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Open Poetry #16
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Best Laid Plans...............annual Halloween repost
| Open Poetry #16 |
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Best Laid Plans...............annual Halloween repost |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA 
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She was sure her man was cheating though she didn't have a fact So she designed a plan that would help catch him in the act. There was a ball for Halloween that they were going to And she said, "Dear, I'm feeling ill and I can't go with you." He offered to stay home with her but she said, "That's alright. Just go on and enjoy yourself and have some fun tonight." So he dressed in his costume and he kissed his wife goodbye As she stood there and watched him leave with daggers in her eye. As soon as he drove 'round the bend and she was all alone She pulled a box out that contained a costume of her own. She put it on then called a cab and to the ball she went... (When someone said HELL HATH NO FURY.....THIS is what they meant!) His costume had been quite unique, specifically designed. She knew that he would stand out. He would not be hard to find. She checked the house from room to room - she opened every door Then saw her husband out there with some blonde on the dance floor! He never once had danced with her! He didn't like that stuff Yet there he was entwined around some bleach-blond piece of fluff!! He had a tall drink in his hand and acted like a fool... She wanted to just shoot him but she had to keep it cool. She walked up quite seductively and gave her man a glance. He reached and pulled her close to him as they began to dance. He ground his body into her and squeezed her half to death And she was almost overcome with liquor on his breath. He led her glance up to the bedroom on the second floor Then took her by the hand and led her through the bedroom door. She had to keep her costume on to save identity So, dressed, she lay down on the bed and, smiling, so did he. For one full hour she let him have her, hating that man so And, when he finished, she jumped up and said she had to go. So she slipped out and grabbed a cab and got home real quick... The thought of what he'd done to her had made her feel sick. A short time later he came home and slipped into the bed. Armed with a script she had prepared, she smiled at him and said, "How was the party, honey? Did you manage to have fun?" He said, "No, it was boring...." (here she wished she had a gun!) "But, sweetheart," she said coyly, "did at least you get to dance?" "With someone else besides you, hon? No, never! Not a chance!" "But surely there were pretty girls who tried to catch your eye?" "They'd waste their time", he said. "You know that I'm a faithful guy." She almost had to be restrained to not shoot him right then But, calling on the strength of gods, composed herself again. "Poor dear," she said, through gritting teeth, "it really is a crime To go to such a lavish ball and not have a good time. "Oh, well", he said, "when you're not with me I just can't have fun 'Cause I'm just a one-woman guy and you're the only one. I stood there for a little while and listened to the band And barely even sipped the drink that I had in my hand." "My buddies, Peter, John and Bill were feeling that same way So we went to the study, found cards and began to play. Going through a night without you, baby, makes me sad But the guy I loaned my costume to - WOW! What a night he had!  |
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| © Copyright 2001 Michael Mack - All Rights Reserved | |||
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sunshinemist Senior Member
since 2001-09-29
Posts 595Fl. sunshines early mist |
OH MY!! This was very cleaver of you to write. I loved it! Right to the very end, you had me under a spell. Great Job!   smiles ~Marie~ |
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The Lady of Shallot Senior Member
since 2001-10-03
Posts 818USA |
You have a fine poetic talent...a gift -befriend yourself and you will never be alone- |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Has Halloween rolled around again! Seems like you were just at the door asking for candy! Well done, 'Deer! |
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Titia Geertman Member Ascendant
since 2001-05-07
Posts 5182Netherlands |
Oh Deer oh Dear I'm grinning to my ears read it once reread it twice my face all wet from laughingtears This way of yours to tell your tales will keep me sleepless tonight but I don't mind it a bit a HUG for your delight Titia A rose is a rose is a rose...I guess... Feel free to use the pictures on my website. http://communities.msn.com/Titiasplace/ [This message has been edited by Titia Geertman (edited 10-16-2001).] |
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Startime Member Ascendant
since 2000-10-03
Posts 5918Canada |
*giggling with delight* oh my did you ever surprise me in the end. You surprised her too. LOL I LOVE IT. MAGNIFICENT!!!Only you, sweet Balladeer could come up with something like this.  Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams. |
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Tracey Member Elite
since 2001-08-29
Posts 2808where insanity meets breeding |
