»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #16
»
lost and confused
| Open Poetry #16 |
|
lost and confused |
|
|
staybellmined Junior Member
since 2001-07-29
Posts 21insanity, usa (killeen,tx) |
have you ever had the feeling that life should be more than it is felt that somethings were better left undone dreams better off fulfilled memories that should never have been welcome to the road of the lost and confused join me for a journey through the depths of my mind and see its nooks and crannies find the hollows and shadows that dweel within perhaps then you will see the demon locked inside from normal beginning to tragic ends road paved with dirt and blood and the distance too short on the feet simple birth turned sick at day three death hanging close smiling at me still I rose beyond my realm seven should have been lucky but cursed thrown in a world I'd never rehearsed too young to see the future erase and my dreams became screams as pain and rage rose to the seams and my bubble was ripe to burst I was twisted and used lost and confused stuck there for life it seemed thats where the drugs kicked in smoking weed to get away doing speed to survive the day nothing mattered and no one cared no one knew and no one dared I was locked inside my iron cage trapped by my fear and tamed by my rage disillusioned with reality and the way things were stuck with a drink too explosive to stir deadly to touch and twice more to drink held by a world that refused to think and somewhere in that foggy mist that held my reality in check I found the one I wanted yet never knew the one I can't let go of no matter what I do and it eats me apart like an apple on the ground hollowed inside and mocked all around the only one out there devoid of the touch and memories of a life I wanted so much yet the truth of reality stays hard and cold too young to fade out, too quick to be old yet I'm racing to the end of my days I'm running to fast to live long and prosper the road I'm on is worn to its ends and nothing can stop me now for the end will come sooner than later and the prospects of death loom near cause I push life to it's limits in so many ways I've been lost and confused for too many days and the stories and pains still drag on from evening dusk till morning dawn I lost her because of the fool I still am too many things to know what to damn not one day goes by I don't think about her and the torture causes the tears to stir from a place I've fought and killed every day yet still stays there alive some way and I denied myself completely for years thinking it was only horse **** and fears but I still feel her to this very day I hear her voice and the words she would say and I'm tripped and slashed to the extreme would some body please wake me from this dream it's torture unending I've got to escape it's closer to sodomy and mentally rape I'm powerless and lost, twisted and used trapped in a cage for myself to abuse with war inside me how can I cope? I've no stairway, no door, no rope nothing but the drugs I use to float away and those get more expensive every day as I'm stuck in a world I tried to create a world which every day I wake up and hate leave me alone and let me go free let me be the one you made me to be and yet I see the end come near and as it approaches I have no fear I'm ready and willing, yet able I'm not stuck in the life that's held in a knot and its holding me here on the jagged end one little nudge and over I will send the last little bit of my life still here and that will be killed by nothing I fear so I'm hanging around in darkness and shame naked before those who know my real name in a world that burns and tears at my skin at a world that has me, trapped within..... "As the sun and each atom of ether is a sphere complete in itself, yet at the same time only a part of a whole too vast for man to comprehend, so each individual bears within himself his own purpose, yet bears it to serve a general purpose unfathomable to man." Leo Tolstoy "War and Peace" |
||
| © Copyright 2001 James - All Rights Reserved | |||
Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
Maybe a bit lost, but I don't think you are confused. I have more to say, but must step away for awhile. Talk to you later. |
||
|
NapalmsConstantlyConfused
since 2001-05-15
Posts 529 |
hmmmmm. i can feel this, it comes through very clearly, although i think it might have found a better fit in dark passions... i can only say "this too shall pass." good writing, i'd like to see more of your work. this is good. -Napalm I Love The Smell Of Napalm In The AM! |
||
|
doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
aaahhhhhhhhhhh there's a Poet amongst us!!!!!! speak it loud! i hear you! |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
