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Open Poetry #18

Downstream

mauddib
Member

since 2002-01-12

Posts 119
melbourne australia

0 posted 2002-01-21 04:43 AM

Just when beauty escapes me,
and love is a stranger in a barren land.
I spy a rose.
A rose by no other name.
That tames a wild heart and ignites the flame.

Burn bright oh fledgling love!
Let not the storms
from rainy days past,
Rob the infant flame of its heat.
Let us warm to the flicker,
In the place where souls meet.
Hand in hand,
Heart in heart,
Colliding in a rhapsody of sparks,
As the wide eyed Heaven children laugh,
At the making of stars,
That only wise men follow.

Stay close on the trail,
As we journey through a forest of fairytales,
That you are never too old to greet.
And read it to me again and again my love.
For I am couched on the soft pillow of your voice,
And I am home atlast,
Leaving the raging torrent to grapple with its task,
Way,
Way,
Downstream.

Professor Gloom
Member Elite

since 2000-07-23

Posts 3082
of Depression

1 posted 2002-01-21 06:11 AM

Some very nice expression here,
But if you are going to take inspiration from the bard,
You should attempt to maintain a better meter.

Gloom

Startime
Member Ascendant

since 2000-10-03

Posts 5918
Canada

2 posted 2002-01-21 08:27 AM

I love it just the way it is...It feels like the beginnings of love...not totaly sure of itself but willing to give it your all...BRAVO!!!! I love the whole feel and vision of this poem. **big hugs**

More please. I love to read about people falling in love.

Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams.

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