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JP
Senior Member

since 1999-05-25

Posts 1343
Loomis, CA

0 posted 2003-04-03 09:24 PM

The moon hangs in the sky,
glowing brightly on a summer's night.
Bats and night birds fly,
ebony angels taking flight.

Animals scurry hither and fro,
hunting and playing in darkened light.
Movements subtle and seeminly slow.
Show as garish and rapid in my sight.

Sunlight is but a memory,
now I'm chained to glorious night.
As dawn's birth breaks my reverie,
I slide quietly from its sight.

Yesterday is ash, tomorrow is smoke; only today does the fire burn.
Nil Desperandum, Fata viem invenient

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

1 posted 2003-04-03 10:16 PM

Fantastic imagery JP!
Much enjoyed peeking into 'your night'
~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
dancing with you in the summer rain~

Temptress

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-06-15

Posts 7136
Mobile, AL

2 posted 2003-04-10 05:38 PM

Ummm...
Are people blind to your talents around here? I would say so considering this only had one response when I found it. Glad I went searching. Your images...wow..

You could hurt me with your bare hands. You could hurt me using the sharp edge of what you say. JEWEL

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

3 posted 2003-04-10 06:01 PM

one of your best!

JP
Senior Member

since 1999-05-25

Posts 1343
Loomis, CA

4 posted 2003-04-10 07:08 PM

Thanks you guys, I was beginning to get a bit depressed... ya know how it is, big ego, little recognition, lots of pouting...

Yesterday is ash, tomorrow is smoke; only today does the fire burn.
Nil Desperandum, Fata viem invenient

Marshalzu

Member Elite

since 2001-02-15

Posts 2681
Lurking

5 posted 2003-04-11 04:50 AM

Wonderful imagery, thanks for sharing

Nan

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-20

Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA

6 posted 2003-04-11 09:06 AM

Stop pouting - Keep writing... It's wonderful to see you back here - Folks will figure out how good your work is... Want me to send up a smoke signal?...

Ratleader

Member Rara Avis

since 2003-01-23

Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass

7 posted 2003-04-11 09:40 AM

I'm trying to decide what draws me most about this poem -- think it's the way you combine opposites, things the reader doesn't expect to be together, when you form your images.... little things like your ebony angels, and big things like:

"Movements subtle and seeminly slow.
Show as garish and rapid in my sight."

I can absolutely see it, take in a piece of the feeling. Good work.

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

8 posted 2003-04-11 09:49 AM

Just ten more minutes hey?
Sorry, dawn breaks...

and it becomes a beautiful day...

but not to worry!
The night shall creep back in
with quiet hush
on nightengales song...

JP
Senior Member

since 1999-05-25

Posts 1343
Loomis, CA

9 posted 2003-04-11 05:37 PM

Garsh! I'm all aflutter...

you guys are very kind, thank you. (yes Nan, signal away!) I am craving input - because, to be honest, I get more inspiration from the input I receive (more inspiration leads to more work and I need to write)

Yesterday is ash, tomorrow is smoke; only today does the fire burn.
Nil Desperandum, Fata viem invenient

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