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Kellie_Cantrell
Senior Member
since 2002-05-22
Posts 1667
New York

0 posted 2003-02-17 11:43 PM


Come now darkness out of hiding,
no longer need you hide your secret.
Time is biding,
I'm trying to keep it.

Everyday I strut my stuff,
on this path of life and death.
A journey with but one end,
death, buried 6 feet under.

Secretly, you hide in the darkness,
making sure I'm left unaware of your presence.
Now you know, I know.
Are you scared?

That maybe some day the only thing,
of me left behind, will be
the journey's here that I have reflected,
right here on the web in my poetry.

Every day, Every person.
On a journey, left to find the end.
Every one reflectng in some way.
my reflective journey started on the web.




(¨`·.·´¨) (¨`·.·´¨)
  ·.¸(¨`·.·´¨)¸.·´
     *`·.¸.·´*
    Love Always
       Kellie



© Copyright 2003 Kellie M. Cantrell - All Rights Reserved
Connel
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2002-11-04
Posts 736
Florida, USA
1 posted 2003-02-17 11:53 PM


You've got my vote!

Anyone can write, But only poets can capture the heart.

Kellie_Cantrell
Senior Member
since 2002-05-22
Posts 1667
New York
2 posted 2003-02-17 11:55 PM


Thank You Connel, I apprieciate the vote!!
Connel
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2002-11-04
Posts 736
Florida, USA
3 posted 2003-02-17 11:55 PM


Wait a tick, arnt you joined up with my community?

Anyone can write, But only poets can capture the heart.

Kellie_Cantrell
Senior Member
since 2002-05-22
Posts 1667
New York
4 posted 2003-02-17 11:57 PM


Yes I am the url hasn't been working today! Is the forum down?


--oops never mind i was typing it in wrong.

[This message has been edited by Kellie_Cantrell (02-17-2003 11:59 PM).]

Local Parasite
Deputy Moderator 10 Tours
Member Elite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527
Transylconia, Winnipeg
5 posted 2003-02-18 02:46 PM


Kellie, I very much like this... I think it really captures the essence of "reflection," by jumping right to the end of your life and glancing back from there.  Six feet under, what's going to exist of you other than your poetry?

You know, I've felt exactly the same way, and thought exactly the same thing.  On the bus on the way home, I have the most time to think.  I haven't even gotten my license yet, 'cause I don't think I could do without reflective bus rides... anyways... just the thought that when we die, there might be nothing left of us.  But we immortalize ourselves in poetry, and we can only hope that what we write will outlive us.

Shakespeare has no idea how influencial he's become.  But we can only assume that he, like us, dreamed of someday inspiring the hearts of people long after his death.

I think this poem deserves a lot of credit, Kellie.  To be very honest (I see your critique flag is up), I think you should rewrite/remove the last line, it's a bit weak compared to the rest of the poem.  No pressure though... I'm still casting my vote in your favour, even if you don't take my advice.

Parasite

"Faith" means the will to avoid knowing what is true.
~ Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Kellie_Cantrell
Senior Member
since 2002-05-22
Posts 1667
New York
6 posted 2003-02-19 12:54 PM


Thank You
Justbleu
Member Elite
since 1999-08-31
Posts 3329
Oregon, Originally From Alaska :)
7 posted 2003-02-20 09:14 AM


Dark and true!!!!

Bridgette

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
8 posted 2003-02-20 09:22 AM


Places like passions give us all something to reflect on
Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

9 posted 2003-02-20 11:51 PM


your poetry will transcend the web and time and always be a true reflection of your spirit.
lovely writing Kellie.

"Trees are poems that the earth writes upon the sky ...
We fell them down to turn them into paper that we may record our emptiness."

K.Gibran


Jamie
Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168
Blue Heaven
10 posted 2003-02-21 04:58 PM


Enjoyed the read--will look good in print.

There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar.
byron

garysgirl
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Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
11 posted 2003-02-21 05:09 PM


Kellie, this one will look good in Reflections...

"Love makes the world go around"
~with love and hugs from Ethel GG~  
                  

aries_luv_ppl
Senior Member
since 2001-09-20
Posts 1448
Universal Mind
12 posted 2003-02-22 11:42 AM


Nice.

~Every girl has a dream within.

Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
13 posted 2003-02-22 12:37 PM


I like this.
vlraynes
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...
14 posted 2003-02-26 12:48 PM



Nicely penned, Kellie.  I enjoyed this.

"...until you have read the verse on his heart,
you have not truly met the poet.
~vlraynes

Lighthousebob
Member Elite
since 2000-06-14
Posts 4725
California
15 posted 2003-02-26 01:25 AM


I've heard of reflecting on the past, but I felt that this was a good poem of reflecting on the future.... I like how you but death here in the spot light.  Good job.

-Bob

Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
16 posted 2003-02-26 01:35 AM


Good thinking poem Kellie!
EagleScorpion
Senior Member
since 2000-03-08
Posts 1644
Here, Now, Forever
17 posted 2003-03-04 11:00 PM


It alllll started on the web!!!!!!!!!!!!! i vote vote voted 4 you i did did i did
WhiteRose
Member Elite
since 2002-07-23
Posts 3208
somebody's dungeon
18 posted 2003-03-15 07:57 PM


I like it
Mysteria
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Member Laureate
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
19 posted 2003-03-16 04:11 AM


Well everyone starts a reflective journey somehow (mine was in a forest actually), but the web is good enough place to start especially when it is through poetry.  Well done.

           
R.E.S.P.E.C.T.
Aretha Franklin  

Kellie_Cantrell
Senior Member
since 2002-05-22
Posts 1667
New York
20 posted 2003-07-13 04:09 AM


i think my journey is going well now that i found the path again
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