Open Poetry #17 |
Sailor Boy |
Streen Member
since 2001-11-28
Posts 169 |
A sailor boy was I, as we drifted through the sea, my captain said not to fear, the north star ‘twould us lead. As saline mists clogged the sails, foam frothed forth upon the prow, For a sailor boy was I, standing betwixt the captain and the compass guiding he, Not yet sure where we headed, But sure of that green sea, A salted spring beneath. A depressing fact that was, that salted the waters would be, as sprayed upon the ship, Neptune's misted briny sea. Often clouds might bring a shadow over the sky so all a poor sailor lad had, was the brackish waters beneath. Boil in cauldrons we had, when parched our throats became, to purify the salty water, Left the grime and grit behind. But still the drink was not the same, As pure a drop of mountain spring. Then one day atop the sails, up on the vaulted heights, I saw a glittering atop a wave, apart from the brackish green, apart from the rest of the seas. Down the twisted ropes I slid, To reach into the upmost crest, and there atop my dirtied finger, I caught a drop of water unsalted, a purity among the saline debris. Amidst the briny sea so green, Sparking atop my finger, A diamond in all the sea and sky, And no longer a mere Sailor boy was I. -------------- I appreciate critiques if'n you might bestow them. ^_^ Thankee. |
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© Copyright 2001 Derek Benz - All Rights Reserved | |||
Startime Member Ascendant
since 2000-10-03
Posts 5918Canada |
*sigh* what is to say to this poem. The vision and the passion of it is so clear. Such wonder that a single drop created such awe. Magnificent writing. I was lost in the vision you painted. **Hugs** Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams. |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
(sigh) Oh Streen, what a wonderful poem this is! (sigh) Your experiences as a sailor shine in this wonderful poem that makes me feel as though I'm in the boat with you and hitting the high seas! (sigh) We all love you so very much, sweet friend, your talent amazes me! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Streen, thank you for sharing! May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton |
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Streen Member
since 2001-11-28
Posts 169 |
*is really just 17 years old, has never been on an extended trip on the sea in the leastest* Hehe. |
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peaches73533 Senior Member
since 2001-11-04
Posts 981OK, USA |
You tell a story that draws me in. Peaches |
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emily Member
since 2000-10-03
Posts 142USA |
It does my heart good to know that you will have much to write of during your life! Never stop. Emily |
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