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Open Poetry #15

Senyru poetry?

Temptress

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-06-15

Posts 7136
Mobile, AL

0 posted 2001-08-07 07:40 PM

Okay.
Any help on this would be greatly appreciated as I am being bold again about my work having any good form.

Vial of body ink
Naked porous skin stained red
Intimate drifting

Ponder passionate
While tickling brush strokes
Carress tan canvas

Sudden muscle move
Words stretch with quaking surface
Then collide again

Dance of wet on silk
Desire's thoughts color pores
Washable love dries

Titia Geertman
Member Ascendant

since 2001-05-07

Posts 5182
Netherlands

1 posted 2001-08-07 07:45 PM

Okay, not every middleline is 7 syllables, but hey, I think they're gorcious anyway (did I spell gorcious right?).
But I'll give it a try:

Ponder passionate
While tickling brush strokes
Carress tan canvas
---------------------------
Ponder passionate
While the tickling brushes stroke
Carress tan canvas

Dance of wet on silk
Desire's thoughts color pores
Washable love dries
----------------------------
Dance of wet on silk
Desire in thoughts color pores
Washable love dries

Nice images

Titia

A rose is a rose is a rose...I guess...
Feel free to use the pictures on my website. http://communities.msn.com/Titiasplace/

[This message has been edited by Titia Geertman (edited 08-07-2001).]

Songbird
Member Elite

since 1999-12-15

Posts 2184
Missouri

2 posted 2001-08-07 09:10 PM

It's fun to try something new isn't it. You did a good job. The images can be felt.

paladin

Senior Member

since 2001-08-05

Posts 930
Pensacola,Fl.

3 posted 2001-08-07 10:05 PM

You might enjoy haiku.Here is one of mine.

                 Glance

              No words said.
             across the room.Still,
             They speak love.

paladin

Snooganzmeister32
Member

since 2001-07-17

Posts 67
Cali, USA

4 posted 2001-08-07 10:20 PM

*hugglez* I think you did a wonderful job

Logan
Senior Member

since 2001-05-28

Posts 1641
Arkansas

5 posted 2001-08-07 11:29 PM

Ahhh, gentle one, whatever you try seems to only be better and better..good seeing you on here again, have missed you..very gentle smile

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