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Open Poetry #19
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Sleep
| Open Poetry #19 |
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Sleep |
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Duncan Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455 |
Sleep the luxury of infants, cats and harlequin I can’t afford it and I really miss the dreams |
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| © Copyright 2002 Duncan - All Rights Reserved | |||
Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Duncan - I had to read this, because it was the primary concern on my mind after I finished posting my own poem.  heheI always have liked these short, clever poems... such as senryu, tanka, haiku, what have you... because they leave a lot of gaps to be filled in by the reader. And their topic and point is usually very loose and relatable. Sleep, for example. Most people sleep, right? Your organization made me a bit pleased with this piece. I do think your title is a bit predictable (despite the fact that it snagged me), because it is the first line of the poem as well as the title... which is a bit of an overdone notion. You might want to reconsider your choice of title, or maybe remove the word from the poem, in order to give the title more importance. The luxury, of infants, cats and harlequin... now I did like this... it's a somewhat unusual (envious) look at creatures who sleep by habit. The inclusion of "harlequin" in the mix brought a smile to my lip, by the way... a great addition to the other two. Now when you get into the second half of it, I almost wonder if you mean "sleep" to be a metaphorical concept in this poem? With "I really miss the dreams," I'm lead to believe that sleep is symbolic for childhood or a past state of life. Perhaps by "sleep," the poem means to say "the days when I would sleep peacefully." Is that accurate? I'm taking a shot in the dark here. Still, it was fun to read and think upon. Whap me if I'm reading too much (or too little) into this.  ~Allan All images begin in mirrors and end inside our subconsious. |
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Marshalzu 
since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681Lurking |
I loved reading this poem, thank you for sharing it  Andrew "The pin didn't drop it came and crashed down" |
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Silver Streak Member Elite
since 2002-01-02
Posts 3625FL, USA |
Duncan, I am not awake Am I now dreaming of you Asleep though awake? ((Duncan)) -newell Sharing God's Love through perfectlovepoetry.com |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
I can't afford it and I really miss the dreams ======================= sometimes its a matter of our money aint no good On those nights where we cant beg, borrow, or steal a wink...I am always grateful for the inspiration in place of the dreams... Ive always said sleep seemed like such a waste of poetry time Duncan....how do you go so darn deep with such a short casting line? *L* waaay cool. You never knew what I loved in you, |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
if we do not sleep and we do not dream how can we then escape? I liked this Cowboy |
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Siofra
since 2000-09-28
Posts 551State of Suspended Passion |
I believe I loved this one, and Allan's thoughts on it made me smile. They also made me think. First hand, I get just a small longing for indulgence in something we all have to fight for these days. Loved this! "My ears have not yet drunk a hundred words |
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Nightshade
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
Duncan - Sleep eludes us all at one time or another. I really liked this. Chris signature--> Life is not measured by breaths you take, but by moments that take your breath away. [This message has been edited by Nightshade (03-13-2002 02:45 PM).] |
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Interloper
since 2000-11-06
Posts 8369Deep in the heart |
Well concieved. I loved it! |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (big hugggssssss) Awwwwww, this is so very sad, sweet friend, I love to sleep, because I love to dream and I believe we all nee dour dreams close to our hearts to go on and embrace each new day with hope and a smile! (sigh) My heart goes out to you, sweet friend, we all wish you the sweetest dreams everyday, we all love you so mcuh! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Duncan, thank you for sharing!   May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Duncan~ I, for one, am glad sleep eludes you~ Gorgeous nightly pennings~ *Hugs* ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
I'm still trying to believe my dreams are reality and my reality a nightmare. Seems like a problem, hm? Like this,Duncan. Sandra |
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strbbux Member Elite
since 2001-12-19
Posts 3859 |
Duncan, I liked this and it is timely for me, I would treasure some good sleep right now. Life has been hectic. and I love to dream, in color yet. nice write. floria Floria |
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RMW Senior Member
since 2001-03-21
Posts 1424 |
Well put, Duncan, well put. Bob |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Very very nice Duncan. Enjoyed! ~Hugs, Nancy~ ~Somewhere in my heart I'm always |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
enjoyed |
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