Valley of Fears#11 - pipTalk Forums

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Ina
Senior Member

since 2000-10-09

Posts 1236
Quebec, Canada

0 posted 2001-07-22 11:59 AM

Im nearing the end with this series. There about perhaps 3 or 4 more.

THE LIFE

I want to cry, to die
would be so nice right now
The life I have is so bleak
time spent nursing my pain
trying to hide bruises
and cuts
sweaters are my friends
nails bitten down
screams in the middle of
the night do nothing
to hide my fears or my pain
The granite floor in my
hall is my greatest enemy
walking along the dark streets
I look back over my shoulder
shiver with fear
Those hands will always scare me
Sitting in the middle of the soccer
field at 2 in the morning
when did this place get so scary?
Where did the lights go?
A cut lip swollen to a purple
rabid fear is let loose
Am I crazy?
I just want to be held
but we don't get everything
we want in life
I need the hits and bruises
to stop coming at me
one more blow to the head
will I be dead?
no.
just miserable and sore
I find comfort at the raves
hardcore drum and bass
vibrates through my body
the joy is snuffed out
and the thought of going home
when will this end?
One broken arm stops me
from skating down the verts
stops me from jumper horseshows
on fred or archie
my youth where did it go?
Where's my love when I need
him, 3000 miles away
slow steady i rise from the
water of the lac
walk in the forest
conquering my fear of darkness
my aquirring a new fear
a fear that I know i wont
survive

REgina

anonymousfemale
Member Elite

since 2000-02-02

Posts 2797
Limbo

1 posted 2001-07-23 02:29 AM

Out of all the pieces you have written, this one I connect with the most. The walking in the morning and finding refuge in raves...it's all so familiar.
"a fear that I know i wont
survive"
That is perhaps the truest part of the entire piece. It's so daunting yet so right at the same time. If you need to talk you can always email me, you know.
It was written awesomely and, like your other pieces, will find a way into my library.
Thank you for writing this. Perhaps with a piece to read, I can see everything in a bright light and know the reality and severity of the situation.

~AF~

Tearless grief bleeds inwardly.
~ Christian Nevell Bovee ~

allie
Member

since 2001-07-09

Posts 218
Australia

2 posted 2001-07-23 06:34 AM

Amazing poem,
Really strong emotions.
I really felt you/the charecters pain...

Very good post,

ALLIE

zarina
Member

since 2001-05-19

Posts 180

3 posted 2001-07-23 08:07 AM

*speechless* It's great!

I am always myself. Isn't that enough for you?

Starnite
Junior Member

since 2001-07-05

Posts 41
Wisconsin

4 posted 2001-07-23 11:05 AM

Speechless. It was great. I like that your emontions came through when I read it.

**Sarah

DarkenedShadow
Member

since 2001-07-23

Posts 114
Kansas

5 posted 2001-07-23 11:23 AM

I wish i was around for all your early work, I'll try and find some. This amazing and the feeling of the pain, the sounds, the hurt, it all seems to speak to me in volumes. If only... /Nick/

keoni
Senior Member

since 2000-10-16

Posts 850
Up in the mountains in the NFC

6 posted 2001-07-23 02:38 PM

Ina, this was very good. One of my fav's from this series. I also can really connect with this one. I have times that are very bleak and I find refuge in certain things. Trying to ease my pain, knowing the whole time none of it will help. I can really relate. This was great. They just keep getting better in this series, can't wait for the next one. If you ever want to talk, I'm not hard to find.
Jon

"Your anger is a gift"-Rage Against The Machine
"Only God can judge me" Tupac Shakur

Ina
Senior Member

since 2000-10-09

Posts 1236
Quebec, Canada

7 posted 2001-07-23 04:56 PM

Thanks you for all your replies, this was to me the hardest poem to write and share. Im glad you enjoyed.

Regina

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

8 posted 2001-07-24 08:31 PM

I really liked this one Regi! Blew me away. Wowness. I loved it. I hope things get better for you though.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

Somewhere out there a cow is laughing at you

anonymous albert ?

Member Elite

since 2001-03-23

Posts 2979

9 posted 2001-07-25 07:38 PM

loving the poem...Ina

...this had much strong emotions...very hard hitting ending...powerful!...i can relate...bye

im addicted to passions in poetry!...are you?

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

10 posted 2001-07-30 03:41 PM

This poem is awesome.. definitely the most powerful of all the ones you've written in the series. Very nice work!

--Marie

You think yourself a failure, but perhaps the biggest loss is winning.

Acies

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-07

Posts 7665
Twilight Zone

11 posted 2001-08-29 12:24 PM

hey Ina, this poem, like most of your other poems, has bothered me. Seems like you are still going thru a lot of hardships. I do believe that you should consult with a professional. A teacher or a school guidance couselor should be able to help you figure out all these things that bother you in your life. I do hope that things do get better for you. *hugs*

hi Sweets, Lizzy, Kris, Ina, Allysa, Erica, Minna, Kit, Kamie, Javi, Jenn, Sharon, Nan, Cawlee, Cherish, Ashley, Sara, Justine, Leah, Jess, Kimmie, Ma

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