This Being the Will of J.B. Philogene

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Winston Froom
Junior Member

since 2001-11-28

Posts 32

0 posted 2001-12-03 05:49 PM

Please reply to this if it somehow strikes your fancy. I'd like to know how my first posting is welcome (or rejected.)

This Being the Will of J.B. Philogene

If the true insight of my affairs
has been concealed from me,
Then heed my demand: "Reveal it now!".

The hourglass is merciless
and posterity is steadfast,
But my decay is inevitable.
Behold what I leave behind:

To Lady Currency,
you are entitled to my debts and dues.
To Gen. Vendetta,
I yield the burden of my rage and anguish.
To my dear Mr. Covet,
My estates of guilt are gracefully granted.

Now one item remains,
destined to no other than Mother Sincerity.
Alas!, this is the quotient of completion:
The interrogant that ponders
the purpose of my existence.

Knight of Secrecy
Member

since 2001-10-12

Posts 113
San Juan, Puerto Rico

1 posted 2001-12-03 06:38 PM

I think you did a preety great job, not the type of poem that you constantly see here in piptalk which I like. You did a good job.

Welcome to PIP

-C.M.

"I feel the sting of an insignificant wasp, and yet, I fear that I am alergic"

chasing rain
Senior Member

since 2001-05-15

Posts 737
Canada

2 posted 2001-12-03 06:38 PM

Winston Froom:

Firstly, welcome to PIP, the forum for poets and poets alike, and eraser-less pencils! *gets weirded out* o_O;

Finally, something a little different. And quite interesting too. I've only seen one poet write something like this (not on the same topic, but in the same style).

The opening stanza was quite strong. I really liked the way you wrote the plea, and the demanding tone. It was like an attention grabber. Something I like in a poem. ^_^

I thought your personifications of the objects in the second stanza not only added strength to the poem, but also truth. ^^;

The third stanza was quite something...enjoyable? To an extent. ^_^ I liked how you took the "people" and related to them to their inheritence. Clever. As well, you wrote it in such a way that it didn't sound cheesy. Good job! ^_^

The way you opened up the last stanza left a hint of mystery and light suspense.

The last 2 lines were my favorite, although I don't know why. It made me think for a bit.

A very professional, and enjoyable read! Thank you!

By the way, your poems are always welcome, no rejections here, unless, of course, they go against rules. *nods*

Keep up the great work! I look forward to reading more from you! ^_^

++ Leah ++

Va pensiero sull' ali dorate...

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

3 posted 2001-12-03 06:49 PM

Welcome! I liked this. I liked the wording and the way it comes together.

Please check your email for a special greeting!

rolly_polly
Junior Member

since 2001-10-10

Posts 41
puerto rico

4 posted 2001-12-03 07:08 PM

Hey man!...Holy crap...i thought this totally rocked

, my god this is by far one of the best poems i've read here in pip...*nods* yes i am impressed

*drools* lol...nah but seriously i am still kinda speechless, we shall converse later on about this..ya hear?
Well anyway keep posting here WE WANT MORE! MORE! *crowd goes wild*
LATERZ

~parallel universe~

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

5 posted 2001-12-03 09:12 PM

"The hourglass is merciless
and posterity is steadfast,
But my decay is inevitable.
Behold what I leave behind:"

^ Very cool stanza... ^ That was awesome. This piece is very unique in it's structure, and something I always enjoy seeing. You struck my interest here, and I look forward to seeing more from you! So post away, but don't forget about the replies, either

Welcome to Passions in Poetry! I think you'll find an encouraging community of poets here, and I certainly hope you stick around!

Welcome, and very nice work.

--Marie

If there's one thing I've learned, it's that the most frustrated people in the world are those who know they're stupid, but keep trying anyway.

