Open Poetry #17 |
Still Frozen in its Dangling Charm |
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Still Frozen in its Dangling Charm I can hear a child in clamoring screech next door, her words bring me to this green grass where play should be rampant. This is the place where yesterday’s children grew, leaped into burgeoning before I had a chance to savor them they grew, for time does not wait for even this mother's loving. The nasturtium’s leafing pad splays out in quenchless throng. I can feel it growing with my eyes closed. Delicate as a bubble atop her green leaf umbrella wiggles a drop of rain still from yesterday’s downpour, it is colored by sun’s rainbows making a small soft sound as it moves, as imperceptible as a drifting cloud’s sigh. The cold cement holds me where I lie in bedded backyard bliss, for listening and feeling the sun is glorious and soft and fills these fall creases like a lover’s soft breath until they are ripe and swollen. When I drink this orange of gracious giving, this juice of sweet tang, it speaks to me all the goodness of careless youthful glee that this small space encompasses, then…I long to have found time still frozen in its dangling charm. _________ a rewrite To decorate this aging |
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© Copyright 2001 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved | |||
serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I had to read THIS? After I just posted "crap"? Simply gorgeous and filled with torrents and undertows of emotion... sigh...my ego is depressed while the poet in me is filled with admiration! |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
You have a wonderful way of holding a magnifying glass to tiny moments of time, and your close observations of nature are captivating. I could almost hear yesterday's leftover rain drop as it slid off the leaf. Thank you for another peaceful moment. |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Oh Martie! It is as if you knew how much I needed this tonight. Thank you, and bless you, just for being you...and, being here, as if my magic, when I need to read your calming words. ~hugs, Nancy~ "A dream is a wish your heart makes..." |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
MartieDearMartie~ I felt the 'fruited plains of your thoughts~ 'This is the place where yesterday’s children grew, leaped into burgeoning before I had a chance to savor them they grew, for time does not wait for even this mother's loving.' 'When I drink this orange of gracious giving, this juice of sweet tang, it speaks to me all the goodness of careless youthful glee that this small space encompasses, then…I long to have found time still frozen in its dangling charm.' I love you~ *Hugs* ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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Joe Lamando Member
since 2001-11-20
Posts 124Massachusetts,USA |
Wonderous, especially the last part. I love it when you catch a reverie so nicely in a symbol or metaphor. Hugs, Joe |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Rewrite - That's OK - Then we get to enjoy the 're' as much as we did the 'write'... Simply wonderful, Martie... |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Y'know, you re-write pretty well....just a tweak here and there and a whole new poem... I'm so proud of you! |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Martie, Well you didn't freeze time but you sure slowed it down. Lovely *L* |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
I have to wonder how you think Martie? When I see this... When I drink this orange of gracious giving, this juice of sweet tang, it speaks to me all the goodness of careless youthful glee... You can take Tang (lol) and turn into the sweetest picture of words, and I truly say this with the utmost respect too. When I grow up I wish to think just one thought as Martie does. Bravo my friend! ~*~ Carpe' Diem ~*~ |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
I know that longing, Martie. You have expressed it so beautifully! |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
This is the place where yesterday’s children grew, leaped into burgeoning before I had a chance to savor them they grew, for time does not wait for even this mother's loving. The cold cement holds me where I lie in bedded backyard bliss, for listening and feeling the sun is glorious and soft and fills these fall creases like a lover’s soft breath until they are ripe and swollen. Absolutely gorgeous m'friend I've missed reading you! Maree |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
A magnificent title... followed by an even more magnificent write... What a gift you have and how lucky I am to have read this one... WOW Regards, m'friend, Sudhir |
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