Perilous Canyons - pipTalk Forums

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

A Whisper's Caress
Senior Member

since 2000-11-03

Posts 791
on the horizon of a fairytale

0 posted 2002-01-25 12:30 PM

Carefully stepping on broken ground
as not to fall through the cracks
she timidly tiptoes on the edge of hopelessness

as a girl she would leap in great stride
over such canyons of darkness and look
back in laughter at the danger they presented

one day, having missed her objective, she
plunged to the depths of peril as he grabbed
hold of her with marked depravity

scratching and clawing her way up sheared rock
she pulls herself to safety, bedraggled and beaten,
where she licks her wounds

as dawn breaks a new light
she stands, overlooking the canyon and
vows…never again.

Duncan
Member Ascendant

since 2001-08-07

Posts 5455

1 posted 2002-01-25 04:14 PM

Wow. Annie, THIS is amazing! Truly one of the best pieces I've read here at PIP. So much intensity and raw emotion in such a compact poem.
I love how you put this line...'one day, having missed her objective'. This is a remarkable work.

Kethry
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-07-29

Posts 9082
Victoria Australia

2 posted 2002-01-25 04:23 PM

A Whisper's Caress,
Wow! Potent words you have in the mix and the images painted leave me speechless.
Write on!
Kethry

Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind. Unknown

Magnus

Member Laureate

since 2001-10-10

Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA

3 posted 2002-01-25 08:27 PM

I guess I could put it all in one short
statement....Ditto!!!!....I agree with
the other opinions...very powerful and
short piece...

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

4 posted 2002-01-25 08:32 PM

(sigh) Sooooooooo poignant and powerfully expressed, sweet friend, may she forever spread her wings from now on and soar above hopelessness and embrace the sunny skies over the canyon to freedom and happiness! (kiss on cheek) This is marvelous, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Annie, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

A Whisper's Caress
Senior Member

since 2000-11-03

Posts 791
on the horizon of a fairytale

5 posted 2002-01-25 09:57 PM

gosh...thanks. I geuss you could say I had an exposed nerve when I wrote this.
I DO appreciate the comments and Noah, the kind thoughts are always welcome, thank you.

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.