Open Poetry #16 |
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He Drinks, Therefor He Isn’t |
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Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
There he drinks, Within the haze he now hides, He won’t be, He can’t see That he’s in a downward slide, He still drinks. Drink by drink He exchanges himself there, Out pouring In pouring, And no one really does care, Slowly done, Wasting away one by one. People there used to insist That he had so much promise, But t’was before the drinking Before he stopped his thinking, Now he drinks. He’s changed so much that gives pause, Against all sanity’s cause, All has slipped to his belly, That’s “A bowl full of jelly” Now he drinks. Line them up and knock them down The promise man can’t be found, One by one he fades away, Drinks all night and sleeps all day. Gloom |
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© Copyright 2001 Aszard Drazlom - All Rights Reserved | |||
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
"the promise man can't be found"... I read this two ways....and both ways strike hard. Well done, Sir! |
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Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
Thank you, Sunshine, Glad you liked it either way you read it. Gloom |
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Cpat Hair![]()
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
nicely done Gloom.... an interesting read with a good ending... you practice your craft well my friend. |
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Startime Member Ascendant
since 2000-10-03
Posts 5918Canada |
*sigh* My heart goes out to him. It is a terrible way to live. You tell it very well in this well written poem. Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams. |
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Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
Thank you, Cpat Hair, I am pleased my crafting gives you enjoyment. Thank you, Startime, It’s the choice he’s made, To hide from himself and reality, Glad you liked this. Gloom |
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1slick_lady Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088standing on a shadow's lace |
i know someone like this you have painted the picture very well it is hard to watch them throw their lives away drink by drink never knowing how the hurt themselves and the ones that love them until it is too late |
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Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
Thank you, 1slick_lady, The real problem is that they never see it themselves Till they finally wake in the gutter, A life trashed. Gloom |
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Zinsser Senior Member
since 2001-02-27
Posts 1641Calif. |
very well done..... |
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Midnitesun![]()
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
My daddy was a runaway, the bottle was his home. No one understood him, but too late, maybe me. These are song lyrics I wrote many years ago, but never posted or shared before. |
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Tracey Member Elite
since 2001-08-29
Posts 2808where insanity meets breeding |
It's such a waste when someone throws their life away to drinking. Promise wasted. I think many of us know someone like this. If she who dies with the most toys wins, then can I have some toy boys please? |
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Nightshade![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
Gloom, So well said. To me it screams,"there but for the grace of God go you or I." Chris Life is not measured by breaths you take, but by moments that take your breath away. |
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Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
Thank you, Zinsser, Thank you, Midnitesun, I am honored by your sharing Thank you, Tracey Humans are a terrible thing to waste, It’s a shameful and sinful thing to do I see too many of them in my city. Thank you, Nightshade, Pleased you liked, But I know I’ll never go there, I just wish others wouldn’t Gloom |
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Mysteria![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Excellent poem and depiction of the decay a person who is addicted to alcohol suffers. So many people with great aspirations, hopes, dreams, and promising futures could be the subjects in this poem, and that makes me sad indeed. |
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wayoutwalt Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 4870TEXAS (it's all big) |
Man don't tell the prof. but that's gonna be me tonight! Really good write i say |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
Sometimes when I read a poem that hits home like this, I tend to want to not respond in words...even if written extremely well. Just know I felt all of it. ~Wynter "The worst prison would be a closed heart". |
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