Weird Mood Poetry or Boxing Me

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Temptress

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-06-15

Posts 7136
Mobile, AL

0 posted 2001-10-02 10:13 PM

I'm
over...........................here
cowering in this corner of myself tonight.
Please don't give me your hand.
I don't want it.
Did you know I'm scared in all my boldness?
but
shhhhhhh
That isn't the only way I am
and right now I'm over....................here
while the rest of me fights over who is going to be me next.
SLAP
"Get back over there in the corner!"
excuse me!
That was my openess trying to escape again.
People are getting to close
and this
tiny
box
is getting crowded.
PLEASE!
Stop r e a c h i n g for me!
Did you know I'm scared in my boldness?
SHHHHH!!
You weren't supposed to tell.
SLAP
back in my corner.
Stuffed back in my box.
I'm not letting me out right now.
You're demanding too much
and I don't want to get close to you.

Sometimes the heart needs the solace of solitude and silence.

Marq
Member

since 1999-10-18

Posts 222

1 posted 2001-10-02 10:47 PM

This is kind of different for you! It scares me a little to read it to be honest.
When you write like this it makes me feel like crawling into my box.

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

2 posted 2001-10-02 11:25 PM

Temptress--I like this..so interesting poem, for I have squared off with myself a few times and I think you have written it well!

Balladeer

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-05

Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

3 posted 2001-10-03 12:00 PM

I think we all have times we want to hide in that box, Jenn. This is one of your best, in my humble opinion......

Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

4 posted 2001-10-03 09:01 AM

nicely done... it is in the struggles to decide which "me" to be next that we grow... do we leave the safety of one corner to find another...or so we hide beaten in the one we feel safest in? Nice form and as always an interesting read...

personally.... I think the act of opening up is difficult for so many of us...and the fears of making mistakes, of being hurt slaps us around quite a lot at times. I think however, you have too much to offer to stay hidden...and when the time is right, will know that...

Sven

Member Laureate

since 1999-11-23

Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA

5 posted 2001-10-03 07:36 PM

yes, we do want (and dare I say need) to be alone sometimes. . . but, we have to be careful not to let that box lid close. . .

great job with this one. . . I really like the concrete elements that you used here too. . . gives a better idea of being in that "box". . .

--------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Auguste

Member Elite

since 2000-02-16

Posts 3953
By the sea

6 posted 2001-10-03 09:54 PM

Nice work, Jennifer. This says a lot about you. We all have our little boxes, it would seem.

Michael

Michael Auguste~
There is more depth to the heart than the mind can comprehend and it only has boundaries when we choose to fence it in.

boardman
Junior Member

since 2000-05-09

Posts 44

7 posted 2001-10-03 11:33 PM

Hi Temptress,

I like the way you put this.

I sure wish I could fight myself.
All five of me!
The problem is none of them are really here.
So where do I begin?

Keep up the great work.

Vince

Our minds are endless atoms in search of the beginning - boardman

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