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**lost**
Junior Member

since 2001-07-16

Posts 32
ma

0 posted 2001-07-20 09:56 PM

i'll never learn

i have no grey or medium,
everything is to the extreme.
my emotions and my actions are based upon,
my feelings at the time.
instant gratification,
instant sorrow,
instant anger.
racing thoughts,
a neverending party inside.
once waking up,
deciding where i was,
attempting to see through the bottles of rum,
the thick clouds of smoke.
innumberable are my unrecolected nights.
only lonley flashes of still frames,
haunt the back of my mind.
i paint the rest, in unknown hues,
confused as to what im painting,
seeing who it was i kissed,
who i punched,
what i broke,
where i'd been.
when the painting has been completed,
i'll call my friends and continue again.

confused among strangers,
lost amongst myself.
**lost**

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

1 posted 2001-07-20 10:29 PM

sounds like a wild time

I had never had those nights of not remembering the next day.......unfortunately, I always remember LOL

deleeme
Senior Member

since 1999-10-09

Posts 1766
NEW ENGLAND, USA

2 posted 2001-07-20 10:33 PM

Wow, almost missed out on your own life!  I hope that in time you will be able do things in a more deliberate, knowledgable and satisfying way--until then, don'tmess up too bad!
    An illuminating read of acute introspection,
            David

Every Day's a Blessing
And Gift-Wrapped from Above,
Share it with another
And Spread the Father's Love!!!

May You come to Know His Best Blessing

JLR
Senior Member

since 2001-02-04

Posts 1785

3 posted 2001-07-21 12:34 PM

lol@SEA
You write these words as no outsider could. And you've conveyed this situation with a great amount of brutal honestly. Maybe when there's nothing left to break...change will come. I truly enjoyed your poem. Welcome to Passions!

[This message has been edited by JLR (edited 07-21-2001).]

MARK V SHELDON
Member Elite

since 2001-06-21

Posts 3015
In a corporeal internship...

4 posted 2001-07-21 02:20 PM

Well, sounds like the first of three steps have been achieved towards change: recognition of a "problem". The next two, of course, are up to the individual: desire to change, and action to cause change... A very descriptive write, Joline.

-MVS

"When you tell the Truth, you never have to remember what you just said."
--Del Casher

RosePetal

Member Elite

since 2001-08-26

Posts 2985
South Florida

5 posted 2002-02-17 03:56 PM

wild time indeed! I'm with sea on this one..i remember everything but i wish i didnt lol

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

6 posted 2003-01-12 04:57 AM

I'm there with ya! no in betweens

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