beam of moon Extinguished between reasonings surging too soon Anxious hearts touch ... between fingers of entwine Skirting atop waves of abandoned romance divine Love nestled between sighs in glimmer of open eyes Caught in a whisper of breezes wrapped in surprise ==================================== Well, you know my penchant for sad poetry... and also my craving for cadence...so needless to say this will be one that I find much to admire in... this is pure poetry in motion when read aloud...but above and beyond the rhymed perfection there are so many absolutely beautiful lines in this bittersweet gift of your pen. Cherished is the allure ... that shall never be painted Freeing this canvas of fate from oils already tainted those lines just swept me and held me impressed when I read this for the first time...and find myself coming back to them each time I've read since. Exceptional phrasing, metaphor and expression. Once again I have to point out the personifications and stunning images you use to set the scene and to define the emotions. beckoning of tear-filled tide crests of ambered kiss waves of abandoned romance divine There are so many impressive lines and phrases in this...its very hard to pick a fave verse...they belong together to create this melancholy masterpiece. The emotions are felt with a depth of ache and loss that is matched only by the images that youve painted to enchance them. I know you dont really like writing "sad" but this( and the other version of this you sent me) proves that no matter what perspective you write from..you make it your own and take your poetry to a higher level. See this write thru my eyes...its a most impresive view ... you wouldnt doubt a moth would you? |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Sy- If you say it is caught then it IS caught. Thank you much. Sandra-Thank you dearly. When the first kiss is the last kiss, then maybe the acceptance becomes easier. Or does it?? Balladeer- And I hope you never discover it written anywhere either. Thank you and it is good to be back. Enchantress - The wind too?????? Wow, it is everywhere!! LOL Thanks for your kind words. I am glad you liked the repetitiveness. Martie- I can only hope they are the ones that cleanse. Thanks to you dear friend and many hugs to you. Lyra- Thank you and I am glad you found romance in it. sigheyes - Thank you dearly for the wonderful words. A fan of poetry is all the acceptance any poet could ask for. Sunshine - I hope you mean a touch of good vs. NOT. Thank you much. Gentle Spirit-I am elated that you enjoyed the entire piece and of course you loving it is enough. I do thank you from the bottom of my heart. A Whisper's Caress-This is definitely the place to find all the poetry one good need. Thank you kindly. Duncan-Hey one kiss is better than none isn't it? Nice to meet you also. You look just like they all said you would. I am glad you liked my critique line but there is more truth in it than you may realize. Thank you and I will be visiting you again soon. Regina- If you needed to feel this today then I am happy that I could help you get there. Anytime I can help, you just give a holler and I'll do my best. Yes, knowing is the hardest, but let's be honest ... isn't it better to have felt it than not being able to feel at all? Thank you dearly for your lovely words and for bringing your country smile this way. Eddie-Hey!!!!!!! What's up? How the heck have ya been? Thank you for those kind words and please start posting some poems from that pen of yours for us to indulge in. Coco- Thanks sweet poet of smiles. I am glad you have a favorite verse as it is always nice to see what a person likes best in a piece. You are treasured beyond measure. mycafe-As long as you aren't doing with your breath held. LOL Thank you much. Sunnyone-Hey there girl. Don't worry, I have been gone much longer than you and only recently got back myself. Thank you for making me your first and for the wonderful comments. Hope all is fine with you in your new home. JM - HEY!!!!! What about the inner rhyme and all that stuff? ROFL Seriously girlie, I am elated that you find this one impressive but let's get back to happy ones now, okay? Your comments and your critiques (off-line) always give me something to measure myself by and I thank you for that. The fact that you enjoy the imagery and the personifications in my works, especially those that carry the emotion, sorta urges me on to make each one better. As for the other version ... BURN IT, SHRED IT, AND BURY IT OUT TO SEA. Doubt a moth? We really shouldn't go there in a public forum now should we? I wouldn't want any images being spoiled. LOL Okay, thanks sweetie poet of mothiness. Talk to ya in a bit. |
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Greeneyes
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
Mark~ I have always been swept away by your words....it's great to see you posting again such beautiful words, and images.... Lauren~ The ocean looks like a thousand diamonds strewn across a blue blanket |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Aww c'mon now baby...you dont really think the inner rhyme got past these mothy eyes do ya. That would be like getting zapped in a bug light (dont say it!!) The "extra effort" you took in putting them there makes them even cooler One kiss to last through the eternity of years in tears Love nestled between sighs in glimmer of open eyes internal rhymes divine Does this mean I'm rubbing off on you ROFL and for the moth record..I didnt miss the alliterations either.... hollow heart Rippled reflections shheeese...you Aquarians are so hard to please thank you for indulging the moth ... I will expect this weekly now!! heh (say yeppers) |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
My this is beautiful work again Mark! Rippled reflections prowl on crests of ambered kiss Capturing stealth of truth ... another gaze to dismiss Shadowed caresses lost in one single beam of moon Extinguished between reasonings surging too soon I like the poetic reasoning in that verse! This repetition verse and final lines are very emphatic of the emotion....Just beautiful work! Where is it written that two souls caught in the glow Should find their answer in the having to let you go One kiss to last through the eternity of years in tears Where is it written that a hollow heart bring cheers Where is it written? On diamond beaches ... caught in the riptide of dawn Thumbs up! |
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Saunni Senior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 1777West Virginia |
Mark, everything about this is just AWESOME! Sauni:)The Only Time I See The Sun Is When I'm Within That Vanilla Breeze.The Only Time I'm One With The Sun Is When He Shelters Me From The Rain. L.S |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Lauren- Thank you much. Hope you don't get swept out to see. I appreciate you kindness. JM - THERE ARE WEEDS IN YOUR GARDEN THAT NEED TENDING!!!!! Try a little sunshine. It might just put some color in your wings. LOL Eric- For you to give it a thumbs up means much to me. Thank you for the response and I am glad you liked the repetitive verse. I am also elated that you found the reasoning in it as well. Saunni - AWESOME works. Thank you very much. |
