Teen Poetry #5 |
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Under the Mat |
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Ree Ree Member
since 2001-06-28
Posts 56providence, RI |
And it snowed, for the first time in a long time... That's the day he broke her heart. That's the day she thought she'd die. That's the day she knew would come, just like she knew the snow would. She knew it would happen, but she refused to let that stop her, she pretended the summer would never end. And it snowed, For the first time in a long time... And he called her for the first time all day. He knew it'd hurt both of them, but he had to know for sure. He didn't mean for it to happen, but that night he knew it was over, just like the summer was. When the snow fell, there was no turning back. And it snowed, For the first time in a long time... That's the day they were all mad, 'cause they never thought it'd happen again. And everyone blamed him, and everyone blamed her. But they refused to blame eachother. It wasn't their fault that summer was gone. The end had come so quickley, so abruptly with one snowfall....... |
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© Copyright 2001 maria - All Rights Reserved | |||
SEA![]() ![]()
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
You are gaining a fan in me ![]() ![]() |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
What a great piece of writing, Maria. Like SEA, I love pieces that start with 'And' too. it brings so much more to the poem because it feels like a continuation from something that isn't there. This is going into the library. The wording was great, as was the repetition. Well done. ~AF~ "Always keep focus on your dreams because most often than not that's all you'll have." - Javier |
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xShUgArHiGhx![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
This was an amazing piece..i truly loved it! ShE'S nOt ThE kInDa GiRL..WhO lIkeS tO tElL tHe WorLd AbOuT tHe Way She FEEL'S aBouT hErSelf...ShE tAkEs a LiTtLe TiMe In MakIn uP hEr MiNd.. |
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MindlessPoet Member
since 2001-04-20
Posts 106Texas |
the and and the repetition and everything was good. First I've seen you here (go figure I've been gone) but I'll be looking around for some more, hehe. For now, all I can do is dream. |
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TopGunLauren Senior Member
since 2000-08-02
Posts 718California |
I really like this poem keep up the great work. Lauren "I just needed someone to talk to you were just to busy with yourself."-Staind |
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xShUgArHiGhx![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
I just had to read this one again...i kno i've already replied but theres jus somethin about this piece that i really like but im not shur what it is...GREAT POEM! ShE'S nOt ThE kInDa GiRL..WhO lIkeS tO tElL tHe WorLd AbOuT tHe Way She FEEL'S aBouT hErSelf...ShE tAkEs a LiTtLe TiMe In MakIn uP hEr MiNd.. |
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