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Open Poetry #18
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Black Veil
| Open Poetry #18 |
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Black Veil |
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sodpossom Senior Member
since 2001-06-15
Posts 723N.C |
A long black veil hides her face all alone in a dark secluded place Yesterday the veil was in her closet A perfect life and then she lost it Thoughts as black as her veil a prisoner of her own cell Tears lost in her disguise stealing the beauty of her eyes She awaits the remover of this black veil but time has hammered it down like a nail A hidden beauty disguised and wasted Unable to remember how a sweet kiss tasted So she wanders the streets in her long black veil Her ageing body growing weaker and fraile On a dreary night with the veil still draped across her face Her journey completed,the veil is lifted when she meets him at this resting place |
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| © Copyright 2002 Stevie Houston - All Rights Reserved | |||
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OWG Member
since 2001-03-19
Posts 155California |
SP....dug the iron bleak of this...and yet the hope of another side well done |
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Morcastlin Member
since 2002-01-14
Posts 244The Jersey Shore, USA |
This had such a melancholy tone to it! Sort of sad and ponderous... I liked it very much! It had a nice rhyme and flow to it. ;o) |
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Marsha
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
Stevie darling boy this is without doubt one of your utter best, the descriptive way of your lines is utterly superb darling boy. You really are getting to be soooooooooo good. The flow is utterly excellent. I could see her wandering the streets. I love the whole poem but these lines are amazingly good She awaits the remover of this black veil but time has hammered it down like a nail A hidden beauty disguised and wasted Unable to remember how a sweet kiss tasted What can I say except this is utterly wonderful.    Love and warm stuff As always Mushy To give light to them that sit in darkness..... to guide our feet into the way of peace St John ch2 v1 |
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N orth Carolina Girl Senior Member
since 2001-12-04
Posts 962NC,USA |
Stevie,this was so good.I guess she wasn`t happy until she was back with the one she loved.   Love,  Mama |
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Mistletoe Angel 
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (tears fall down my cheeks) So very sad but well-written, sweet friend, this had me flooding in tears to feel the lost love of her heart, and I pray that she can soon find peace and hope for new love! (big hugggsssss) So sad but wonderful, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet friend, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Sodpossom, Well done, enjoyed the read. |
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strbbux Member Elite
since 2001-12-19
Posts 3859 |
Sodpossom, this was so sad, and yet she does meet up with him in death.. this was a great write. floria |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
what a moving poem, so sorrowful and yet.....the end is somewhat hopeful Kathleen--(Kay) |
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True Reflections Member
since 2001-12-04
Posts 143Ohio, USA |
Stevie, Come towards the light my son! Turn away from the dark side Luke! What a lifeless shudder this conjures in my mind. I like this poem very much, just surprised that you wrote something this dark. One snow storm in North Carolina and the world gets turned upside down. Roger |
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His Poet Senior Member
since 2001-12-18
Posts 750 |
Stevie, dear sir, your poetry is stunning. This is one of your best that I've had the privilege to read. My mother-in-law fit this to a tee. I think the moment she closed her eyes in death were probably her most happy since she so missed her husband. Well done! Cheryl |
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Startime Member Ascendant
since 2000-10-03
Posts 5918Canada |
How heartbreakingly sad...sometimes the waiting is so very hard...in the end she was finally in the arms of the one she loved...that is the hope I saw in this poem. Very powerful and touches the heart deeply. **big hugs**  Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams. |
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Sunset Member
since 2002-01-08
Posts 80 |
Very clear, concise images in this. Excellent writing! |
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sodpossom Senior Member
since 2001-06-15
Posts 723N.C |
OWG Thanks for reading and checking it out! Morcastlin Thanks for the kind words! Marsha Thanks!That really means alot coming from you! |
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sodpossom Senior Member
since 2001-06-15
Posts 723N.C |
Mama She finally found piece and happiness. Noah Thank you for your kind words! Seymore Thanks for reading! |
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Pilgrimage Member Elite
since 2001-12-04
Posts 3945Texas, USA |
Dear sp, This brought the song to mind so strongly, "She walks these hills in a long black veil, she visits my grave when the night winds wail" Good one. Nan |
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sodpossom Senior Member
since 2001-06-15
Posts 723N.C |
Strbbux We have to have that hope. Irish Rose Thats all we can hope for is a happy ending. Roger I don't know what has happen to me.Kind of scary. |
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Canuckster Member
since 2002-01-09
Posts 285New Mexico, USA |
Haunting images and feelings in this one. |
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sodpossom Senior Member
since 2001-06-15
Posts 723N.C |
Nan Thats where I got the idea from.I'm a big Lefty fan! |
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sodpossom Senior Member
since 2001-06-15
Posts 723N.C |
Cheryl Thank you so much! |
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sodpossom Senior Member
since 2001-06-15
Posts 723N.C |
Startime I have known a few people like this and I can see their struggle.Thanks for reading! |
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sodpossom Senior Member
since 2001-06-15
Posts 723N.C |
Sunset Thanks for the kind words! |
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N orth Carolina Girl Senior Member
since 2001-12-04
Posts 962NC,USA |
Stevie,I just I would stop back by and read it again.  Love, Mama |
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Pilgrimage Member Elite
since 2001-12-04
Posts 3945Texas, USA |
Dear sp, Right before I read this one I was listening to George Strait sing 'It's not right, but Lefty's gone'. That song makes me want to dance and cry at the same time. I wish I could write like that.  Nan |
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