It's funny how one's mannerisms go through such a change
When one's age climbs the ladder up to "I'm a fogey" range.
There are two paths men seem to take when passing middle age
As needle nears the "empty" on the "life remaining" gauge.



One path is the complaint department - everything's gone wrong.
Complaints they don't sleep long enough - complaints they sleep too long.
A list of all the medicines that they are forced to take...
A full account of every pain they feel, ache by ache.



All talks revolve around somebody who's just passed away
Or how much fiber, iron and zinc they have to take each day.
Be sure that by the time the conversation ends, they'll say
That life was so much easier and better in their day.



The other path is proving they are still an able man.
They work their age into each conversation if they can.
"Nice Drive!", I told my golfing buddy. "That was really great!"
"Not bad", said he, "for a guy who just turned 68!"

"You want a hot dog?" "Sure", he said. "Digestive system's fine.
The doc says my chlorestorol's a perfect 109!
I get bowel movements regular as smooth as they can be.
My heart's sound as a dollar and you oughta see me pee!!!"



It's hard to hold a conversation with this kind of man.
Young guys don't talk of death and joys of going to the can.
Some elderly don't either but they can be hard to find,
The ones who have an aging body but still young of mind.

I'd like to write some more but wrists are hurting just a bit
And I can feel my back get stiff the longer that I sit.
Tomorrow, after my uncle's wake I'll write a little more..
Not bad for a guy with rheumatiz that just turned 64!!!