Candle Naught---my attempt at challenge

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Open Poetry #15

Candle Naught---my attempt at challenge

VAS
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-11-16

Posts 7450
Oregon

0 posted 2001-07-20 02:04 PM

Candle Naught
Virginia Salter

there they were
all those words
lying about the desk

I tried collecting them
into small piles of meaning
but there was no cohesiveness
only flat, emotionless letters
cavorting into nonsense

again I rearranged them
‘t’ words here
‘i’ words there
nouns and verbs
almost floated on air
in my frantic displacement
of their senseless lie

I brought the candle closer
tickled the flame
with my breathing
still the same
meaningless drivel
appeared in the wake
of my waves

not one thought
not one whisper
could be found to rise
out of the many heaps
before me

panic sent me for coffee
adrenaline in a cup
giving time for mesmerize
then lifted piles up
flailed them in glow of flame
to see if sparks would come
alas, my tries are over
each ounce of me is done

the fruit of these moments
have come complete to naught
one minute longer
can make no difference
to bed, to dream,
tis not worth the candle
to try to ford this stream

© July 20, 2001

Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

1 posted 2001-07-20 03:00 PM

interesting poem VAS...

I enjoyed

VAS
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-11-16

Posts 7450
Oregon

2 posted 2001-07-20 03:03 PM

thanks, Cpat, of course, it's all contrived but I think could run parallel to a writer's struggle, at times

SmittenKitten
Senior Member

since 2001-06-20

Posts 1131
where the sky and horizon meet

3 posted 2001-07-20 03:08 PM

This definitely conveys the frustration any writer inevitably comes across at times!
~Krista

"Poetry and Hums aren't things which you get, they're things which get you.
And all you can do is to go where they can find you."
~Winnie

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

4 posted 2001-07-20 07:23 PM

VAS--I throw words and letters up in the air all the time...I must try it by candle light! Enjoyed this!

VAS
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-11-16

Posts 7450
Oregon

5 posted 2001-07-20 07:27 PM

thank you Martie

this is uncanny, just as I posted a note to you about this poem in response to your splinters, I received news you'd commented on this, it was spooky as it was almost simultaneous

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