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cherrypoptart Member
since 2002-06-09
Posts 109state of wordthiness |
This is such good writing. I think it's written in the book of time and circumstance. |
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
Mark this is so well worth a second read, and a bump back to the top where it belongs...*s* Truly outstanding write cowboy. Enjoy life, this is NOT a dress rehearsal. |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
mark.... a pleasure to read this art, enjoyed the romantica of it and the bitter sweet also. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
"Where is it written that two souls caught in the glow Should find their answer in the having to let you go" Well, you don't HAVE to let go...but the true beauty of a butterfly is in her flight! (Pin them down, frame them, and hang them on the wall? They become SPECIMEN. ) sorry about that, I DO go "off" sometimes... Your talent has only grown, m'friend, as has your spirit and capacity of heart. It is a pure pleasure to read you. |
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Pilgrimage Member Elite
since 2001-12-04
Posts 3945Texas, USA |
This is beautiful. Simply beautiful. Nan |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
cherrypoptart-You have no idea how close you are with that comment. Actually it was retrospect and circumstance in a bit of a ramble gone rhyme. Thank you very much for your gracious words. Gentle Spirit-For you to come back for a second read is more than I could have hoped for. I thank you for your always generous and warming response. Dark Stranger-The word art alone was enough of a compliment and I thank you very much. serenity-Sometimes I wish you didn't make such perfect sense, but of course you do and all I can do is say uh huh!?????! (nodding head slowly) Thanks sweet poet of the south. You are adored and cherished. Pilgrimage-Simply beautiful works for me and I thank you dearly. |
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Dee Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330Queensland, Australia |
Mark, such beauty seems to just flow from your pen. And don't bother denying it either! This is so touching. Dee Stand straight and tall, not the reflection as others see you, but as you truely are. Clearwater |
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Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850In the space between moments |
Oh Mark...gorgeous. Especially your two closing lines. I've missed seeing your writing, so make sure to keep it up. Truly a pleasure to read, as always, my friend. *Krista Knutson* |
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Duncan Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455 |
Mark Get up real quietly and slowly. Don't mean to scare ya, but there's a really big cat next to you. Just pretend you don't notice him and walk away real casually. I’ll go to puppy class…if Tracey will go to cooking class |
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Kitty** Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 428Charlottesville,VA USA |
I can't find the words to properly credit you for this!I'm stunned! I'll just say..Great !! Kitty |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Dee- I don't think I could deny anything to you and get away with it so I will say thank you from the bottom of my heart and leave it to the sheepish grins. Krista-Thank you so much and I too have missed your words. Guess what I have in a frame with a "REAL" autograph. LOL Duncan - ROFLMBO at your watchful eye, but didn't anyone ever tell ya that cowboys don't get scared. She (Lydia) was around 125 lbs and 8 months old in this pic. That was in January. Guess how BIG she is now. LOL Thanks for the visit and for watching after my back. Kitty-Thank you so much for those words and sometimes being stunned is a good thing. I am glad you enjoyed it. |
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BloomingRose Member Elite
since 2000-08-09
Posts 3092Florida |
Exquisite writing. Another one for my library! btw~ great picture of you. Deb |
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Goodknight Member Elite
since 2002-06-15
Posts 2386Ohio, USA |
excellent poetry - powerful images - well written - thanks - Paul |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
I'd heard the term "exquisite agony" before, but wasn't sure what it meant... With your vivid imagery and wonderful rhyme, you've painted the definition. The poem is beautiful, Mark... and the pic is great! *S* |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
(big hugggsssssss) Oh Mark, this is soooooo beautiful, sweet friend, I couldn't help but cry reading this because I am hoping with all my heart I can finally meet my dream girl Joanna this summer and I dream ever so much of walking on the beach with her hand in hand and showing her how special she is and how I know she will always have a friend deep in her heart! (sigh) This is lovely, sweet friend, BRAVO, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Mark, thank you for sharing! May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
Mark...this is stronger'n acre of garlic..like your kitty too...I had a cheetah for a very long time...(and many other creatures...used to import and export reptiles and usually small wild life back in the late 60's when it was still legal... |
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BloomingRose Member Elite
since 2000-08-09
Posts 3092Florida |
A deserving front and center bump. Deb |
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Tracey Member Elite
since 2001-08-29
Posts 2808where insanity meets breeding |
Yes indeed…where is it written?? Those who love, should never have to let go. It’s so sad when they do. What a beautiful way you’ve expressed it though. By the way…that’s one cute kitty you’ve got there…a bit big though isn’t she?? What have you been feeding her??? Lol. Puppy school 101...please teacher...make Duncan stop humping those poor girls legs!!!! |
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tracie66 Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713Australia |
*sigh* Oh WOW!!! Mark this is so very beautiful, superbly written and so very touching. ~hugs~ Tracie Love is the life of the soul... |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Deb-Thank you on both accounts. I am glad you enjoyed. Paul-The thanks all go to you. suthern-Thank you very much. I do appreciate your kindness and you as always. Noah-Thank you much. Toerag-I like garlic too and I thank you much. Deb-You are a treasure and you spoil me and I thank you for that. Tracey-I feed her poets who try to make us believe YOU were in a race ROFL. Thank you very much. I appreciate your visit. tracie66-Thank you much. I always appreciate and look forward to your visits. |
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