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branden726

Senior Member

since 2000-09-25

Posts 607
Bay City, MI

0 posted 2001-12-02 12:59 PM

Though I never knew you,
I loved you very much,
Though I never met you,
I wished I could feel your touch,
Though I never met you,
You made my heart turn to mush,
Though I learned to love you,
With every bit of my heart

Jenn Cirrincione

Member Elite

since 2000-07-02

Posts 2107
Fl

1 posted 2001-12-02 10:49 AM

Well... I relate to this so darn much

This was so simple, I loved it. And there's a lot of truth in it.

Jenn

"I want love on my own terms; after everything I've ever learned. Me, I carry too much baggage..."

EagleScorpion
Senior Member

since 2000-03-08

Posts 1644
Here, Now, Forever

2 posted 2001-12-02 09:46 PM

yea i think i can relate to this too..
that person who you know is the one.. but you've never met them b4 or anything

banburycross
Senior Member

since 2001-03-27

Posts 946
viginia

3 posted 2001-12-03 01:19 PM

very simple and straight forwrd. i like this one

Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing.

xShUgArHiGhx

Member Elite

since 2000-09-26

Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs

4 posted 2001-12-03 01:27 PM

I understand exactly how you feel here brandon...short and sweet

i enjoyed this!

ShE'S nOt ThE kInDa GiRL..WhO lIkeS tO tElL tHe WorLd AbOuT tHe Way She FEEL'S aBouT hErSelf...ShE tAkEs a LiTtLe TiMe In MakIn uP hEr MiNd..

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

5 posted 2001-12-07 07:15 AM

I know what you're saying here, and I know what you're trying to get across. Due to the fact that it's a short poem, I think you need to put a little more power into it. The repitition is too much for such a short piece, and you kind of leave the reader hanging at the end. I think you can do more with this.
Nice work, just the same. Very tough situation.

Take care,

--Marie

If there's one thing I've learned, it's that the most frustrated people in the world are those who know they're stupid, but keep trying anyway.

anonymousfemale
Member Elite

since 2000-02-02

Posts 2797
Limbo

6 posted 2001-12-07 12:52 PM

Ok I couldn't relate to this at all but it's good that others can.
Thanks for the read, branden.

~AF~

Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant? I'm halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my gosh....I could be eating a slow learner.

Acies

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-07

Posts 7665
Twilight Zone

7 posted 2001-12-21 11:09 AM

hmmmm, I'm just wondering who this is for

là où est mon amour?
donde está mi amour?
wo ist meine Liebe?
Nelly Furtado é a menina a mais bonita no mundo largo do todo.

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