Boy, did he ever have a good night!!!Excellant story here, you certainly know how to put a smile on a girls face  If she who dies with the most toys wins, then can I have some toy boys please? |
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doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
rofl!!!!!!!!!!!hehe... i can't stop laughing!!! i loved it last year and i love it this year!!!! i'm sure i'll love it next year, too!! it's all in the cards, they say!! too too funny, my 'Deer!!!!   |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Oh Balladeer....you sure do know how to write these bits of 'oh so funny'...I almost...well, we'll let that part go. Great write and I loved it even if it was from last year, because I wasn't here then!! ~Halloween hugs, Nancy~ ~I've loved you forever, in lifetimes before.~ |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
UH-OH! That's what I'd call a major boo-boo! Thanks for the repost, Michael! |
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Nightshade 
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
Balladeer, Oh what a tangled web we weave....Boy, I like this one!!! Chris Life is not measured by breaths you take, but by moments that take your breath away. |
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Duncan Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455 |
Good one, Balladeer! Cracked me up. |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
I knew it! LMBO - now this was darn funny! |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
ROFL! You could post this one a few times a year, and I'd love it just as much every time Michael ... this is one of my favorites! A tale perfectly woven to build anticipation into the story ... and such a hilarious punchline .... I just love it! Best wishes, /Kit |
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Tennessee Angel Senior Member
since 2000-06-03
Posts 661Tennessee |
I'd loved this one last year and I love it even more this year! You have a creative streak that just never stops. |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
sunshinemist..I'm really glad you enjoyed! Lady of Shallot..we all just try to do our best with whatever gifts God has given us..I thank you Sunshine...well, this year I hope I get some! Thanks for reading Titia..thank you for the wonderful hug...an the sleepless night Startime...your delightful giggle is music to my ears thank you, my friend Tracey..I sure love to put one on YOURS! I thank you! Doreen....hehe...all in the cards as long as the deck has a joker!  Glad you enjoyed! Enchantress...well, hopefully you'll be here for many years to come! You are SOOOOOO nice Denise...that's what Halloween is for...boo!-boo!'s Thanks!!!! nightshade..tangled webs indeed! Just like a Net!! LOL! Thank you  Duncan...thank you for the crackup! Mysteria..I just love to make you laugh! Kit..you sweet lady! Your responses are always special to me. Thank you!! Tennessee Angel..how can I stop when I have such a wonderful place and audience that keeps me going? Thank you, angel  |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Balladeer~ Treat or TREAT ?????  *Hugs* ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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wayoutwalt Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 4870TEXAS (it's all big) |
O YUH what a riot...nice wit yuh |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Oh Lordy me! hahahaha Oh Deer, this is a fantastic write, thank you for the laugh hehehe. Love it! Maree |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Things that make me go hmmmmmm..... *S* But now you have me wondering Why this conniver couldn't tell... Did fury overwhelm her senses Block her touch and taste and smell? For a wild hour she lost inhibitions - Only later, to chagrin and shame Did she learn that she'd not noticed That her lover's touch was not the same. Perhaps she thought it was the cheating That made such a difference In hubby's modus operandus... Was it revenge that made her dense? When's the last time she faced loving As more than something she must bear? How often did she give completely Just to show her man she cared? Cheaters are heels, no question of it But I find I have to mention... She was right to be worried if she Pays him such little attention. Forgive the bunny trail I went hopping down, Deer one. *G* I love this poem and look forward to reading many more repostings. *S* It's timeless and terrific. *S* [This message has been edited by suthern (edited 10-22-2001).] |
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BrightStar Member
since 2001-04-08
Posts 219 |
Things that go bump in the night. Admiring you at Passions. |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Here is hoping that this year you get some...(candy that is). Well, maybe a little can of Spam, but you know that is just a little bit ritzy to just be handing out don't ya think? Well done and nice to see that tradition is not lost in the time of distance. |
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Lisa Member
since 1999-07-08
Posts 88Lunenburg,VT USA |
This was hilarious and served her right. Being sneaky never gets you anywhere. I loved this I laughed all the way through. |
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Zukene_Chic Member
since 2001-09-26
Posts 152Cali |
this was adorable! at the end, aat least... |
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