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Open Poetry #15
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Goodbye My Love
| Open Poetry #15 |
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Goodbye My Love |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
The early morning sea mist swirls around your face and the glow of dawning confirms I will remain in this place You belong to the forest, I belong near the sea and though our hearts cry out our love just cannot be Tomorrow is the day you leave our time together must end and though you have my heart I'll only call you friend If I could change the outcome and make our futures unite I would take your hand now to walk into the night But dawn is a jealous mistress she takes back the words we vowed in dark of night, our pledge of love are gone upon morning cloud |
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| © Copyright 2001 Poet deVine - All Rights Reserved | |||
Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
PoetdeVine~ 'But dawn is a jealous mistress she takes back the words we vowed' What a marvelous poetic phrase~ ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Thank you Marge, I am desperately trying to find my missing muse.....it's been almost 3 months since I wrote something new... |
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2dalimit Member Elite
since 2000-02-08
Posts 2228Mississippi coast |
I'll only call you friend... Although you two have come to an end I'm glad you two can remain friends |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
If compromise can't be met - friends forever remains... Very wise words, PdV..  |
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Zinsser Senior Member
since 2001-02-27
Posts 1641Calif. |
Sad.. yet so very beautiful.. ~Connie~ |
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Nightshade
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
"but dawn is a jealous mistress"....how true. I really enjoyed this read. Life is not measured by breaths you take, but by moments that take your breath away. |
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Tracey Member Elite
since 2001-08-29
Posts 2808where insanity meets breeding |
Oh, this is so sad. I want a happy ending to this. Let us know if somehow there is one. Lovely poem. Sad, but lovely If she who dies with the most toys wins, then can I have some toy boys please? |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
If you can write like this with a missing muse......................... this one touched me dear lady There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar. |
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The Rusty Knight Member
since 2001-08-29
Posts 414Texas |
and though you have my heart I'll only call you friend This speaks to me as the soul of the poem. Soft spoken, but it has a lot of power. This is the kind of line that would get into my head and I would have to write something around it to get it out. Death comes not when we cease to breathe, but when we cease to dream. [This message has been edited by The Rusty Knight (edited 09-06-2001).] |
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Duncan Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455 |
I once tried to melt the forest into the sea. Somethings are best left as they began. Wise when we can see that early on, though, still not easy to say goodbye to love. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Very nice Poet deVine...James |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
Beautiful sentiments Sharon! You've captured a mood of both passion and friendship through this lovely phrasing, very much enjoyed your message in this piece my friend. Best wishes, /Kit |
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Trew Member
since 2000-06-10
Posts 365Ottawa, Canada |
It was as though you were just watching over my life as it unfolded these past two weeks. I have just returned to the forest, and she to the sea. Thank you for these words. They couldn't have come at a better time. Since my pen seems somewhat dry lately, you have achieved what I only desired. Beautiful poem... and thanks again. Trev. |
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Charisma
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906lost in blue pages |
~But dawn is a jealous mistress she takes back the words we vowed in dark of night, our pledge of love are gone upon morning cloud~ Me too love that line....but dawn is a jealous mistress~ Excellent as always! Charisma |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
*perk* Ms DeVine - Yamean, if we meet and I tell you some real good lines and then things heat up and I tell you some more good lines and then things REALLY heat up, and then, later, I tell you I live in the forest, I can get away with it? MAN!!!! Why didn't you tell me this a LONG time ago? heh |
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Lady In White
since 2001-02-12
Posts 2799USA |
"Friend" can encompass so much, and better to have many wonderful friends, than one woe-begotten lover or worse yet, the lack of either... Well done PdV... |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
I think that you're beginning to find her. . . just keep going. . . little by little. . . bit by bit. . . you'll get there. . . this is a great start. . . --------------------------------------------------------- To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world. |
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Alan Senior Member
since 2000-09-12
Posts 1499right next door |
This is so sad. But at least the too of you still remain friends. The last stanza hit home for me...Great job alan |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Very sad and very touching Sharon.... But dawn is a jealous mistress she takes back the words we vowed It's great to read you again Dear Maree |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
PdV..such a sad piece...but expressed in poetic beauty...i liked it. if i die before i wake...i pray the Lord my soul to take - when thugs cry- |
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Masked Intruder
Moderator
Senior Member
since 1999-05-23
Posts 1231Near golden sunsets |
The mists of avalon conquer another. If you find your muse, send her/him my way...I've lost mine and need a replacement! *wink* You can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep. -- Navajo Proverb |
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shadow974 Senior Member
since 2001-06-21
Posts 636Michigan |
Beautifully written and sad. It happens to most of us at least once. It's just great if you can remain friends, Enjoyed. Throw your heart out in front of you |
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