[This message has been edited by Fading Away (edited 12-03-2001).]

deadeyes
Junior Member

since 2001-11-07

Posts 33

6 posted 2001-12-03 10:03 PM

I've never lost faith on you my brother. I've always thought of you as a brilliant mind whom doesn't think highly of himself and in rare cases you should. Your down to earthness doesn't make you realize your talent for the arts. Kepp up the good work and just so you know..i've alays known you had it. No surpise to me. Later and keep posting from now on I know this gets better. =)

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

7 posted 2001-12-04 01:25 AM

Welcome to our humble home of poets fellow brother of musical cadence and written verse. You continue to amaze me throughout my time of knowing you. Grant it- I would have liked to delve within who you were before you dispersed from our used-to-be-home, but Alas, twas not so.
I'd like to point out, though, that you have a pure talent in poetry and emotion that I truly do appreciate and would like to see on a regular basis.
Welcome to the realm of expression....I am sure you will find a few familiar faces within these walls.
Enjoy brother....

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

Somewhere out there a cow is laughing at you

[This message has been edited by Dopey_Dope (edited 12-04-2001).]

TopGunLauren
Senior Member

since 2000-08-02

Posts 718
California

8 posted 2001-12-04 01:32 AM

Wow...very intence well written poem I love it keep up the awsome work.
Lauren

xShUgArHiGhx

Member Elite

since 2000-09-26

Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs

9 posted 2001-12-04 09:54 AM

WELCOME!!!

This was a very strong piece..i look forward to reading more from you!

ShE'S nOt ThE kInDa GiRL..WhO lIkeS tO tElL tHe WorLd AbOuT tHe Way She FEEL'S aBouT hErSelf...ShE tAkEs a LiTtLe TiMe In MakIn uP hEr MiNd..

fulanodetal3684
Junior Member

since 2001-10-10

Posts 19

10 posted 2001-12-04 12:25 PM

Congratulations on a great piece, I too think you have always had it, I'd like to see more of this, I'm sure you have much more of them, I'm looking now even more to the "tertulias", this was very well thought and rehearsed. It is much better than you said it would be, but I think you know that, it is great!

banburycross
Senior Member

since 2001-03-27

Posts 946
viginia

11 posted 2001-12-04 01:22 PM

this is easily among the most amazing first posts ive ever read, this is pretty amazing stuff. what is javi talking about? anyway, i look forward to reading more from you, your talent shows in every line.

Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing.

Winston Froom
Junior Member

since 2001-11-28

Posts 32

12 posted 2001-12-04 01:45 PM

My honest gratitude to all who took the time to read and reply to this, I appreciate your welcome. I look forward to keep reading the fantastic posts here and along the way post some stuff of my own. Thanks again!

.......... W.F.

Acies

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-07

Posts 7665
Twilight Zone

13 posted 2001-12-09 12:44 PM

WELCOME TO PASSIONS!!!

your poem is very well written
the thoughts put into it is so well constructed
you have impressed we already
hope to see more in the future

là où est mon amour?
donde está mi amour?
wo ist meine Liebe?

anonymousfemale
Member Elite

since 2000-02-02

Posts 2797
Limbo

14 posted 2001-12-10 08:33 AM

Welcome to Passions!!

Well, this is quite an entrance! I enjoyed this immensely. Your style of writing is not one found in Teen quite often. There are only a couple of other people I can think of that write like this and they are rarely found these days.

I look forward to reading many more of your pieces. I hope that you too take the time to look at others.

Take care and thanks for sharing.

~AF~

"When I eat I feel. It is better if I don't feel, I am too afraid." - Ellen West

Ceinwyn
Member Elite

since 2000-07-09

Posts 2175
VA

15 posted 2002-01-26 01:16 PM

I am late with the welcomes..I apologize...I must admit your poem engulfed me, it was like deja vu, and It did catch my fancy..I think I've found my favourite poet!! and I haven't done that yet..you have striked a cord..most definately..you are quite different..very different indeed and humble I suppose..=) I hope to read more from you..

Kristen

~The ice is thin, come on dive in, underneath my lucid skin...~

Skyfire

Member Elite

since 2000-12-27

Posts 3381
Riding

16 posted 2002-01-26 09:12 PM

I really truly like this one! Very interesting format you've got here! Hmmm... I think it shall go into my library, and I think I shall wait in anticipation for your next piece! Again, excellent job!

Find me a pidgeon that can solve my problems, and I'll find you a cat that can eat that pidgeon

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