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Open Poetry #17
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The Train - Marge's Challenge
| Open Poetry #17 |
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The Train - Marge's Challenge |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion 
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Looking back over the wasted years that denied what could have been, She thought about the dreams she’d had, and how they’d died back then. She thought about the constant fear that defined her life of pain, She sighed in grief, but dared not aloud, because all of that remained. She thought about the man she’d met, those painfilled years ago, The handsome man who consumed her life, who set everything aglow. She thought about his flaring temper when things didn’t go his way, And her confidence that he would change after their wedding day. Didn’t he say “I love you,” and that he would change this time? Didn’t he say, “Never again,” there was no reason for her crying? And didn’t he keep his word until his temper would flare again? Didn’t he deserve a second chance, despite the many there had been? And so she married the angry man, but his temper did not wane, Instead he grew more violent with every passing day. But still she stayed, the faithful wife, as her daughter within her grew, The only reason for her life, and the only happiness she ever knew. The daughter grew into the woman her mother once had been, Her flaxen hair and azure eyes gained the attention of many men. But her daughter fell for a man like Dad, the only difference was their years, And judged her mother’s urgent misgivings as a simple woman’s fears. Didn’t he say “I love you,” and that he would change this time? Didn’t he say, “Never again,” there was no reason for her crying? And didn’t he keep his word until his temper would flare again? Didn’t he deserve a second chance, despite the many there had been? Her daughter’s wedding day arrived and fear consumed the mother’s heart, She barely had the strength to stand when she heard “The Wedding March.” But when her daughter passed by her pew, her mother’s heart couldn’t stand the strain She stepped behind her daughter and husband, and that’s where she remained. Her daughter stopped, looked over her shoulder, her eyes desperate and confused, And said, “Please Mama, I really need this man, and I know he needs me, too.” But her mother responded with steel in her voice, “I’ll not see this mistake again,” “So please don’t ask of me, dear daughter, ‘Mama, get off that train.’” The father raised his angry voice, since it had always worked before, “Mama, get off that train, or I swear I’ll knock you to the floor!” But there she stood with her back straight, the fire burning out the pain, “I love my daughter far too much to ever get off her train.” Then the mother turned to her daughter, and in the silence growing there, Her daughter saw the road she would travel, and the years of long despair. Then, turning with rising tears, she embraced her Mama and cried, And then the two held hands and walked up the aisle and then outside. Nobody’s sure where Mother and daughter went after that eventful day, All that’s known is they packed their clothes and moved somewhere far away. And of the father and the groom, they still hear the mother’s refrain, “I love my daughter far too much to ever get off her train.” [This message has been edited by LngJhnAg (edited 12-06-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 Michael Waterman - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
BRAVO, Mike!!! That title almost dictates that any poem with it would have to be comedic and yet you made an excellent, serious story from it. Absolutely first-rate! (and, once again, no cats died!  ) |
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SEA 
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
you made me cry. the only difference with me is I left before my son could grow to learn how to raise his hand to a woman. Very moving poem. I hope every single woman reads this. Thanks for not making this a joke too. (((hugs)))  |
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SmartChick Member Rara Avis
since 2001-09-23
Posts 7081On A Journey To The Unknown |
This is excellent! I too left before my daughter was born so she wouldn't know what her father was like. |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
'Deer - Sometimes I need to write something that needs saying. You know what I mean, as you do the same thing. Thanks for the moral support. SEA - I hope your journey has found you happy. It isn't an easy road, but it sure beats the alternative, doesn't it? Hugs to you. |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
LongJohn~ Never would I have imagined the inspired turn-of-phrase this has taken~ You've REALLY got a great big heart~  What a poignant piece that will touch so many others~ I admire you for this quality of penning~ *Hugs* ... *Big HUGS* to you~ ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
If only all folks were smart enough to get off that train! Good work here, hon. Cor |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
SmartChick - and hence, your name. Thanks for the read. I know it was kind of long, and many people tend to skip over the long stuff. I hope all is well for you. |
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Startime Member Ascendant
since 2000-10-03
Posts 5918Canada |
*sigh* I did not learn the lesson soon enough and now my daughter lives the nightmare only the abuse is the hidden kind being emotional....I can only wait and be there for her when she can finally find the strength to leave. The cycle continues and I die inside as I watch what she endures with a smile on her face not truly seeing the damage being done. *sigh* thank you LngJhnAg...I think I will show her this poem..maybe it will make her see what my words were not able to show her. **hugs**  Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams. |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
yes, it's been a long time now. I am happy and have a very kind husband. |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
This is simply marvelous! Kathleen (Kay) |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
You've done well with a difficult subject. |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Mike, a silver post from a silver tongue...and no tongue in cheek *soft kiss*. Wonderfully written sir! Keth Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind. Unknown |
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LadySofia Member
since 2000-05-16
Posts 238FL., USA |
Whoa....this set the brakes for me! Masterful penmenship, sir! And the ending was just as it should have been. Wonderful verses! ^_^ LadySofia |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
Thank you one and all - I tried to come up with a different type of train, and the train on a wedding gown is what I meant. But, thanks to many responses, I see there are other kinds of trains that need addressing. I sincerely hope everything works out well for everybody. |
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2dalimit Member Elite
since 2000-02-08
Posts 2228Mississippi coast |
Excellent! You brought a smile from my heart instead of a laugh from the gut. A well written story. Thanks. Melton |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
I think if we were all sitting in a huge old room, and if I were to glance over at Sy, he would nudge me and say "Mike just did an epopee..." and I would look at Sy and say "yes, he did"... when you let your serious side take over, you knock many out of the water, LJA... Now, I must go find some tissue...I never have it around when I need it most... thank you for this...it's a Keeper... |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Good glory, sailor... you blew me away with this one... it is absolutely first rate!!! You know I love to pick on you and rarely miss an opportunity... but when your pen delivers something so flawless, I can only applaud and admire! |
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BSC
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-02-04
Posts 2919New York, USA |
Oh wow LJA ~ Absolutely incredible ~ from first to last. One to be read over and over. Simply ~ incredible! Bonnie |
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Lorelei54 Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 458 |
I've been out of town, but Mike has kept me up to date on his poems...I think my dau getting married helped inspire this one, but fortunately, I never was in a marriage with this kind of abuse, and as you know...Mike is a good husband too...as is his poem...sigh...I love the way you write honey. |
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sodpossom Senior Member
since 2001-06-15
Posts 723N.C |
Wonderful story in poetic form.Very nice! |
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