need some help - pipTalk Forums

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

Poetry Challenge!

need some help

Miss Abagail Mannering
Member

since 1999-09-01

Posts 136
byron, il

0 posted 1999-09-02 12:55 PM

this actually a song, but i need a title and an ending to it...all comments are welcome.

*chorus*********************
They say time marches on
but the times have changed.
And that love fades out-
'cept it stays the same.
Ya work so hard
but ya still don't gain.
You sacrifice all
yet, you're still in pain.
****************************

So you work on your love,
and work for your meal.
You don't make enough-
so, beg, borrow, and steal.
You try so hard-
but let's get real...
The world doesn't care
about how you feel.

*chorus*

Now, you're down on luck
have no where to turn-
and this crazy world
don't care if you burn.
You've made mistakes
and you've tried to learn.
You search for help
but you're not THEIR concern.

*chorus*

Now, millenium's here,
it's the year 2000.
You can't hold back
the pain you are housin'

and that's all i've got...any help would be appreciated.Thank you. Miss Abagail

------------------
"Life is like an onion, we peel it one layer at a time, and sometimes we weep." (Carl Sandburg)

Systematic Decay
Senior Member

since 1999-09-15

Posts 1301
That place with padded walls and funny people in white.........

1 posted 1999-09-19 09:11 PM

If I were you, I would keep going with the millenium idea, and perhaps tie an apocalyptic element into it....by apocalypse, i don't neccissarily measn religious, it could be a personal one....

Rand al'Thor
Junior Member

since 1999-09-19

Posts 32
Rochester, NY, USA

2 posted 1999-09-22 09:06 PM

"Down and out" ?

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.