Poetic Haven |
embroidery to exactness |
Elizabeth Cor Senior Member
since 2000-10-13
Posts 879Over the river and through the woods |
i awoke 2am exactly the wind a song of vampires, zephyrs thick like water eddy over the skin and i answered the call to wander inside the warmth and shadows touch a bare mind to this worry of mine for awhile and you may know only the exaggerated face, enormous metaphors and extravagant language to place against what drives or inspires or moves but if you think i can fill my endless leaves of paper with any careless infatuation or focus how sorely mistaken there is power, a compulsion cum might which may not ever touch the fleshy bands of heart beneath another chest but know, how rare the stirring to write, to fall from dreams and trace the long lines of sleeping streets in and out of obscurity both for the pull of a weight (curled like a child to every thought, clasping, breathing softly) that seems to mix in my blood until simple existence itself is heavy heavy, but not cruel imaginings stretched against the sky, i thumb out Venus, reach as though my hands will prick the tiny star like a needle, same as my feet lead me home: subliminal yearn for a space where i will find you this ache is pure, without remorse or the bleaching defeat of a relationship broken the feel of something good gone but not lost not lost, but feeling as far from my touch as the dust of stars overhead again, with you, i have earned a new emotion: grief. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
but know, how rare the stirring to write, to fall from dreams =========================== this ache is pure, without remorse or the bleaching defeat of a relationship broken the feel of something good gone but not lost not lost, but feeling as far from my touch as the dust of stars overhead again, with you, i have earned a new emotion: grief. ===================================== and it will be your new muse too..that is inevitable ... but so very very necessary... (part of the process) ... in light of our conversation, one verse in this beautiful outpouring spoke to me... the feel of something good gone but not lost never lost...not so long as we touch the "traces left behind." This (grief) may be " new to you" ... but in your own words...by your own words... I know you already understand. heart-hugs dear poetess. jm |
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Elizabeth Cor Senior Member
since 2000-10-13
Posts 879Over the river and through the woods |
jm... hi. you know that letter that's in my inbox that's still waiting on a reply? yep. its' remembered often lol... and I don't know if I'm ever going to come up with something I find "suitable" to say... but when the words come (even inadequate ramblings) I'll send them... ~smile~ thank you for rushing in and giving this quiet little night-poem your attention... and let me say that I'm tenderly impressed by your constant genuine nature and warmth to each poet here... hugs, back & thanks ever so much... you are one of few that make this a great place to be, know that. |
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Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136Mobile, AL |
Just why the hell is this at the bottom I wonder. You know...this spoke to me..LOUDLY and this particular part jumped out at me mostly because I identify with some part of it somehow or another and because its all damn good writing anyways. "...both for the pull of a weight (curled like a child to every thought, clasping, breathing softly) that seems to mix in my blood until simple existence itself is heavy..." Damn! You do this well. ' " "two hearts will build the foundation for one point of light |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I wanted to highlight every line of this---o m'lady, where have you been? Thanks Jenn, for throwing this one in my oblivious face. Reading this was like running my fingers through silken thought. Extraordinary. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
to write, to fall from dreams ~*~ Elizabeth, your critique encourages your readers to "be mean". I have a hard time with being mean. It's just not in me. If you don't mind, I will just say that this particular line touched me, and stands alone. Thanks! |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Liz, As they say, bloody marvelous. Me |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
ain't she grand? I just adore her... |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
Awed, here *bows* ~wranx In reply to "which way do we go?", the answer was never "straight", but, "progressively forward". |
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